Friendship and Loyalty
by DalamarF16
Summary: Post season 1 - After they have taken down Fisk, Nelson & Murdock is having a very good moment: they have a lot of clients and they also get paid. Everything changes when Stick cames back into Matt's life, asking for his help. Will Daredevil accept to work again with him? Will he cross the line between punching people and killing them? -[no adult contents]
1. A day like any other

PERSONAL SPACE: Hi everyone! This is my first story about Daredevil, and also my first one in English (I'm italian).

I'd really like to thank my beta, InsertImaginativeNameHere, for helping me with grammar. If you can read this fanfiction is mostly thank to her who cleaned up the mess I've made! Thank you for your work and your patience!

I let you guys read the first chapter, I hope you like it, and if you want to let me know what do you think about this (both positve and negative opinions, of course), please leave a review. :)

Chapter 1: A morning like any other.

It was a morning like any other.

Matt Murdock opened his eyes when he heard the wake-up call of his alarm-clock, and like every morning the world caught fire around him. He pushed the white button to turn it off and a metallic female voice informed him that was 7 a.m.

Time to get up.

He moved with usual attention to his body, but this time he didn't feel any pain. The night before he hadn't gone out for his usual patrol of Hell's Kitchen, so there were no fresh injuries to care about, but he realized that only some minutes later, when he stopped moving like an automaton and started to really wake up.

He got up and went to the bathroom; he really needed a shower.

The day before was one of those day you can't really define as "busy" or "chaotic" or "crazy". It was all those thing together and more. He, Karen and Foggy didn't really get a moment's peace.

Since they had managed to get Fisk and put him where he belonged, they had become really famous in Hell's Kitchen and their number of clients had gone up in a staggering way; and the real news was that some of them could really afford to pay them.

For the first time since Matt could remember (not counting the period in which they didn't speak to each other), he and Foggy had to work different cases on their own, with an outstanding Karen who did her best to help both of them and at the same time took care of the potential clients waiting for their moment.

As result, they barely had anything for lunch and went home after midnight.

Matt stood near the window for some time, listening the voices of the city, trying to figure out if someone needed his help.

When nothing came up, he gave a sigh of relief, let himself fall on his bed and fell asleep still wearing his work suit.

When he got home last night, he had considered changing from those clothes to the Daredevil ones directly, and after he resolved to not go out, his body and his mind didn't have the strength to change his outfit for more comfortable sweatpants and t-shirt.

-Foggy. Foggy. Foggy. Foggy. Foggy...-

He had just taken the first step into the bathroom when his phone began to ring, saying the name of the one who was calling him.

Matt sighed and went back to the kitchen where he had left it. If the caller had been Karen, he would have left it to ring and called her later, but it was Foggy, and since he had discovered his secret, morning calls had become a sort of habit. His partner phoned him just to check if Matt had reached home safe enough to call Claire to stitch him up.

If Matt hadn't picked up, his best friend would probably have run to his place to check if he was ok, and he didn't want him to worry, so he answered the phone as fast as he could.

-Hey, buddy. Are you ok? It took you a long time to pick up...-

Matt couldn't avoid smiling. Foggy's concern had always moved him, even if his friend never treated him like he was made of glass, and that was also one of the reasons that led to not telling him about his second job.

-Yeah- he answered -I'm ok. I was having a shower-

-Oh. Sorry. But... are you ok? I mean... you know-

-Yeah. Last night I stayed at home-

-Really?- even someone who wasn't blind could hear the relief in his partner's voice.

-Too tired-

-So...see you at the office?-

-Yeah. Leave me a donut.-

Matt hung up the phone and finally managed to reach the shower. He changed the suit and went directly to the "Nelson & Murdock" main (not to mention only) office.

When he arrived at the office, after he had paid the cab he took from the apartment to his work place, he saw with relief that no clients had shown up yet. Foggy and Karen were already there and they were waiting for him so they could have breakfast together.

It was a habit started by Foggy the moment they started to talk to each other again after the fight they had about the discovery of Daredevil's true identity. Just like the regular phone calls.

Matt wasn't bothered about the new routine.

The weeks he had passed without Foggy were the worse since his father's death. Foggy wasn't just his best friend, or his partner at work.

When he almost lost him because of his second job, at the beginning he thought he could manage to take care of himself alone, but soon he began to miss his useless chats, his way of non-stop complaining about, well, basically everything.

It was the complete opposite to his own way of life.

Since he had lost his sight, when the other senses had increased their intensity, he had gradually begun to only speak if it was absolutely necessary. Everything was so loud around him that he didn't feel the need to add more noise to the noise; besides, he wasn't someone who liked to have company.

As a kid, even before his dad's death, he didn't have many friends. At school he spent all the time studying or doing his homework. His father wanted him to be a good student and build for himself a better future than he had, and Matt spent all his time trying to do that for Jack, to make his father proud of him. In the afternoon he used to go with his dad to the gym, where both worked for a better life, with opposite methods. After the accident, being blind was reason enough to be excluded from the social life of his schoolmates, but he didn't really complain about that. His teachers used to say that he looked and acted much older than an 8 years old boy, maybe because he always had to help his father work things out with the money that Jack earned from his fighting, and that wasn't simple sometimes. As a result, Matt didn't wear expensive clothes, and didn't go to other kids' birthday parties, because often he didn't have the money to buy them a present.

So, in a certain way, being blind made things easier on that point of view.

He focused even more than before on his books and when his father died things simply got even worse. His senses began to increase, and after Jack had gone, being alone in a children's home, full of noise. Everything was simply in chaos and he really thought he would go mad.

Even in the church, or in the little chapel of the orphanage, he couldn't find peace. It was like when his dad died, some kind of shield had fallen, allowing the rest of the world to reach him all at once, forcing him to stay in his bedroom, his hands covering ears, in a desperate attempt to deaden sounds around him.

Then Stick stepped in Matt's life, just to leave him when he started to consider him like family.

But Stick didn't want a son. He wanted a soldier, ready to kill on his orders. Matt would never be like that. His mentor had understood that values of the Catholic religion and the education Jack Murdock had given to him were strong inside the young boy and so he decided to let him alone again.

Since that moment Matt convinced himself that he would pass the rest of his life alone, and years had passed. He grew up, but he couldn't manage to have a stable relationship with an other human (or animal) being. He had tried with a dog, but it didn't suit him.

Then, that day, his first in college, a computer mistake made him meet a weird guy who was trying to enter a Punjabi course just because he had a crush for a girl.

He had asked for a single room, because he didn't want people feel sad for him or (worse) treat him like something delicate. He had hated that ever since he was a kid.

Foggy was different and soon Matt had discovered the warm of a real friendship and since then they had become inseparable. Finally he had a family again, and he had almost lost everything all over again because of something he did.

The night after the fight, he felt so guilty and in pain that he couldn't eat without throwing up and the following days were terrible. He went to the office only late in the night, often after his patrol in Hell's Kitchen, when he knew Foggy wasn't there (Karen sometimes was, but he had no problem with her), and used the day to sleep and recover after being the Devil of Hell's Kitchen.

Everything seemed to go the right way, even without his best friend (after all, he still had Karen), but he felt so lonely that he wanted to cry out in joy when, after Ben's funeral, Foggy went to him and they decided to move on, trying to rebuild their friendship and to take down Fisk.

Morning calls and breakfast were part of their new friendship, but Matt didn't care. He would accept everything if the reward was having his family back.

-You're late- Karen said as a morning greeting

-Sorry-

-We're hungry, man! Get up earlier next time!- protested Foggy, but Matt could perceive his friend's smile behind that.

-Yeah. I bet you ate at least two or three donuts before even arriving here!-

-No way!-

-Four?-

-Screw you, Murdock!-

But he was already laughing, and Matt sensed from his breath he really had eaten them, two, or maybe three. He smelled strawberry, chocolate, and maybe custard and... was that Marci's perfume?

He smiled and took the donut and cup of coffee Karen was offering him with a smile and a soft "thank you". He really needed coffee to wake up.

-What's the agenda today?- Foggy asked Karen suddenly, his mouth half full of his breakfast.

-Don't know yet- she answered -but you have to be in court at 4 p.m. for the kid who's being charged for some money stolen from an old woman outside the bank.-

Foggy nodded. That was an easy case, because at the time of the robbery, it had shown that he was having a test in school, so he was definitely innocent.

Like they had foreseen in the morning, the judge decided to drop charges against Peter and the two partners came back to their office in a very good mood. They didn't have any other cases for that day, and it was almost dark outside, so Foggy dismissed Karen for the rest of the day.

-So?- asked Foggy

-So what?-

-Last night-

-I told you. I stayed at home. We left the office after midnight, remember? I was so tired I feel asleep still wearing my suit-

-Which one?-

-Are you serious?-

-I can't feel your heartbeat, remember? How do I know if you are telling me the truth?-

Again? Seriously? Matt sighed. He could understand Foggy's concern about Daredevil, and even that he felt betrayed, but he really couldn't get why he continued to question everything he said to him.

I lied once, to protect him and Karen, and almost lost him.

He would never make the same mistake again.

-Why should I lie to you?-

-Because you care about him, kid-

Matt froze.


	2. I am not going anywhere

**PERSONAL SPACE** : Ok, here I am with Chapter 2. I'm studying for my final exams, so I'm planning to upload this story once a week, on tuesday, so it will be easy for you to follow it, and I will have time to write this thing properly.

I'd like to really thank everyone who read the first chapter (you come from all over the world...I wasn't really aware of that before, and that's amazing!), specially who put it in fav/follows list, and, of course, who rewieved it! I really appreciated! You made my day!

Last, but not least, thanks again to my beta InsertImaginativeNameHere, you are doing an amazing job, I'll never stop saying that to you!

Ok. I'll stop and let you reading the next chapter!

Let me know what do you think about it, if you want, please!

* * *

 **Chapter 2: I am not going anywhere.**

Until that moment, Foggy had thought he knew every side of Matt Murdock, but he wasn't prepared to see him frozen like that.

He didn't have Matt's superpower of feeling alterations in human figures, but he could clearly perceive a sudden tightness in his friend's body, and he saw his face loose one or two shades of pink.

Almost like a soldier in front of his superior officer, Matt suddenly stood up, straightening his shoulders and back in tension.

He grabbed his stick and held it tight, as if he might have to use it as a weapon at any second, or, Foggy thought, as if he needed it to keep something under control.

He hadn't seen Matt like this before; he always managed to stay calm, to control his emotions, his fears, but now he couldn't do that at all. His fingers kept moving on the surface of the handle of his stick and he could swear his best friend was slightly shaking for a moment, before he managed to dominate his instinct.

Whomever this voice was, he had the capability to scare Matt to death. That definitely couldn't be good news.

-Matt? Are you okay?- he asked in a soft voice, just when an old man stepped into the office, leaning on a stick. A white and red stick.

A blind old man. Matt acting like that.

-Stick- was the only thing Foggy was able to say, barely moving his lips.

* * *

-Your friend is smart-

The sound of Stick's voice, no more mitigated by walls and Foggy's increasing heartbeat made Matt react to what was happening.

He forced himself to completely control his body; he made an extraordinary effort to make himself stop trembling with fear. He wasn't scared for himself, he could manage his mentor, but he didn't want to do that in front of his partner. He held his stick, ready to face the old man.

-Foggy. Go home- he ordered, and he noticed that his voice came out tense and hoarse. The sudden appearance of Stick in his life for the second time in a couple of months had shocked him, especially because this time he had shown up here, in his office, where his friends were. Matt knew what the message was behind Stick's gesture; if he could figure out the Devil's real identity and find where he worked, the enemy could too.

-No way-

-Foggy...-

-I am not going anywhere, Matt-

-You really think you can do something against me, mister Nelson?- Stick asked, interrupting the dialogue between the two of them, a little irony in his voice.

Hearing his best friend's surname made Matt shiver with fear. Stick knew.

Matt understood suddenly that if Stick wanted him to be a soldier, a lonely vigilante who didn't really care about other people's lives, he could have Foggy and Karen killed, or, worse kill them himself.

He felt the panic grow inside his chest.

 _Calm down, Matt. Calm down._

He tried desperately to wipe away the images of Karen and Foggy's dead bodies that his brain created from nothing, covered in blood, their eyes open and empty of their souls, but it wasn't simple. He never saw their faces, what he knew about their features was what they had told him about themselves, but despite this, they appeared as clear as if he was actually able to see a photo taken by Forensics.

Matt could actually see Karen's long, blonde hair spread on the floor of the office, a hole in her forehead, and, on her side, Foggy's slightly overweight body (as he described himself) fatally wounded by knives, his right hand still holding their secretary left. His partner died slowly and in a lot of pain by Stick's hand. Matt barely accepted Ben's death, he couldn't stand something like that again. Not his fault, again.

He barely resisted the temptation to shake his head, to throw that mental picture away.

Stick knew that if anything could make him cross the line between punching people and killing them, that could really be Foggy's murder, and Matt knew his mentor knew that as well. And the lawyer was also aware that if he really wanted, the old man would do it without a second's thought.

He had tried to train Matt the same way, but his father's teachings were so deep-rooted inside of him, and his faith in religion so strong, that Stick fortunately couldn't subjugate him.

-Maybe not- answered Foggy, stubborn despite his voice shaking a little, making Matt come back to reality -but I am not leaving Matt alone with you-

-Foggy, please... - the young blind man began to speak, but he couldn't finish the sentence.

-So, Matty has told you about his little secret- Stick interrupted him, and, like he was a kid again, he shoot his mouth up, his hand pinching his stick until his knuckle turned white for fear and anger. After almost twenty years, this man manage to overcome him without making a single nod.

This sense of powerless in front of him, drove him crazy. He was a grown up man, so why couldn't face him? He pick up all his courage to speak and bring Stick's attention on him, making a step to place himself between Foggy and Stick.

-What do you want, Stick? I've already told you; stay out of my city- _And away from my family_ , he thought, but wasn't brave enough to say out-loud. Besides, from his movements and the position he had taken, he knew his former coach would have noticed that his priority was to protect his partner.

Stick still had a lot of power over him, as always, but this time was different; Foggy's life was on the line, his worse nightmare becoming true and he wouldn't allow to his awe to paralyse him.

-And I've told you family is a weakness, kid-

-Yeah, and I've ignored you- _After I've listened to you and failed_ , he told himself, but that wasn't the time to point that out.

-So did I-

-Get out of Hell's Kitchen-

-Or what? You'll kill me, kid?- Stick paused -Oh, I forgot. You can't kill. You still are a kid, after all-

-Killing is not the solution- suddenly Foggy spoke again, and his voice was like a flash in a dark, clear night.

-Foggy, please. Stay out of this- Matt stopped him, and something broke in him, as if Foggy's voice had interrupted his concentration. Suddenly he wasn't able to have full control of his body, he began to tremble again, when the image of his best friend dead came back to his mind

* * *

-Matt...- when he noticed Matt was shaking, he stopped talking, struck dumb by the sudden changing of behaviour in his partner.

He had seen him angry, hitting a punchbag with all his strength when he went to see him at the gym after missing Ben's funeral; he had discovered his weak side when he was ill, many years ago, when they were roommates in college (he still could remember as it happened yesterday, his friend lying in bed, hands over his ears, almost crying in pain. Now he knew it was because the headache and fever prevented him from focusing and cutting out the rest of the world, but still, it was something you couldn't really forget), but he had never thought Matt could be terrified by anything or anyone.

He had always seen him like a man without fear, who faced the world (and God, maybe, but he would never say that in front of him) who took his sight away to stop him from doing... well, everything.

Right now, Matt was completely in a panic, Foggy could feel it, and for him that was enough.

Until a moment ago he had seemed calm, but now he was really upset, like if this man had done some mental Jedi mind trick to him. After he discovered the whole "world in fire" thing, and the incident of New York he began to think that everything was possible.

Foggy had never, never, seen his friend in this way, and all he wanted was to put his hand on his shoulder and make him feel he was with him and that he had full trust, but he also understood that something like that could sentence him to death, so he forced himself to stay still, staring at Matt's back, praying for him to be safe.

-I'm not going to cross that line, Stick, you know- Matt was saying, his voice now was strong, like he was using his fear to find the strength to face his old mentor.

All that Foggy could do was take a step closer to his best friend, trying to support him without touching him or talking. He knew Matt would hear his movements, but he also hoped he'd understand.

Probably he did, because the blond attorney saw the blind man's fingers relaxing imperceptibly around the stick, while he made a step to the right to be a complete wall between him and that old man.

-You can't save shit this way, kid! There are people who simply deserve to die-

-No one deserves to die-

-Stop being an altar boy, kid! This is real life. You are a warrior and warriors kill-

-What do you want from me?- Matt asked again, stopping a discussion that wouldn't lead anywhere.

-You. I need a soldier-

-Find someone else-

-Matt...- the blind man tried to make one last attempt to convince him.

-Get out, Stick- Matt's tone was categorical.

-You'll regret this, kid-

And without another word, the blind old man took his stick and went out, disappearing in the night, leaving a shaking, silent Matt in the center of his office.

* * *

A second later it was like someone had hit Matt with a taser. He suddenly began to move fast.

The taser was Stick's last words. Basically, he told him he would accept to help him, one way or another, and he really didn't want him to use the bad ones.

-Foggy- he said while he started to collect his things -Take Karen with you and go away for a while-

-Matt...-

-There's no time- the blind man kept talking like Foggy wasn't really there -You have to move. No plane, possibly no train. Use the bus. Or take a cab-

-Matt.-

-Don't worry about the money, I'll take care of that as soon as I can. I'll pay you everything...-

-MATT!-

Now Foggy was basically screaming, trying to make his way into his friend's fear. The scream finally reached its goal, and the young lawyer stopped, watching his friend where he knew his face was, still trembling.

-Fog- he began, trying to stay calm when all he wanted was to take Foggy and Karen and put them on a cab, without even allowing them the time to take some clothes -There isn't much time-

-I am not going anywhere, Matt- he murmured quietly, staring the Devil of Hell's Kitchen right in his blind eyes, hidden behind a pair of red glasses.

That simple phrase was enough to stop him doing a million different things at the same time.

-You heard him-

-Yes. I did. And you listen to me, right now, Daredevil; I. Am. Not. Going. Anywhere. Understood?-

-You can't stay, Foggy. He will kill you just to make me became what he wants-

-And?-

-Don't you get the point?-

-Not really-

-He knows who you are, probably also where you live. You are in danger- Matt explained, trying not to raise his voice against him.

-I repeat: and?-

Matt sighed, at the end of his tether. He always thought Foggy was smart, but now he was acting like a stupid child or, he realized with a bit of fun, like he couldn't see the reality surrounding him.

-Are you even listening to me?-

-I am, Matt. I am. It's the same, old story; you go out in the night, punching people, and if they discover who you are, we are all dead. Understood. But it doesn't change anything. I'm standing here, at your side, saving your ass-

-Risking your own life- Matt finished the sentence instead of his partner.

-Not with you next to me, right?-

He felt Foggy's grin, and couldn't do anything but smile, with tears in his eyes, hidden behind his glasses.

He had always known his friend was loyal to him, he had proved himself a thousand times during college, refraining from going to some parties to stay with him, or reading whole books for him, recording his voice for him, whenever he couldn't find a Braille written version, but he couldn't have even imagined trusting him literally with his life.

-I'll keep you safe- promised Matt, his voice broken.

-I know you will, Daredevil- Foggy answered finally able to put his hands over Matt's shoulders and squeezing them slightly to let him know he could rely on him.

What Foggy didn't know, was that there was only a way to keep his promise: do what Stick wanted, even if it would lead him directly to lose his soul.

Foggy was worth it.


	3. Deal?

**Personal space** : Once again, thanks to all of you who had read this story, whot put it in the fav list or in the follow one... It means a lot to me! Special thanks for zoeperja and goldacharmed for their rewievs. You made my day.

As always, if you can real this chapter is due to my beta InsertImaginativeNameHere... so... thank you really much!

* * *

 **Chapter 3: Deal?**

* * *

-Finally! Time for dinner! Are you coming, Matt?-

Foggy got up from the chair behind the desk of Matt's office which the two of them were sharing to work on a new case. It was something they used to do since they had become associates at Landman and Zack

They used to sit together reading documents and searching info on the internet, talking about what they had found and doing a sort of brainstorming to came up with a possible strategy.

It was around 10 pm, not exactly the right time for a full dinner, but Stick's visit had shocked both of them, and Foggy couldn't manage to calm down by himself, so Matt had thought that it might be more useful for his friend to begin to work on their new client's requests instead of going home and only to keep thinking about what happened.

Besides, if Foggy was with him, he could protect him.

-Yeah. I'm coming-

Matt tried not to think that it could be one of the last meals he would have with his best friend. He had no idea of the intentions of his old mentor, but he was sure that if he really wanted his help, he would find a way to use him. As always.

Every time the lawyer thought about it, anger and frustration rose in him, making him wish he wasn't so weak.

Your family his your almost could hear Stick's voice in his head, telling him not to be such a mawkish pussy. He shook his head to clear his mind. He had to stay lucid and think.

-Are you ok, buddy?- Foggy asked for the hundredth time, not without reason. He was aware that he'd been probably the most terrible company that day, but his brain was working really hard to find a way out. However, deep down, he knew that there was only one thing to do in order to save his friends.

He didn't dare to ask more about the blind man than what Matt had said to him, but he couldn't really stop asking him if he could handle the situation, and the brown-haired lawyer couldn't blame Foggy for that.

-I'm ok- he replied, then he decided to clarify, knowing that Foggy wouldn't stop caring about him. (Probably he wouldn't anyway, but it was worth a try) -Stick is... was an important part of my past. Without him teaching me I would probably have been driven mad, but he wants me to be his soldier, to be completely focus on this war he thinks is going on...-

-He wants you to be a killer, too?- Foggy interrupted him, probably for the first time since their fight. He usually let him talk and then he asked questions, when he needed to understand something better. This wasn't the case. Matt understood he was probably scared to death, behind this kind of mask of a concerned friend he was trying to keep on his face, successfully, at least for now.

-Probably- he started, then he rectified himself, choosing to be completely honest - Yes. He wants me cross that line-

-Can he?- Matt could clearly hear his friend's fear, right now. The mask had fallen apart, revealing a really nervous and terrified Foggy. The blind man found himself strongly moved by the show of concern. He always considered his partner like family, because he was the only one he had in his life, but so far he hadn't fully realized that it was the same for Foggy. That made things more difficult for him, and, for a second, his resolution had shaken.

 _You can't go back, Murdock._ He told to himself, his inner voice so similar to Stick's it was annoying. _It's for his safety_.

-What?- he asked.

-Make you do that-

-I don't think so- _If only I could be as certain as I sound..._

-And what about... I mean.. you almost killed Fisk after Miss Cardenas' death...what if he can push some button and make you become a killer?- Nothing to say about that. Foggy was a damn good lawyer. He knew exactly what to ask and when. Like right now.

 _You mean what if he touches you or Karen...or Claire?_ He thought, but he buried his fear under the menu of the small restaurant Foggy had taken him to, pretending he could actually see it.

-Matt?-

-What?-

-You can really _read_ it?-

-Not at all- he admitted, and at the same time he cursed himself. That was a rookie mistake. Now Foggy would know that he had something else in his mind -I was just... - he tried to save himself, to prevent Foggy from knowing he had already decided what to do. -overthinking-

-About Stick?-

He nodded, a sad smile on his face. He was trying so hard enjoy the night, to focus on Foggy, to joke and eat with him as usual, but his heart refused to support him. He really, really wanted to change the subject of the conversation, but, again, his soul had decided for him, and he found himself talking about his time at the asylum and about Stick finding him.

-You know... when he came to the orphanage, the very first time, I was going crazy. All those noises around me, they were overwhelming me...-

-He saved you?-

-In his own way...yes. He did. Then he left me.- he couldn't avoid his tone becoming bitter when he began to explain why his mentor left him. He'd realized in that moment that for all those years, he had felt guilty about that; that if he hadn't given him that stupid piece of paper he'd never have abandoned him. He could have been a good soldier, or pretended to be one, just to have someone who cared about him. -For a bracelet-

-For what?-

And Matt told him the truth about the months he spent with Stick, training himself and becoming stronger everyday and also how the man had left him when he had dared to make him that little present.

Then something, while he was still talking, something had happened in his mind.

In that moment, he really understood that Stick no longer had any influence over him. All that fear, the awe for him, they were all in his head, but they had no more reason to exist.

He was no longer the lonely kid Stick had found at the orphanage.

He did it. Even without Stick. He found Foggy, Karen, Claire, even Mrs. Cardenas.

Everything Matt would decide, he would do it for the safety of his family, not down to fear of Stick.

He was a grown man, and that old blind guy would never control him again.

He suddenly felt quite stupid for the panic attack he had experienced when the man had shown up earlier.

* * *

Foggy was really impressed.

Although he and Matt had been friends since the first time they'd met, and Matt basically knew everything about his partner's family, he had never spoken too much about his past willingly, and Foggy had never insisted on that either.

For him, it was really easy to talk about his happy childhood and how much his mother wanted for him to be a butcher, and because of that, he could barely imagine the pain Matt had suffered, so he never asked any questions, even if he had always been ready to listen to him and comfort him any time he needed.

Sometimes the blind guy had told him about his father, or, once or maybe twice, about the time he had spent in the orphanage, but he never had gone into as much depth as he was doing right now, and the blond lawyer didn't exactly know how to feel about that. He felt somehow honoured by this sudden confession, but he was also asking himself why Matt was saying all this just now. Was Matt thinking of doing something stupid?

 _Shut up, you paranoid!_ He told himself. _He's just sharing a part of his life he couldn't tell you before because of his secret. Probably he's just getting everything off his chest. Now, be a good friend, shut up and listen to him._

This time, he didn't need his best friend's superpowers to feel how painful it had been for him, how for a moment he had thought, or better, hoped, with all his heart, he had found someone who could actually replace his father, just to find out that the man had never really cared about him.

He felt, now more than ever, a real distance between the two of them. They were both born and raised in Hell's Kitchen, and their paths eventually met that day at the Columbia University, but their lives before that were totally different. He wondered how they had ended up in such a friendship.

-Man...- was the only word he could say, barely able to look Matt in his blind eyes.

-You know? He kept it. The bracelet-

-He did?-

-Yeah. I found it the night we fought at my place-

Foggy didn't really know what to say about that. Some bell, in his head, was saying to him Stick had planned everything. Everyone who could spend some time with Matt Murdock knew how emotional that guy was.

He was silent, you could say even shy, but he was led almost only by his feelings, and that had put him in trouble more times than Foggy could remember.

So, if this Stick was dangerous and cruel as Matt was saying, he could easily have let the bracelet drop to make him think he cared about him.

-What do you want to say?-

Damn Murdock and his superpowers.

-Nothing you wanna hear-

-Try me-

-Nope-

-Foggy...-

-Shut up, Matt. I'd really want to say what I am thinking, but it'd probably lead to a fight, so I'm going to keep my mouth shout-

Matt sighed, but also gave a little smile.

They ate quietly and then they separated to go to their own homes.

* * *

-Are you going to join me or not?-

For the first time in his adult life, Matt jumped out of his skin . He had been home for about an hour, and he hadn't noticed Stick's presence until he made himself apparent .

When he had spoken, the young man was barely awake, completely unaware Stick was in the apartment. He sat up immediately, almost trapped in his own sheets.

He heard his heart running fast, and he concentrated on calming himself down. He had to stay calm, and go ahead with the plan he had come up with just before going to bed.

 _You can do this_. He told himself. _Your mind controls your body, and you are no longer the scared kid you were twenty years ago._

He didn't really want to talk to him, but he forced himself to.

Matt got up, throwing his white sheets away and faced his former mentor man to man.

For a moment, he had thought he could pretend to be the same, scared guy Stick'd met at "Nelson & Murdock", but he soon realized it wasn't possible. Stick had taught him how to recognize humans' emotions and feelings by listening to their heartbeats. He could manage to fake with regular people, even with Foggy sometimes, but he had no chance with the old man, so he didn't even try to do that.

 _Let's let Stick know I am following him because of people I care about._

 _Let's show him family can also be source of strength._

-Yes- he answered without a hint of kindness in his voice -but we make a deal. Here and now. Forever. I'll do whatever you want. You stay away from my family-

-Your family? Oh, Matty, Matty... you still believe you can have one?-

Matt ignored him. He didn't care what the old man thought. It was his own life.

-Deal?- He asked in the same cold voice.

-Deal-

-What's the plan?-

-We are leaving, kid. Right now. Take your cane and leave everything behind-

Matt felt his heart suddenly heavy. He had thought that something like this could happen, obviously (and for his friends' sakes, it was even the best thing) but he felt sick anyway.

 _He is no longer controlling you._ He reminded to himself, just to be sure. _You are doing this for your family. You will come back, and you will not cross that line._

And this time, his inner voice sounded more like a mash-up between the ones of all the people he cared about. He felt a little smile reaching his face, but he forced himself to to stay serious.

Matt Murdock had to die, at least for now, he knew that.

He perfectly knew he was going to break Foggy's heart (again), but he couldn't do anything else. He wished he had seriously calculated the possibility of leaving, he wished he had left a message, or something for them at the office, but he hadn't had, and now it was too late.

 _I'm sorry, Foggy. Please, don't hate me._

He left his phone, still on, on the couch and followed his mentor.


	4. please, don't be stupid

_**PERSONAL SPACE:**_ Thanks to everyone who read, fav, followed this story, and a special thanks to the ones who reviewed!

Oh... and also to my amazing beta InsertImaginativeNameHere!

Enjoy the reading and, please please please, let me know if you have liked it!

* * *

 _ **Chapter 4: Please, don't be stupid**_

Foggy opened his eyes the next morning, finding himself in a bed that he didn't recognize as his own.

-Good morning sunshine-

A very sweet female voice brought a smile to his face, while memories from the night before came to mind. He had been on some kind of date with Marci (if "come to me and do as I say" could be considered a date).

-'Morning- he answered still lying on the bed.

-It's almost eleven. Time to get up- Marci told him with a smile and a cup of coffee in her hands.

-Is that for me?-

-No way. Yours is waiting for you in the kitchen-

-Mm...ok. Wait...eleven? Why didn't you wake me up?-

-I would have but you were sleeping like a baby. You were so cute-

 _Matt!_

As soon as his brain got connected with the world, memories of the night before had come up to his mind, reminding him to what happened, and, basically, why he had accepted playing a reversed mode of 50 shades of Grey; not that he had read it. Not a chance, but he had woken up in Marci's place suggesting an interesting turn of events.

Foggy stopped listening to her and turned himself toward the night table next to his side of the woman's bed, searching for his phone.

After the dinner with Matt, Foggy had thought about going home and taking a full night of rest after the two days that had passed, with the clients and the visit of that Stick guy, but as soon as he had found himself alone in his house, his mind had begun to show him lot of different images of Matt getting himself in trouble, or worse, getting killed; or again, being forced to kill someone because of that damn blind old man.

He had begun to pace in his own home like a lion in a cage, more worried than he had ever been for his best friend.

A couple of times he had picked up his phone and begun to search for Matt's number before stopping and reminding himself that his friend could take care of himself and also that he could do nothing useful to help him with his nocturnal activities.

So he had gone to bed and tried to get some sleep.

When he realised that was not going to happen, and he'd decided to call Marci for some company. He hadn't exactly meant that kind of company but he was not really going to complain about the two of them having some sex together to forget their problems, even if, right now, he was feeling a little bit guilty about how he had, as a matter of fact, almost used her (or had she used him? He couldn't really tell for sure because as a matter of fact, she had been in charge during the night, since his call, actually, but anyway, he had liked it, mostly because he didn't have to think too much).

-What's up, Foggy Bear?- Marci asked when she saw him searching for his phone as if his life had depended on it, which in the long run, it might. He hated that damn nickname she had found for him when they used to date in college, but right now he had more important things to do than complain about it.

-I have to call Matt- he answered, still looking for his device. He finally found it inside one of his shoes (and he refused to consider how in hell's name it had arrived there).

-Again? I have to ask. Are you two having an affair?-

-What?-

-You two are getting weird lately: morning calls, you always thinking about him... you know. Those kind of weird things...-

-I'm just worried- Foggy tried to defend himself -He's blind-

-That's not something new-

Foggy began to sweat. She was a damn good lawyer, better than him. He had to find a way out, but he didn't see anything that could help.

-Lately he's been...distracted- he tried -He often falls down, so I'm just worried about him-

-That's very kind of you-

Had she believed that? Foggy tried not to sigh in relief. He'd also seen a way to get out of her apartment.

-Yeah... listen, I'm very late and he Karen are probably gonna kill me... so...-

-... you have to go. Understood- she ended quietly, and that made Foggy feeling even worse. She'd lost her job trying to help him, and she couldn't find anything else so far. He could feel the sadness and maybe a little of envy in her voice, and, not for the first time, he really wished they could hire her at their firm, and he knew Matt and Karen did too.

She'd lost everything because of them, and now they could do nothing to help her. That was really frustrating for all of them, but mostly for Foggy. They were in some sort of relationship, and he felt really bad about what was happening to her.

Unfortunately, she was used to being very well paid, not that she didn't deserve it, she was the best in their class, except for Matt. No, wait. She was probably even better than him, only because she had decided to sell her soul and that was a step his best friend didn't want to cross, even in his day job. Meanwhile, they could barely afford to pay Karen, and that was only because she had accepted not being paid very much and maybe not exactly every month.

So he stayed near to the door, one hand on the doorknob, not knowing exactly how to respond to that.

-You'll find something- he took a step away from the door towards her. He took her hands into his owns and looked her in the eyes -I'm sure. You're a damn good lawyer-

-Who gave classified information to the enemy...-

-...in order to take down a killer who was going to tear Hell's Kitchen apart to pursue his project. That was the right thing to do, Marci-

-Yeah. I know- Was that regret in her voice? Regret? Marci? Inconceivable!

-We can hire you, if you want.- he offered, half serious, half joking -The only problem is that we can't pay you, but if you are ok with that, you're in-

Marci laughed at that strange job offer, but Foggy already knew he wouldn't accept that. She was a good person, but she was a lawyer basically for money. She was a shark, a shark with a soul, but still a shark nonetheless.

-I'm sure you will find out a way to pay me without money- she answered with a mischievous smile on her face -but I have bills to pay, Foggy Bear-

Foggy smiled and kissed her again.

-Then I'm going to help you find a new job. I promise-

-Go- she said to him, still smiling -They're waiting for you-

He nodded and left her home. While he was on the street, walking to "Nelson & Murdock", he finally turned on his phone.

He had like twenty missed calls, and all of them were from Karen. Nothing from Matt.

 _God, she is really gonna kill me._

When he opened the door of their office, all he got as greeting was a beautiful, but absolutely furious Karen Page yelling at him.

-Finally! Where were you, Foggy? And where in the hell is Matt? I had to send away two clients because neither one of you two were here!-

 _She is going to kill me. Slowly and painfully._

How could happen that such a beautiful woman could also be one of the scariest in the world? And why were Matt and Foggy so talented when it came to pissing her off? Foggy hadn't found an explanation for that, yet-

-Sorry- he tried to apologize, attempting that sad puppy gaze Matt was so good at (failing, of course. Matt was the puppy guy, not him) -I overslept-

 _Wait._

-Where's Matt?- he asked, suddenly in fear, all his fantasies about how Karen would kill him and how painfully she would do so thrown away in a rush. Matt wasn't in the office.

 _Calm down, Foggy. Maybe he's just overslept like you. Don't be paranoid._

-I hoped you'd know! I've tried to call him at least fifteen times, but he hasn't answered- she told him in a rough voice, then she ran a hand through her long, blonde hair, while her face moved from anger to concern. -I'm starting to get a little worried about him-

This wasn't the first time Matt hadn't answered his phone in the morning, but since the revelation, Foggy usually knew the real cause of his absence, but not this time. Better than that, he was hoping that his friend were at home, even hurt or bloodied, but at home. And he didn't even feel sick for wishing pain to him.

 _Please, Matt, be in so much pain you can't move, please don't be dead._

-Did he say something to you?- she asked him, bringing him back to reality.

-I haven't seen or heard from him since last night- he was forced to admit, trying to control his own fear to reassure her -I'm sure he's met some woman and got overslept too-

-Yeah. Maybe- Was that sadness in her voice?

-Listen. You stay here, I'll go to his place, ok?-

She nodded, and he left the office.

 _Murdock, tell me you haven't done something really stupid, like joining that Stick guy. Please._

It was almost 12am, so Foggy decided to take the subway instead of getting stuck in traffic.

When he finally reached his best friend's house, he ran over the stairs as if his life was in danger.

He began to knock, or better, to punch with all his strength on the door.

-Matt!- he cried while searching for the keys Matt'd given to him (well, actually Foggy had forced him to give) -Are you in there? Are you ok?-

He didn't really wait for the answer. He used the key and opened the door.

 _Please be on the floor_ half _dead. Please be here._

-Matt?- he called out several times, low at first, then louder. But the house seemed empty, without any sign of his friend or of potential injuries. No blood, no painkillers.

Then he saw the phone left on the couch, and he was caught by a rush of anger. He took it and literally smashed it against the wall.

-Dammit Murdock!-

He'd done it.

-Wake up, kid!-

* * *

A wave of icy water fell on him, giving him a rude awakening. He tried to get up, trembling with the cold, but Stick kicked him back against the pillow.

Matt wasn't ready and took the shot with a groan that was a mixture between pain and surprise.

Not that he hadn't expected some punishment after the way he had acted the night before, but nothing so sudden as that wake-up call.

-Wha...- this time he "saw" the attack coming and was able to avoid him jumping out of the bed with a spin.

-New rule, kid- Stick said in an angry voice, hitting him again, his movements too fast for a still half-asleep Matthew -When I decide to do something, you don't interfere! Am I understood?-

-You were going to kill that girl! She was innocent!-

-She saw you!-

-Yeah, she saw a man wearing a black mask. So what? She couldn't have recognized me!-

Stick hit him again in his stomach, then he used his body to block him on the ground in a really short time that didn't give Matt the time to react.

He found himself completely unable to move a single muscle, he could feel Stick's face near to his own. He forced himself to relax and stop fighting his mentor. He knew it was useless, besides, that damn water was so cold he wished he could have a hot shower as soon as possible, and that wasn't going to happen if he kept rebelling.

-Good kid- Stick said when he felt Matt surrender, but he didn't leave him -Now listen to me. We've made an agreement you wanted, and which I am respecting. You'd better start doing your part or I'll make you. Understood?-

 _Foggy. Karen. Danger._

-Stay away from them- the lawyer's voice was dangerously cold and calm, the kind of voice that hides an alarming lever of anger.

-Then obey, boy-

Stick finally let him go. Matt rose to his feet again and without a word closed himself into the bathroom. He was trembling with a dangerous cocktail of cold, fear, and anger.

Two days had passed since he and Stick had left Hell's Kitchen. Since then they'd had very little time to rest and he was beginning to feel really tired, his muscles got heavier hour by hour.

Matt had followed Stick in all his missions around all the New Jersey area, fighting under his orders without asking anything of him. He didn't really care. This wasn't his war.

All he wanted was to finish the job and go back home.

The night before, they prevented a cargo ship that would had taken off with 40 young girls on board.

There were 15 or maybe less; young, innocent children ready to be sent somewhere to be used as sex slaves. Their terror and desperation almost made Matt physically sick.

While Stick was taking care of those responsible of that crime, he'd suddenly heard a scream. He had run toward her, ignoring Stick commanding him to leave her.

From the tone of her scream and her heartbeat, he'd felt she had to be at least 13, she was lying on the ground, surrounded by three man touching her and trying to wrest her clothes off. The lawyer had heard her sobbing, fighting to avoid the violence with all her strength, but she was small. And alone.

Helpless.

Matt turned the water on and waited for it to becoming warm enough, then he let it flow over his tired body. He steadied himself on the wall, his eyes closed, while the hot water did its job. Slowly, he stopped shaking and somehow managed to relax.

-I'll give you the morning off- Stick said to him when he finally got out from the bathroom -We are leaving this city at 1 pm-

Matt nodded. He wasn't really happy about that. Having time to himself meant that he would have time to think about what he had left behind, and that wasn't good.

He needed some fresh air.

He dressed himself and took his cane, then he left the room he was sharing with Stick.

This wasn't New York. He didn't even know the name of this town. Stick hadn't told him and he hadn't asked. Quite simply, he didn't care.

* * *

-Did he phone you?-

Karen had started to ask the same damn question every morning since the day Matt had left.

Somehow, Foggy had managed to come up with a decent alibi for his friend's sudden absence.

He had told her Matt had called him while he was reaching his house, that he told him that a nurse from the orphanage was dying. She was one the few people who actually cared about him, so he'd left the town to visit her in Canada as soon as he received the phone call and he was going to stay with her until the end.

-Yeah- he lied (again).

-How is he?-

-You know him. He'd rather die than admit there was something wrong- he answered -I think he's handling the situation quite well. Maybe being Catholic is not so bad for him right now-

-Did you tell him that if he needs help he's just to call?-

-Of course I did. Now, let's get back to work. What do we have?-

But Foggy didn't really listen Karen talking about the agenda of the day. His thoughts were all about Matt since the day he hadn't found him at his place.

He'd watched all the television news and tried to read everything he could on the internet, trying to find out something about them, but whatever he and Stick were doing, they'd kept a very low profile.

 _Are you ok, buddy? Where are you?_


	5. False impressions don't speak

_PERSONAL SPACE_ : Here I am again with a new chapter. Thanks to everyone who read this and a special thanks to the onew who left a rewiev!

Special thanks, as usual, also to my fantastic beta **InsertImaginativeNameHere!**

Have a nice reading and let me know weather you like it or no, please!

* * *

 **Chapter 5: False impressions don't speak**

-Kill him, kid! Come on!- Stick ordered in an angry voice.

It was the fourth or maybe fifth time that Stick had given him that order in the last 5 minutes, and, not for the first time since he'd been away from Hell's Kitchen, he'd been tempted to obey.

It was the middle of the night, as usual, and it was raining. They all were soaked and tired, tired of this terrible night and Matt himself was tired of everything. He was fighting for something he didn't believe in, following orders from a man who didn't respect the way he used to when he was a boy, who treated him like a kid every time the lawyer made a personal decision about how to face situations.

Stick used to beat him as he did in the past, except now Matt was an adult, so the punishments were pretty much harder and more painful than when he was nine years old.

The bruises on his body weren't only due to the fights, right now.

This "man" was responsible for the murders of five children; the oldest, 15 years old, the youngest, only 5. All of them were sons or nephews of some politician from New Jersey, who both the Yakuza and the Triad (if Stick wasn't lying to him this time) wanted to control to gain power on the drug market of the State. Matt could barely think someone could be so cruel to kill without a real reason. They could have kidnapped these kids and blackmailed their fathers. No. They murdered them.

-Kill him! Now!- Stick's voice brought him back to reality.

This horrible man was completely in their power, in his power, actually; Matt was blocking him in a deadly grip, of a kind Stick had taught to him. He could end this person's life with only one, simple gesture, and he was really fighting with his own conscience to not follow his instinct, this time stronger than ever.

The idea of those children, killed by this guy's hands, was stuck in his mind, and it would be so easy to put an end to all this horror with a single movement of his arms.

 _You promised, Matthew_. Foggy's voice echoed in his head. _You are not crossing that line. There's the police for this. You are not God._

He stopped a moment before going through with the fatal gesture. Unfortunately, Stick didn't have his same sense of justice.

-Don't move!- He heard, at the same time as Stick said those words, the hiss of the arrow he'd loosed from his bow. He could do nothing but feel it hitting the man's throat. Stick knew very well that he would have done everything possible to save his prisoner's life, that's why he had spoken only after releasing the arrow. _Dammit,_ was all he could think. The man died a minute later.

Matt felt sick and he suddenly dropped the body he was still holding in his arms, only to turn the other way and throw up the pizza he had for dinner. It was too much for him to handle.

This was not justice.

Stick didn't give him time to regain control of his stomach. He basically took him by the arm and carried him away roughly.

The young lawyer could hear the police coming, and he realized they would soon find the five bodies of the children and the ones of the guilty. The accomplices were knocked out, and the officers would also find and send the young men to jail.

Matt wasn't really stable on his feet, so he let Stick drag him to their house in that town.

-You stupid, useless kid!- Stick rebuked him, throwing him away across the room. Matt knocked against the corner of the wardrobe with a groan of pain. He'd been hit during the mission, so the pain was even worse.

He was still feeling nauseous, his stomach was aching, and he was trembling with cold, but he knew what was coming.

He had felt his mentor's anger during their journey home, barely restrained under the mask of a good dad helping his sick child. Now they were alone, no one would see them, and he was going to release all his built-up rage. Matt prepared himself for the punishment.

Stick caught him with a kick, right where the center of most of his pain was. The shot was really bad, and it made Matt cry out. That didn't stop the old man, who kept beating him until the young man was at his limit.

-Get up!-

Matt tried to obey, but he simply couldn't, his body too weak to respond. He tried to lift with his shaking arms, but they failed him, and he fell on the floor again.

Stick hit him again.

-Get up!-

He failed a second time. Another rap reached his chest, he felt his body lift and roll on the ground. Now he was on his back, his hands on his stomach trying to protect himself.

-Get up!-

The lawyer shook his head, then he laid it on the ground, unable to move. Stick thumped him again and again and after every blow he repeated him the order. When he was tired of using his hands and feet, he began to hit him with his cane. Matt stopped even to try to protect himself.

The older man stopped only when Matt couldn't even moan anymore.

-The next time you don't carry out my orders, you will regret, kid.- He promised, then he left the young man lying on the floor, barely able to breathe.

Matt didn't answer. He coughed weakly a couple of times, and he tasted the metallic tang of blood while it spilled out from his mouth, then everything went black.

* * *

The young woman was going to the supermarket when she saw him.

 _That's impossible_. She told herself. _He's just a man wearing sunglasses. That's not him. Stop seeing him in every man you meet. He is in New York where you left him_.

But she couldn't avoid staring at that boy. That walk, the way he was limping, as if he was in considerable pain. She couldn't see his face and he wasn't carrying any cane with him, so she couldn't be sure. From behind, that guy totally looked like Matt. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a navy bomber.

With that outfit, sunglasses and without his cane, he looked just like any regular guy. Of course, she knew Matt used to act like any regular blind man, but she was sure that if he wanted, he could hide his disability because of his superpower.

She'd never seen him dressed like that. When he was at home, he used to wear sweatpants and t-shirt, and when he was out he usually wore his suits; black pants and jackets, white shirt and tie.

She tried to remember if she had ever seen jeans or that kind of coat in his wardrobe, but she couldn't.

The man entered in the small church in front of her.

She decided to go with her instinct and follow him.

* * *

When he returned to life, he could feel the warmth of the sun hitting his face. He was still in his black suit, lying on the floor where he'd passed out after Stick's treatment. His clothes were still wet, and he was shivering, frozen down to his bones.

He tried to move, when a rush of soreness caught him, making him almost cry out. Matt decided to move very slowly. He had to rise, to take care of his injuries and manage to put on some dry clothes.

It turned out that the only thing he could do was the first one, and not without some difficulties.

His chest ached like hell, mostly where Stick had hit him the night before. When he finally managed to sit down, the world of fire began to spin, almost making him vomit again.

Somehow, he could stand up, grabbing the table to not fall down. He took some deep breaths to calm down and hauled himself to the couch to think.

He was reaching the limit.

Stick had no mercy at all, and every night Matt was forced to watch people die, and they weren't always guilty. His former mentor had the very deplorable habit of killing whoever saw them.

He had discovered, some days afterwards, that he'd killed the young girl Matt had saved the first week of their new forced partnership. He couldn't do or say anything about that. He was too cowardly, too afraid for his family's safety to dare face Stick, and beyond that, it was too late. She was already gone.

This situation was killing him from the inside.

Being Daredevil could be difficult sometimes; he had seen lots of terrible things in his crusade against Fisk.

He had thought to have seen the worst with the Chinese who were blinded for their work with pure drugs, but what Stick had done this time was even worse, because it was done without reason.

When he first met Claire, he said to his prisoner he enjoyed hurting people, but they were just words, he wanted to scare him to force him to obey. Stick actually had fun when he was torturing someone, Matt could smell, hear and feel his satisfaction, and that was terrible.

Even punishing him didn't really make much sense. He was a man now, and he was used to beatings, he wasn't scared by blows and he wouldn't change his stance on killing because of some knocks.

Stick didn't do that to punish him, no; it was his way to relax.

Matt wasn't really happy about it, but if he didn't submit, the next punch bag could be Foggy.

He needed to get out, to take a breath of fresh air.

That was easier said than done.

He tried to change his clothes, but he barely could walk, and the black mask suit he was wearing was so wet that the cotton of the light, black sweater was clinging to him, and when he'd tried to pull it off, the world around him began to spin again and he'd almost fallen down.

Somehow he managed to change his trousers for a pair of jeans he had bought a day or so before. He didn't like wearing them very much, his skin (made more sensitive because of the accident that took his sight away) always had a sort of allergic reaction, but he couldn't find anything better, at least not with the money he had with him, anyway.

He covered the sweater with a jacket and went out, without bothering to check for Stick. If he was at home, he was probably sleeping, or meditating. If he was out... well, Matt really didn't care.

After half an hour, he finally reached a church. He didn't know where he was exactly, maybe Boston, but he wasn't sure and he couldn't walk for too long, so he had taken a cab that left him half a mile away from a church settled in a pedestrian zone. He had spent half of the small amount he had left. He didn't care. He needed to stay alone for a while, in a safe place, where even Stick would not dare to hurt him. He felt sick only thinking about the distance, but he needed somewhere to confess.

Well, not exactly.

What he'd really wanted was to go back to Hell's Kitchen even just for a minute. Check if Foggy, Karen and everyone he cared about was ok and breathe his polluted air, smelling the mixture of stinks and perfumes typical of his neighborhood.

He wanted to go home.  
While he was slowly walking toward the church, lost in his thoughts about home, for a while he considered to buy a burner and call Foggy, even to listen his voicemail. He needed to hear the familiar voice of his partner. His friend would probably curse him even in punjabi, but he wouldn't care, he knew that despite everything, Foggy would be happy too.  
He was starting doing calculations about how much that would cost, when he suddenly was afraid. Matt was reaching his limit, his nostalgia was stronger than ever. Probably the last time he felt like that was after his father's funeral.

He understood that if he had called Foggy, that could mean his final collapse. He would not manage to keep going on. So, for once, he chose the easy way, the selfish one, and he pushed the idea back.

When he entered the church, he could smell the familiar scent of incense and burning candles.

That gave him the illusion of being at home, that Father Lantom would approach him with a smile, ready to offer him a latte, the consolation of a confession, and the thing that was most important to Matt; the word of a friend.

He felt his eyes becoming full with tears, but somehow he could hold on, somehow. He knew that there was nothing wrong in crying, but if he surrendered now, desperation would overcome him and destroy all his strength.

Approaching the altar, he sat himself on a pew, unable to stand for even a second longer. He felt pain in every muscle he could and couldn't feel. The wood was warm and reassuring to his touch.

He closed his eyes, thinking about home, about Claire taking care of him every time he needed, even when he didn't deserve it.

If he focused enough, he almost could smell Claire's perfume as if she were right next to him; he imagined hearing her light steps while she was in his apartment. He could almost physically feel her hand catching his gently and he couldn't avoid thinking about how strange the human heart could be. Of all the people he loved, he was thinking about the one he knew for sure he had lost, maybe forever. He had screwed everything up with her, and she had made very clear that she would only be his nurse when he needed her, nothing more, and listening to her heartbeat he had heard she meant it.

He felt so homesick that his brain was making a perfect image of the girl approaching him and touching his hand. Nostalgia worked in a very strange way, making the unreal real.

-Matt...-

Wait... false impressions didn't speak, did they?

* * *

She entered the church some seconds after him, but she didn't face him directly. She wanted to be sure, so she walked through the aisle, at his left. She watched him sitting and a few steps later she was finally able to see his face.

 _Oh my God. It's him._

And...were those tears?

 _Matt…_

No matter what happened (or more accurately, not happened) between them, she had regretted her own words as soon as she had time for thinking about them. She had left New York with a heavy heart, fearing that what she had told him could lead Matt to do something stupid. Now he was here, sitting in some kind of physical and psychological pain, and, despite everything, she couldn't leave him alone.

Claire turned back and slowly she sat next to him, alarmed by his lack of reaction. She knew he could hear sounds and smells literally some blocks away, and she had no doubt he'd heard her moves or her perfume. Why wasn't he reacting? Don't be stupid, do you really think he could remember it?

 _What's wrong with you, Matt?_

She slowly slid nearer to him, until she could take his hand, gently, without abrupt movements.

-Matt...- she whispered when he didn't react even to that. -Matt, what's wrong?-

* * *

-Matt, what's wrong?-

He opened his eyes, a pretty useless gesture considering he couldn't see, but the voice seemed so real that he instinctively looked at her, as if he could actually see her face and be sure she wasn't a dream.

He turned towards the whisper with a start. Her perfume, the softness of her touch, the kindness in her voice. The unique rhythm of her heart, which he'd memorized, all forming a rough shape made of flames in his mind. Her face didn't have defined features but he knew her immediately. _Claire._

She was real.

She was here.

 _No. No._

* * *

He'd recognized her. She had seen him relax for a second after she'd spoken, but then he'd suddenly pushed her away as if she were the enemy.

-Matt- she whispered, grabbing his arms -Matt. It's me. It's Claire-

-No. No- he was trying to break himself free from her hold. She wasn't so strong, but he didn't manage to get loose, even if she wasn't really fighting to keep him.

-Matt. Matt, please. Calm down-

-Go away, Claire. Stay away from me- his voice was so low and desperate she barely could understand what he was trying to say. -Stay...away. Please, Claire, please-

As a reaction, Claire let go of his arms only to hold him tight, ignoring his words and his attempts to push her away from him. He was trembling, and soon he stopped to fight, losing himself in her hug. He began to sob, then he burst into desperate tears.

-Matt...- she whispered his name, hugging him tighter. She let him hide his face in the socket of her neck, his tears were dampening her t-shirt, but she didn't care. She'd never seen the Devil of Hell's Kitchen like this before, and it was something she had never thought could happen.

-Matt...- she repeated quietly, trying to make her voice sound soft and sweet, as if she was comforting a frightened child. -Ssh...it's ok, Matt. Everything is gonna be fine. I'm with you. I'm here...-

* * *

Matt really wanted to stop crying like a baby.

Matt really wanted to push her away.

Matt really wanted to keep her out of danger.

But all he could do was stay in her embrace, let her hold him tight, listen to her heart beating under her t-shirt and to her soft voice whispering reassuring words into his ear, smell her perfume. She _smelled like_ home.

She _was_ home.

Slowly, he tried to control his emotions. His sobs began to slow down and somehow he stopped crying, even if he couldn't quite hold back all of his tears. He raised his head and freed himself.

-Are you ok?- she whispered, her voice revealing how worried she was about his emotive collapse, but also relieved now that he was himself again.

He nodded.

Wrong move.

His head began to spin, and, once again he could barely hold back the nausea.

-Whoa. Easy, Matt. Easy- her voice was the sweetest sound in the world.

She grabbed him by the shoulders and helped him lay down on the pew, his head resting on his legs. She unzipped his jacket to let him breathe easily...and she found the wet black sweater.

Again, he tried to revolt against her, but she ignored him.

-God, Matt. You're soaked! Are you trying to get sick? Let's get out of here. You need help-

-No... No, Claire. You have to to...stay away...from me. He's gonna hurt you-

-Who?-

-We... we made a deal... I... I have to... obey... Foggy... - he started saying disconnected words. He wanted to say so many things that everything was getting confused inside. His head kept spinning, he felt as though he were losing consciousness and he fought to stay awake.

He needed air.

He'd wanted to go home.

He'd wanted to stay in her arms forever.

-Matt. Matt. Listen to my voice. Focus on me, can you do that?- Claire's voice was still low and sweet, but now there was a point of roughness in it, something that forced him to listen to her. -Matt. Focus. On. Me.-

He lifted his head toward the direction of her voice, where he knew her eyes were. He heard her take the glasses from his face and gently dry his tears. He was nearly calm right now, even if he was still shaking like a leaf.

-Matt...-

-Claire... please. Go away- he begged.

-Not a chance-

-If he...-

-We'll figure out something, like... -she tried to think of something credible -you were here and you passed out, so I took you to the ER and then to my place-

-He... knows...your perfume. He smelled it... in my home-

-Then I'll change it- she resolved. -Now we are taking a cab, you'll calm down and let me help you, ok?-

-What if I say no?-

-I'll call 911- and to prove that she took her phone from the pocket of her trousers out and started the call, knowing perfectly well Matt would hear everything.

He was still, as if he'd known she would never do that for real, but he suddenly grabbed her arm when the operator answered and she began to talk.

-No. No, please- He begged.

She put the call on stand-by mode.

-Then you do as I say-

Matt was defeated. He nodded. She hung up the phone and led him to her place.


	6. You'll wish I killed you yesterday

**_PERSONAL SPACE_** : Here I am with a new chapter... Thank everyone for reading this.

I want to give a special thank to **goldacharmed** and **zoepeyja** who lef me a review! I'm sorry I haven't written you back so far, but I am studying for my exams at university and I have few time, but I will soon, I promise!

Thanks to the 22 and 13 of you who put this into followed and favourite lists, too!

Special thank to my beta **InsertImaginativeNameHere** for the great job she is doing me, for her patience, and for listening to my ravings!

* * *

 _ **Chapter 6: You'll wish I Killed You Yesterday**_

* * *

Matt was still trembling

Claire could feel the spasms of his hand as she held it in hers.

They were in the cab that was bringing them to the apartment she had rented when she'd left New York. Her blind friend was sitting motionless by her side, apparently perfectly calm, acting as if he were just her boyfriend and they were simply going home. Whatever the cause of that was, it wasn't only psychological. She could tell that his nerves were completely under control, and that if he really wanted, he could stop the shivering. Maybe it was just the wet sweater he was wearing... but if he'd changed his trousers and shoes, why not replace the t-shirt too? Was he hurt somewhere on his chest?

And what was he doing here? So far away from Hell's Kitchen? Why wasn't he wearing the red suit she'd read in the newspaper about? And who had he made a deal with? What was the connection with Foggy?

 _Not now, Claire._ _He needs you, not your questions._

She looked at him, gently caressing his hand with her thumb.

She tried to keep her face neutral, so he wouldn't notice she was trying to gauge how bad his condition was. He was pale and from the lack of movement and the small grimace he made when the car hit a pothole, she assumed he was hurt somewhere and he was struggling very hard to hide it.

He held on until they reached her house, then, the moment she left him to open the door, he let himself slide along the wall until he found himself sat down on the floor, as if he were too tired to stand for another second.

-Matt!- she crouched beside him.

-I... fine- The words came out weakly, and they were the only ones he needed to make himself clear, as if talking required energy supplies he didn't have. Jesus.

-My ass you are- she couldn't restrain herself from saying, probably more rude than she had wanted to sound. No time to be sorry, said her inner voice, while she was helping him to stand. He tried to help her, looking for a hold on the wall to lift himself. He couldn't find anything, but tried anyway to not put all his weight on her shoulder. She kicked the door to fully open it and somehow helped him to the couch.

She was happy to see his sigh of relief and the first concrete signal of relaxation while he was closing his eyes. She softly moved a stray hair from his forehead, trying to make him feel safe, her left hand still holding his. He was squeezing it quite hard, but not so much too hurt her, as if holding it could reassure him she was real.

-Don't move, Matt- she murmured before leaving to reach her bedroom. She felt a sudden tension in him, like he were afraid she would disappear if he let her go. -I'll be right back- she said, mostly to keep him calm and prevent him from getting up to look for her.

A moment later, when she came back with a sweatshirt that could suit him, she found him asleep.

She smiled, and felt very guilty about waking him, but she couldn't leave him wearing that wet thing.

She shook him awake gently. He moaned and grabbed her hand with a start, his eyes suddenly wide open, his muscles tensed ready to attack. Not to attack, she realized after a bit. The other hand, was not trying to hit her; he was keeping it near to his body, between his head and his chest, as if he wanted to be ready to protect himself.

That attitude worried her a lot. She knew from experience it was an half unconscious gesture, but back in New York, his instinct had always been to be the first to strike, not to defend.

 _What the hell happened to you, Matty?_

-Easy. It's me, Matt- The sound of her voice and her hand taking his one were enough for him to relax a little bit, the minimum to stop himself from intercepting every her gesture, so she took the chance to examine him. -I need you to help me. Can you do that for me?-

He simply nodded, and the way he did it, as if he were doing the most intense, strenuous activity in the world, revealed how weak he was. She wondered where he had taken the strength to react when she had woken him from. The answer came by itself: fear.

What or who in the world could scare the man without fear to death?

She threw the question out of her mind. Matt needs you as a nurse right now. She told herself for the second time that day, and after that she focused on the young man laying on her couch.

She helped him to sit and lowed his jacket zip, then she made him take it off. He groaned in pain, so she tried to be as delicate as possible, not just so she didn't hurt him.

-I'm going to take this sweater off, ok Matt? I want to check you, plus, it's soaked through, you must be freezing- she explained. She knew this wasn't really necessary, she had never done that before with him, but she wanted him to be aware of what was going to happen. It usually worked with patients in shock after some accidents.

-Yeah...a little- he managed to muster up a half smile for her, one of those adorable puppy smiles that would prevent anyone's anger. She couldn't avoid smiling back, softly gracing his cheek in a soft caress.

-Relax, ok?-

-Please... soft. Hurts... hell- he begged, and the fact that he was asking for something for the first time since they had met alarmed her. He could normally bear sorrow in a way that seemed inhuman to her.

And she did it.

-God- she couldn't stop from jumping when she saw his chest's condition. -How the hell...-

-Long story- he cut in, his voice broken with pain, his shiver stronger now that he was half naked.

She made him wear the warmest and biggest sweatshirt she'd found (probably it was one of the ones Mike'd left in her wardrobe, she have must taken it without thinking, but now she was grateful she had). It was a thick, dark gray plush shirt, with a zip and a hood.

She pulled his arms into the sleeves and put the hood over his head to keep him warm. He was trying to grab the two sides of the zip to close it, but Claire stopped him putting her hand gently on his fingers..

-I'm sorry, Matt. I know you are cold, but I have to check you over-

-I'm...fine- he muttered, fighting with himself to stay awake -Just... bruises. Probably... one or two... damaged ribs. He...didn't...want..to kill...me-

-He didn't?-

He shook his head very slowly.

-Just...punish...Need... to rest... please...wake me...an hour...gotta...back... please..-

He was losing consciousness, his shaking very visible right now. She helped him with the zip, fastening it to cover also his neck. He let himself falling on the couch and a second later he was already sleeping. If they were only brushes... they could wait. But why was he in such pain then? _Oh, yes,_ she reminded to herself, _he has his own idea of "just bruises", and you won't find it in any medical manual._

She covered him with a fleece blanket and let him rest.

It was the best thing to do. Maybe when he would wake up, he would be more calm and she would be able to check him over, wearing down his resistance.

She didn't wake him up after an hour. Not after two or three, either.

Claire just let him sleep. Actually, a couple of times she froze for a moment, watching him carefully. He was so deep in sleep he hadn't moved a single muscle for long enough to make her wonder if he was still alive.

She found out he was.

His breathing was regular, his face hidden under the hood, his body huddled up on himself under the blanket to prevent heat loss. He wasn't trembling anymore, and that made her feel better, maybe it had just been the exhaustion.

* * *

Matt wasn't at home.

Stick knew it the moment he reached the door of their apartment. This time his mission would have taken more time, so instead of a cheap motel, Stick had decided to rent a small apartment in Boston, not far from the MIT, one of the most important Engineering school in the world. When he had left the house that morning, Matt was still unconscious on the floor where he had last seen him time the night before. Stick had checked to make sure he hadn't killed him, then he had gone out to finish the part of the job that could be done in the sunlight.

Usually, when he had such things to do, he let that damn kid have the day off, with a double purpose; he could work without Matt chattering about stupid things like morality and justice and that altar boy could go to the church and pray for his soul. For Stick religions (all of them) were just a pile of bullshit made to control normal people's behavior in the name of some God with the threat of some Divine punishment. He had never understood why his best pupil (because the lawyer really was the most talented soldier he had ever found) insisted on so much of that kind of crap, but he had noticed that after the church he was less of a pain in the ass, so Stick let him do whatever he wanted.

The old blind man had been aware from the beginning he hadn't got full control of Matt anymore, but still he wasn't worried about a possible escape: the guy was a man of honor, and a lawyer; they had made a deal and Stick was absolutely sure Matt would respect it, if not for loyalty for his friend's sake; besides, until he would obey orders, he didn't give a shit.

He opened the door and found confirmation about what he had felt from the outside; no one was at home.

Stick sighed and undressed himself, he couldn't stand the smell of his own clothes for a minute more, the scent of blood he could smell coming from his hands.

He needed a shower to blur it away and, after that, meditation. Lot of meditation, or the next time he really could kill Matthew.

It was almost midnight, and Matt hadn't come home yet, and Stick was beginning to get angry. Still he was sure the lawyer hadn't gone away forever. His cane and all his stuff were already here, including his Bible, the one Jack Murdock gave to him when he began Sunday school (he knew because a young Matt told him some days after he had left St. Agnes with him), so wherever he was right now, he was planning to come back.

Stupid, emotional kid!

Stick sighed and slipped into a light meditation to calm down. He had a mission tonight and he had to accomplish it alone because of that pussy.

 _When you come back, kid, you'll wish I killed you yesterday. I promise._

* * *

Claire had stayed with Matt as long as she could keep her eyes open. At 1am he was still sleeping on her couch, apparently deaf to everything around him, but for about an hour it wasn't the same sleep he had before.

Earlier he was perfectly still, almost completely relaxed, his breaths slow and regular, his shaking had stopped completely; now he was getting upset, his body was making convulsive movements as if he were fighting against something or someone, the hood fell down revealing his face; he was sweating, mumbling about something in such a low tone she couldn't take a single word.

The nurse was aware what the risks of waking him up were, she and Foggy had experienced the consequences, but she had no choice; he was panicking inside his own dream (or nightmare, or whatever it was).

She got closer and carefully but resolutely squeezed his shoulder, shaking it to wake him up. She was expecting his start, so she was fast, faster as she had ever thought she could be, in order to slip away from his semi-unconscious move to trap her.

-Matt- she called out, his voice sweet but loud enough to reach him -Matt. It's me. It's Claire-

* * *

Since he was with Stick, rough starts were become routine. The old blind man always had something to punish him for. Though he wasn't the kind of good boy who always obeyed, this time he wasn't so sure he had deserved it.

-Matt. It's me. It's Claire-

He froze hearing his friend's voice. What the hell?

 _Calm down, Matt_. Apparently Foggy's voice in his brain was more awake than his brain itself. _Rewind. Play forward._

Images of the last few hours came to his mind, refreshing his still sleeping memory.

 _See? Everything's ok, you paranoid._ When exactly his conscience had begun to have Foggy's voice?

No. Nothing was ok.

He sat down on the couch.

-What time is it?- he asked in greeting, turning his head in the direction he felt Claire was. Sleep had been a real blessing. Although he hadn't made a full recovery yet, now he was strong enough to speak and move without so much trouble.

-It's the middle of the night- she explained, and he heard her light steps come toward him. Matt heard her crouching now she was close, he could feel the heat of her body and smell the freshness of her toothpaste (a particular mix of berries and mint) while she was speaking to him. She gently took his hand and at the same time moved his hair from his forehead, a gesture that immediately made him feel safe. She was moving slowly, not only to avoid scaring him, he suddenly understood: she was tired. -You were having a nightmare, I think.-

-I've told you to wake me in an hour... -

-Yeah... and since when did I do what you say, Matt?- He couldn't avoid lifting his lips in a soft smile, before trying to stand up, even if a part of him wanted to stay on that couch so much, as near as possible to Claire and her sweetness. He could never have her, he knew that, so he suppressed that part. He couldn't stay here, anyway. The longer he remained, the more the possibilities of Stick hurting Foggy increased. His head began to spin as soon as he managed to stand, but he ignored it, even if the world on fire around him for a bit seemed more like a sea. A sea in a storm, judging from the waves.

 _It's not the world, you idiot! It's you!_

 _Shut up, Foggy-Bear!_

-Where do you think you are going, exactly?-

-Gotta go-

-Where?-

-Gotta go- he repeated, stubborn -There's no time-

-Ok... see you, Matt. Be careful-

* * *

One thing she had learnt in those months of stitching up Matt Murdock, a.k.a. Daredevil; he was probably the most stubborn guy in the world.

The nurse stood up with him, leaving his hand the moment he released the contact between their skins.

Claire watched him swaying across the room, waiting for the moment he would fall down (because he surely would).

She didn't stop him when he declared he wanted to leave.

Words were useless when he was in what she called "the man in the mask" mode (she probably would have to switch it in "daredevil" mode now the papers had re-named him), so she let his body the time to make his mind understand that if he really wanted to do something, he would have to find a way to divide his soul from his walking corpse, because it was not going to follow him.

Ten (if he were a regular guy, she would have started from three, but this was Matt so...)

Matt was taking the first step toward a direction that would lead him directly into the wall. She didn't say a single world, and she didn't feel guilty about it.

Nine.

 _Dammit_.

She saw him understand he was making a mistake and turn around looking for something that could show him the way. She was expecting him to ask for help, already knowing he wouldn't.

Eight.

He eventually found the right way, and began to walk in the right direction.

Seven.

The first trip over his own feet.

Six.

Another one.

Five.

One more.

 _Oh, come on!_

Four.

Matt began to stagger and he moved his hands in front of himself, trying to reach for a wall or something that would help him to stand. He found a chair.

Three.

Somehow, he managed to open the door.

Two.

The stairs were so close, maybe one or two steps away from him.

 _No. No. Please. Please. Please. Fall down. Before the stairs, preferably._

One.

She couldn't feel terrible for her sigh of relief when Matt finally gave up and let his body be in charge of his movements. Luckily, it was smarter than his owner.

 _Dammit, Matthew. Some day I'm gonna kill you._

She sighed again before reaching for him and taking him by his arms to pull him back inside the house.

All alone, Claire wasn't able to lift him onto the couch again, he was too heavy for her and she had nothing to help her moving his body. She looked at the young lawyer. He was unconscious, but his breathing was fast and he was beginning to sweat, as if he had just finished a long run.

-Hold on, Matt- she whispered, before leaving him. She locked the door and went to her small bedroom. It had a double bed, but it was formed by two single mattresses. Claire worked fast, unmaking it and throwing the sheets away. Somehow, he moved one of the two of them in the living room where Matt was lying. She couldn't lift him, but she hoped she could make him roll over it, helping herself with a soft blanket. -Sorry, Matty. This is gonna hurt, but I can't leave you here-

He moaned in pain when she made him roll from the floor to the mattress, using all her weight to squash it in order to make it as tiny as possible. Eventually, he was more comfortable than before, even if he didn't look better.

 _Stay calm, Claire. You've just tossed him a lot._ She told herself. _Leave him rest for a while._

The nurse inside her was definitely right, so the girl listened to her. She covered him again and sat on the couch.

Maybe she could rest a little bit, too. Just five minutes.

* * *

A sunbeam hitting her right eye suddenly woke her up. Wait. In her apartment the sun wasn't visible until... _shit._

She sat up on her couch with a start, her neck and back aching because of the position in which she had fallen asleep, half sitting half lying between the arm and the backrest of the sofa. She cursed herself and began to move very slowly, nibbling her lips to not moan with sorrow. Soon things went better, and her first thought was for the man she was taking care of.

God.

Matt was still unconscious, or maybe just asleep, she couldn't tell for sure, but his condition was much worse than the night before. His shivering had started again and he was equally sweating. The lawyer had thrown the blanket away from him, his breaths were fast and a little irregular.

This wasn't good. At all.

* * *

It was already noon, and still no sign of Matt.

Stick knew that the moment he woke up after having a full night out.

If that kid wanted to test his patience, he was failing massively.

He got up in anger and went to his former pupil's room, trying to find out if he had at least come home to change his clothes. Everything was exactly how the lawyer left two nights before, except for a pair of jeans and a jacket. There was no fresh scent of him in the apartment, so he guessed Matt had taken them before leaving the day before.

Also his black mask and boots had seemingly gone with him. Was he playing the lone vigilante again helping poor people in danger?

He didn't matter.

His patience wore off. It was time to show that kid he wasn't joking.


	7. Mr Murdock is out right now

**PERSONAL SPACE** : Thanks to everyone who read, followed, favourited this, and thanks once again to my beta InsertImaginativeNameHere!

Happy reading and please, please, please, let me know what you think about this, it means a lot to me!

* * *

 _ **Chapter 7: Mr. Murdock is out right now**_

* * *

One month.

One damn month had passed since that damn day.

Foggy could count every second of that period, in which he had to keep doing his job and fake with Karen that everything was all right, that Matt was regularly calling him and that he was fine instead of doing what his soul was screaming at him to; he wanted to rent (or maybe even buy) a car and get away from Hell's Kitchen, traveling through the Unites States until he found his best friend.

 _Then what, smartass?_ Wonderful, now his brain sounded like Matt Murdock (the good student version).

 _I'm gonna kick your ass until we come back to Hell's Kitchen, and I will probably keep on doing that even afterwards!_ He responded to himself in anger due to how worried he was for Matt.

 _Dammit, Murdock._

The truth was that the blond lawyer had tried everything to get some news about his friend, without any results of any kind (if he had, he really would have rented that car).

He was checking every morning the lists of people who had been arrested in every State of the USA, hoping,or maybe not, he wasn't really sure, to find Matt's name or some fake ID that would ring a bell, because he was sure that if he'd needed some legal help, Matt would have found a way to let him know.

He was also reading the newspaper every day, as well as trawling the internet but still, nothing.

No news? good news! His grandfather used to say. It was the translation of an Italian motto that a friend of his used to say and its meaning was that not having news was still better than bad news. It could even be true, when your best friend was not a crazy blind vigilante with the bad habit of turning up half dead in the strangest and darkest places on Earth.

When the phone rang, Foggy was working on a new case, that he hadn't still decided whether to take or not, because he couldn't really tell if she was telling the truth or if she was hiding something.

Even if Matt was missing, he was trying to do his best to follow the line they drew when they had opened the firm, as he'd wanted. The only problem was that without his best friend's superpower things it had become a fair bit harder.

Not that he was really paying attention to his job, but he had to pretend everything was all right, and focusing on something real was still better than focusing on maintaining a pretence.

Karen was in the nearest room to the door, the one they used as a reception, when the call came in. She picked up, and for a second Foggy hoped to hear her greeting Matt.

He realized only in that moment that he had taken this attitude every time the firm's phone rang, and that when was his personal phone ringing, he always hoped to see an unknown number on the screen.

So far, it hadn't happened yet, and that was the worst thing.

Foggy would had given anything for a message, a call, an e-mail, a smoke signal, a flare, a carrier pigeon, something that would tell him his best friend was still alive. He didn't care if and how badly he might be hurt. Alive was more than enough.

-Nelson & Murdock- he heard her speak. -Yes. Just a minute.-

A second later, his secretary entered his office. -Can you take a call, Foggy?-

-Sure. Who is it?-

-She didn't tell me, but it seems quite serious-

-Ok. I'll take that from here. Thank you, Karen-

The girl smiled at him and went back to her desk. On her way, she went by Matt's office. Foggy saw the sad look in her eyes and his heart sank, even if he was relieved she didn't know the truth. She would be destroyed.

 _Let's hope she never discovers us, Matty, or we will be the ones who get destroyed. By her._

He sighed, then picked up the phone.

-Franklin Nelson-

-Foggy... It's Claire-

Foggy froze for a moment, fearing she was making that call to tell him his friend was dying, or worse, already dead, then remembered that she hadn't been in New York lately, she was probably just looking for Matt.

-Yes. It's just me right now.- he answered, pretending she was just someone calling for information -Mr. Murdock is out right now, but you can ask me anything you want, or you can fix an appointment with our secretary-

-Can't you talk?-

-Exactly... yes-

-Matt is with me- now Foggy had really frozen, a shiver ran down his spine. _Please, don't be dead, not even close to that, please, Matty._

-Can you explain me what happened?- he inquired, pretending he wasn't panicking inside.

-I don't know. I met him by chance. He was completely tired out and he had an emotional collapse. He's having lucidity problems, and for the most of time he doesn't even recognize me. Now he's sleeping on my couch, and he seems quiet.-

-Where do you live?-

-Boston, near to the West Campus of Boston University.-

Boston? What the hell were they doing in Boston?

-Ok, Mrs...- he was trying to find a fake last name for her, but all he could think was those two words: emotional collapse. He hadn't even known that Matt could have one, and in all those years, his mind had made up for him number of accidents involving his blind friend he could almost write a medical TV show based on them.

-Oh...ehm... Carter.- she helped him, and he tried to find some good news from her quiet and calm tone. She didn't seem upset, not so much, anyway, so Daredevil was probably not going to die.

-Ok, Mrs. Carter, I'll do some research and I'll call you later, ok?-

-Ok, Foggy. See you later-

-Stay calm and try to pick up all the information we need. Agreed?-

-Thanks. Bye-

He had to find a way to be alone. Now.

That was the first thing Foggy thought after hanging up the phone, but he soon realized that if Matt was out cold, maybe she wouldn't have other information beside what she'd already told him, so he forced himself to stay focused on his job.

 _Clients come first_.

 _Shut up, Murdock! You are sleeping on a fucking couch in Boston!_

But the Matt in his head was fully right. Being in his office, waiting without saying anything was useless. He had to do that, to find out if this guy was innocent and do all he could to free him from all the charges.

For Matt.

 _Move your ass, Foggy-Bear._

 _Shut up, Little Horn!(1) I'm really pissed off with you right now._

* * *

She had to admit that; she had been amazed by Foggy's reaction.

When he'd called her, that night he'd found Matt almost dead in his apartment, she had the impression he was a fully emotive person, without any shred of self control (at least when his best friend was involved), but not today.

Actually, he'd been quite smart, pretending she was a client and making her talk without raising the suspicions of anyone listening.

She had decided to call him when she saw Matt's condition getting worse hour after hour. For all the time, she didn't stop checking him in a way that could be called paranoid, but that was the first time she had seen him like that. From what she could distinguish from a safe distance, he was running a temperature, but what it was caused by, she couldn't find out.

She was thinking about some inflammation due to the large amount of bruises on his body, still waiting their turn to be treated, and that was the best of the myriad possibilities. Claire also thought about some internal damage, but until he stopped trying to hit her every time she came close to him, she couldn't check him over better.

The nurse had already made an attempt to calm him down, but everything she tried was useless, and also speaking to him didn't seem to work either. Matt wasn't so much aware of what he was doing to her, he didn't even recognize her voice, so she couldn't really blame him for that, but at the moment her best shot was to restrain him with something, not that she really wanted to. Actually, only thinking of doing something like that to him, now that he was so scared (because every time she felt nothing but fear in him), made her feel physically sick, but she also knew he needed medical help as soon as possible, one way or another. No doubt on that.

Before making that quite extreme step, she had decided to give him one last chance, and for that reason she picked up the phone and called his best friend. If even Foggy's voice wouldn't calm him, then she would be forced to tie him down.

Anyway, she didn't wake him up during the call with Foggy. Every minute of consciousness was precious because of his weakness, besides, she didn't want to scare Foggy more than was inevitable. She wanted to prepare Matt's partner for that before putting him on the phone with a half conscious Daredevil. He deserved to know, and she wasn't sure he would recognize him otherwise.

 _It's not so easy being your friend, Matt, is it?_ She thought, not only thinking about the blond lawyer, but also about herself.

She had promised herself that she wouldn't fall in love with that blind guy who ran around beating people up dressed in a mask. She had thought he was without scruples, a mad guy without a soul who wanted to play God, and from the lack of reaction when she'd told him that, she had convinced herself he genuinely didn't care about anyone else.

But now, after seeing him that way, the desperation in his tears, the way he'd clasped her tight while she was hugging him in that church and how much her single touch was able to calm him down almost instantaneously (when he was lucid enough to pay attention), all those things had revealed her how much he cared about people he'd loved. How much he cared about her.

She smiled at him, even if he couldn't see her.

* * *

Matt woke up while she was cooking some pasta for dinner, after he'd slept the whole afternoon. The way he moved, as if he was confused about what had happened some hours before made her stop doing that to reach for him on the couch, or at least try to do exactly that.

-Matt- she called, touching him slightly on his arm, but still ready to jump as far away as possible from his dangerous hands. -It's ok. It's ok. It's me. It's Claire-

-Claire?- he repeated, the first spark of reason after hours of pure delirium -Why are you here? How did he find you?- he was starting to get upset, again, but she tried to resist, using the fact that this time, at least, he had recognized her; she took his hands firmly, struggling to hold him tight despite his bids to free himself from her grab.

-Calm down, Matt. It's me. It's me. It's ok.- She kept repeating those words through all her battle against his terror and confusion.

Matt managed to hit her once or twice, but he was so frail that he couldn't hurt her, luckily; if he were at the best of his shape, she would probably be against the wall right now. Eventually, his strengths ran out, and he stopped fighting her. When he finally surrendered, she couldn't avoid sighing with relief.

-Nobody's found me- she said near to his ear, her lips almost touching it, her voice low to force him to focus only on her. -We met at the church. Do you remember?-

* * *

And hour had passed, slowly, definitely too slowly, and Foggy found himself looking at the clock more or less every thirty seconds, his mind stuck on his best friend, somewhere in Boston, afflicted with only God knew what.

 _Fog, I'm ok. I'm safe_. Wonderful, now his brain _was_ Matt Murdock - again.

 _My ass you are!_

-Foggy?- he suddenly came back to reality. Karen was on the door, her right shoulder and head resting on the jamb.

-Yes?-

-It's everything ok?- she looked so concerned he felt queasy at the idea of lying to her one more time.

-Yeah.- he forced himself to speak normally -I'm only a little tired. Don't worry-

-Are you sure?- she didn't seem convinced. He nodded.

-Too much work. It's not so easy without Matt. He is damn good-

Karen smiled and entered in his office.

-You are as good as him. Your only problem is you don't believe in yourself-

-I'm not like him-

-Yes, you are. Remember how scary you were when we went to see Marci for Mrs. Cardenas? And you kicked her ass-

Foggy smiled. It was a total different life. A life in which his best friend was a regular blind guy, and his worst fear was to find him fallen down in an open manhole.

-Yeah... I did...-

The office main door opening interrupted their chat, giving him the chance to avoid finishing the line (because actually he had absolutely no idea on how to finish it). Karen smiled one last time then went back to welcome the new guest.

-Good morning, sir.-

-Good morning- that voice was enough to scare Foggy. For a moment he was paralyzed with terror. That man could cause Matt to have a panic attack. Without him, if he decided to kill them, they would be dead for sure.

 _Foggy. Think._ Ok, his brain was starting to be annoying with this "Matt-voice" thing. But it was right. He had to think, to stay calm.

 _Good. What is your priority?_

 _Save your ass, Little Horn._

 _Come on. You can be better than this. Try again._

 _Try to not get killed by that crazy man?_

 _Better. Try again._

What? Wait... _Karen!_

 _That's my Foggy-Bear!_

He had to keep Karen safe, and that made him able to walk again. He wasn't Matt, but he knew he had to do his best to not put her in danger.

-Is Mr. Murdock here?- Stick was asking her. Of course he was looking for Matt.

-I'm afraid Mr. Murdock is not here at the moment.-

-When can I find him?-

-I'm... actually, we don't know. He has taken some personal time and we don't know when he is coming back yet-

-Oh, I see.- that Stick was a good actor, Foggy had to admit that, trying not to think that he was probably listening to her heart to detect lies. It was lucky she didn't know the truth. -I heard he is blind... and I hoped he could help me with a case-

-We can take care of you, if you like- The blond lawyer picked up some courage and step into the room from his office. -I'm Franklin Nelson and if you have a problem we'll be glad to help you-

Stick smiled at him and rose an hand to let him and Karen shake it.

-You are my only hope, I think- the old man answered

-Why don't you join me Mr...-

-Stick-

-Mr. Stick, why don't you join me for lunch? There is a nice place not far away from here. The food is good and they have separated tables, so we can speak privately-

Foggy can feel a trickle of cold sweat run down his back. He didn't know exactly how many superpowers the man had, but he knew he could be unbelievably dangerous. He was quite sure he could smell his fear and he hoped at least to be able to keep Karen out of this.

If not, Matt's secret identity would be secret no more -Lunch is on our firm, of course- added when the blind man didn't respond.

-Well... ok- And for the love of theater, Foggy offered him his arm as he was used to doing with Matt, and Stick took it, letting him lead the way. Everything went off as soon as Foggy was sure Karen wouldn't be able to see them from the windows.

He threw away his arm. -Wow. You really are a smart one, aren't you, Mr. Nelson?-

-What do you want?- stupid question, but the important thing was to take time.

-The kid-

-Sorry. I don't have children-

-I'll take back the "you are smart" part. Where is Matt?-

-You are suppose to tell me. He is with you.-

Foggy knew he was out of time. This time he could avoid the question, but how long could that last? Sooner or later he would have to lie, and in that moment, Stick would knew, and all of them would be screwed.

An ordinary lunch-break for the Devil of Hell's Kitchen's best friend.

-He escaped-

-You should pay more attention to your puppy then-

The old man right hand turned into a fist. The lawyer was pushing his luck, he was aware of that, but they were in a crowded street, walking along and talking in low voices, and he knew (hoped, more likely) he wouldn't dare to attack him.

Suddenly his left foot stumbled into something and he needed some steps and a lot of luck to not find his face against the asphalt of the sidewalk. He saw Stick's grin and cursed. He had used that damn cane to make him fall.

How many times Matt done the same prank to him while they were drunk?

-Screw you- he snarled regaining his balance.

-Where is he?- Stick's voice was a whisper, but his tone was starting to be harsh. He was getting angry, Foggy didn't need superpowers to see that, but anyway, he would try to resist for as long as possible.

* * *

What the hell had happened?

What was Claire doing?

 _Calm down, Matty. Calm down._

Foggy's voice echoed in his head, as many other times in the last month. He tried to take some deep breath to clear his mind, but there was something that was preventing him fully doing that. It was like there was a sort of fog covering his brain building some kind of wall between him and the rest of the world.

He could barely feel Claire's hand squeezing his forearms, gentle but strong at the same time. She was holding him down, probably to prevent him from trying to escape.

He didn't remember anything of the past few hours, his memories stopped at the moment in which the nurse had put that sweatshirt on him. Had he fallen asleep? Did he hurt her?

He tried to recall even the smallest image, but whatever was shrouding his brain didn't allow him to do even that.

Panic grew inside him. Had he hurt her? He tried to listen to her body, if there was anything that could give him at least that little answer, but nothing came to his ears.

He tried to shake his head to free himself... and a sudden spin made him almost vomit.

If dizziness were annoying for normal people, for a sightless person it was simply terrible. His body couldn't help himself without the eyes to regain stability, and for him was like being on a roller coaster in the night.

Luckily, he was lying on the couch, and the surface on his back helped him.

-Matt? What's going on? Are you ok?-

-Yes... - he began, then corrected himself. The world on fire was not as raging as it usually was. Everything was hidden by the same fog he was feeling in his head. His ears were receiving too much input at the same time, and he wasn't really able to control them. He turned toward the direction of her voice, but he didn't find her familiar shape. All was a confusing mixture of mist and nothing seemed to be at his place. His heartbeat began to speed up with fear. He was blind, for real this time, well. Not exactly. Blinder than usual were the words that best fit the situation.

 _Matty. Calm down. Talk to her_. Foggy was right. He made a few long deep breaths before speaking again. -Maybe not-

-What is it? Your memories? Do you remember the church?-

Clearly she was thinking he couldn't remember how they met and why he was with her because he'd never answered her question.

-No. I remember... I feel.. It's strange... -

He didn't know how to explain it to her because he hadn't no idea of what was happening to him. Panic rose again in his chest and by instinct he started moving his hand looking desperately for hers. She understood and took it, and he focused on her warm squeeze to try to stop a beginnings of a tremor.

-Matt. Calm down, please- her voice came to help him, something clear between all the noises in his head, while her fresh fingers were caressing his forehead. -I can help you, but you have to talk to me... How do you feel?-

-Foggy- His best friend's nickname was also the word that best described what was happening.

-I've already called him. He is going to call me back. He seemed really worried about you-

-No... I mean. I feel... like...there is a fog...around me... in my head... and...all these noises...- Matt tried to explain himself.

-Can't you...I don't know...shut them out? With... I don't know...meditation?-

-Can't...focus-

-Matt... I think you're running a temperature. Maybe there are some inflammations in your bruisers, or maybe it's due to your panic... can I check?-

He simply nodded. Fever could be a good explanation for everything, and he had to admit that he had spent the last few nights in less than ideal conditions for maintaining health.

It would explain the cold and the soreness he was feeling in his bones, the fog and his lack of concentration.

Wait.

Did she said he had called Foggy?

Shit.

In that moment someone knocked on the door.

Matt got tense, trying and failing to feel the visitor's heartbeat.

There was only one person able to hide it so well.

-Claire- he whispered -Don't open the door-

He tried to sit, clinging to the backrest of the couch to support the position. He had to figure out something to protect Claire.

-Who is it, Matt?- He was scaring her, and he was sorry about that, but he was too weak to face him and all he wanted was for her to be safe.

-It's him- he answered

* * *

(1)Little Horn is the English translation of the Italian translation of one of DD's nickname in comic books, Horn-Head. It Italy has been translated with "cornetto" (yes, like the ice-cream), I think because the real translation, "cornuto", it's something really bad to say to someone. Reading "cornetto" makes me smile every time, and little horn sounds really cute in English too... so... that's where it comes from.

Thanks for reading so far!


	8. Kept in the dark

**PERSONAL SPACE** : Hi everyone! Thanks to everyone for reading, following and putting this into favourites so far, and thanks a lot to **zoeperja** for her rewiev!

Happy reading!

And please, rewiev if you can! This is my first FF in English ever, and your opinion, advices or whatever you have to say to me it's very important to get better!

Thanks **InsertImaginativeNameHere** for being such a wonderful beta!

* * *

 **Chapter 8: Kept in the dark  
**

* * *

Somehow, Foggy and Stick managed to get to Matt's apartment without killing each other. The lawyer knew that wasn't the best idea he had ever had, but he didn't want to discuss such a thing in a public place, and bringing him to his own home was not a valid option.

If Stick knew his address, he could blackmail them in the future, so he would have to find it by himself.

-Are you going to tell me where your friend is?- Stick asked, and now Foggy knew how bad his idea was. In a restaurant, Stick wouldn't dare to hurt him. He could beat him under the table with his cane, but nothing more.

Now they were in Matt's loft and they were alone. The blond cursed himself. He was so focused on not putting other people in danger that he hadn't given a second's thought to his own safety.

-What if I say no?-

While Stick wouldn't ask him directly where Matt was, he could manage not to lie, to answer in a way the other man couldn't detect any falsehoods because then no lie had been told.

It was something he learnt in his college days, a particular skill that had always amused Matt anytime he went with him on oral exams.

When Foggy didn't study enough, he began to avoid questions he didn't know how to respond to giving half of the answer and then changing the subject of interest. When the professors were in a good mood or didn't want to make things difficult, he usually got up from that chair with a fairly good mark.

Of course, he had never thought he would need to use this ability to try to save both his and Matt's lives.

-I'm losing my patience, boy- Stick warned -And trust me, you don't want me to finish it-

Stick made a step toward him. He wasn't openly menacing him, but that made Foggy swallow while cold sweat ran down his spine -Tell me where he is- this time there was no question mark at the end of the sentence.

-Or what?- this was his last occasion to delay the inevitable, and he knew that -are you going to kill me?-

-I'm not such an idiot, boy- the old man laughed - And this is not a movie where the hero convinces the bad guy he is vital to his mission. You are brave, more than I'd thought, but this is not gonna save you -

-Should I take that as a compliment?-

Stick ignored him

-So, I've an idea. Since Matt is not here, so I'll have to find someone else to make you more... collaborative-

Stick didn't have to say anything else.

-Stay away from Karen. She knows nothing, you know that!-

-Then I'll ask you one more time. Where the hell is Matt?-

Here they were.

-I don't know-

He knew his heartbeat had increased, Matt told him that. He was expecting to be beaten, tortured.

Instead, Stick was smiling. An evil smile, but, still a smile, was on his face.

-Let's go back to your office-

And the quiet tone he used, was way up on the list of scariest things he had ever heard.

* * *

Karen was sitting at her desk, trying to give an order to Foggy's questionable way of registering documents. She was starting to think his disorder was pathological.

She remembered she had given him those files in chronological order. All he did was read them, but somehow he managed to make a mess.

That was why she preferred to work with Matt.

He was methodical, and he could always find a way to keep everything in the right order.

And he was _blind._

She sighed, resigned to the perspective of a boring day. She took her phone, and, not for the first time, her finger hesitated on Matt's number.

She really missed him, and she was worried about the blind man. Matt was handling the death of a person he cared about, and she thought he shouldn't have to face it all alone.

Many times she had thought to call him, but then she gave up because she had learnt how reserved he was about himself and she had feared hurting his feelings.

She was trying to find a place for the sill-open cases that could be easy to reach when she heard a clonk coming from Matt's office. First, she had thought it was just her imagination, but soon other noises were added to that.

She stood, as quiet as possible, and tried to reach the front door to escape. There was nothing in that office that was worth being saved: all the documents had a backup on Foggy's personal computer, the one he had at home, and the machinery was so old that no one would steal it just to make some money.

She wasn't prepared to find three guys waiting for her right behind the door.

She couldn't do anything to stop them. They took her despite hers attempts to fight and with hands on her mouth prevent her from screaming out.

They forced Karen to go back into the small office and made her sit on Matt's office chair, where two other man were standing. The looked like the man in the mask; they were some kind of powerful ninjas, with masks covering their eyes. The only difference was that they had bad intentions.

Karen hadn't been so scared since the day Wesley had kidnapped her, and her first thought was that Fisk had somehow found out she was responsible for his death. The only good news was that nobody else was in the office right now.

-Please- she begged as soon as they took away the hands from her mouth -Don't hurt my friends. I... I'll come with you-

-If your friend here will become more... co-operative, no one is going to hurt you-

She recognized the voice immediately: Mr. Stick. He was stepping into the small office, with Foggy right behind him.

-Foggy!-

-Karen!-

Foggy turned to watch the blind man.

-Don't hurt her!-

-Then tell me what I want to know. Where is Matt Murdock-

Matt? Why the hell these guys were looking for Matt? Karen turned her eyes to Foggy's. He was scared, she could see that, but he was trying to resist.

* * *

Foggy's life had never been so difficult before.

The worst decision he had to make was maybe the ones for college, but only because his mom wanted him to be a butcher and he didn't know how to tell her he wanted to be a lawyer without sounding disrespectful.

Even after his fight with Matt, he didn't have so many difficult decisions about going to the gym and talking to him. He had felt betrayed, of course, but then, thinking about it, about how dangerous being the man in the mask was, he had understood why he had acted like that; plus, he had missed his best friend so much he just couldn't keep living without his company.

Now this damn blind guy was forcing him to choose between his brother and Karen, and he didn't have any idea on how handle this whole situation.

He knew what Matt would have done; he would speak without hesitation to save someone in danger, but Foggy was still thinking about Claire's words, and he wasn't so sure his best friend was stronger than Karen right now.

 _She is innocent, Fog. Stop playing around and talk. I can handle this._

 _You can't little horn! You are not even real! You are just my stupid brain!_

-Foggy!- Karen voice was shaking but loud and strong at the same time -Don't tell them anything!-

One of the ninjas hit her on her face, leaving a big red spot on her cheek. She screamed in pain and surprise, and Foggy's instinct acted before he could be fully aware of what he was doing. He took Matt's spare cane from the nearest corner and used it to attack the ninjas.

* * *

Karen couldn't avoid to scream when she saw the most stupid and equally brave gesture someone had ever done to protect her.

A hand immediately shut her mouth so no one could come and help them.

She was compelled to watch Mr. Stick and the ninjas tear Foggy down with a brutality she couldn't really explain to herself.

Obviously the lawyer wasn't a real danger to them, and his act was only due to his protective instinct but they were treating him as if he were Daredevil.

Foggy fell down at the first shot, and since he wasn't trained to fight, he had no chance to fight them back. He couldn't even rise again.

She bit the hand over her mouth, making the man groan in pain, but, more important, he left her.

-Please!- she cried -Please, stop! You are going to kill him! Please!-

Hitting him with one last kick Stick finally left her friend alone. He was on the floor, barely awake, moaning with sorrow.

-K... Karen...- was all he managed to whisper before losing consciousness.

-Foggy! Foggy!-

-Shut up. He will live- Stick cut her off -Now, if you don't want see him dead, please, help us and I promise you everything is gonna be all right-

-No way- Another kick reached Foggy's back. -Ok. Ok. Please. Stop. I can tell you where Matt is -

-No, you can't, kid. They lied to you. Now, you're coming with us, preferably without making us hurt you too much-

Karen took a minute to think about her situation. She didn't care they had lied to her, not right now, even if she would probably make the two of them regret this. She looked at Foggy, lying on the ground, and then to the ninja. No way she could run away, so she had no choice. She nodded and followed his instructions.

* * *

Karen woke up in a small room. She tried to sit up, but she found herself tied with her hands behind her back, with a chain connected with one of the legs of the bed she was lying on.

All she could do was lift her torso, a little bit, in a very uncomfortable position, but that helped her with the exploration of the area.

It was a very small chamber, with only the bed and a small window to high too be reached by her even in a standing position, but that was enough to understand it was already dark outside. That told her several hours had passed from the moment she was forced to leave the office.

The office.

Foggy.

God!

Forgetting the chain, she suddenly tried again to raise herself with a start. She remembered they had left her friend lying on the ground, unconscious from the beating they gave to him when he had tried to save her.

A stab of pain coming from her wrists compelled her to lay down again on the mattress. She started shouting out as loud as she could in order to get attention from the ninja or, even better, from Stick himself. She was lucky.

The old blind man entered the room, his cane in his hands, and she immediately understood she had to be very careful about her behavior. The way he was holding it suggested he was going to use it to hit her and not to help him to navigate around the room.

He walked straight toward her, those light blue blind eyes one of the most frightening things she had ever seen in her entire life.

She had always known blind men's eyes were expressionless; since they couldn't see, their eyes didn't need to focus, and from that the need to wear sunglasses all the time arose; that blank look could make people uncomfortable. She had seen Matt's eyes sometimes, he used to take his glasses off when he was alone with Foggy. They were brown and beautiful, with a sweet expression on them. They were warm.

Stick's eyes were the furthest away from Matt's possible. They were cold, harsh. Soulless.

She felt a shiver running down her spine. Stick hadn't moved yet, and she was already terrified at what he could do.

-What do you want, kid?- he groaned.

-Where is Foggy? What did you have done to him?-

-He challenged me. Now he is paying for that- And with no other words, he left her.

Some minutes later, one of the ninjas stepped into her cell and closed her mouth with a bit of tape.

* * *

He didn't remember the ceiling of their office was dark brown. Had Karen decided to paint that without asking their permission? God... she didn't do a great job. The color was oppressive and it gave the impression of being so close if he had risen he could reach out and touch i... wait. He could actually touch it. And it sounded like... and where did those columns come from?

Suddenly his head started pounding, and from all his body came nothing but pain. He moaned while he remembered what had happened. He realized in that moment he had been left under the desk, and that the colums were actually its legs.

-Karen!- He tried to call out, his voice loud besides the sorrow -Karen!-

When he heard back nothing but silence, he forced himself to stand. He realized soon he had to take one step at the time. He managed to get on his knees, then waited for the spins and the pain to stop before using the edge of the table to stand.

-Karen!- He cried out one more time, although he was already sure he was alone in the firm.

He felt sorrow in every inch of his body, but, still, the most painful thing was not knowing where they had brought the girl. She was innocent and completely unaware of Matt's activity as a vigilante. Stick would torture her for nothing.

Dammit Murdock!

The he noticed something on the desk, right under his eyes. It was black and vintage, but Foggy couldn't not recognize it. It was one of those old voice recorders Matt used during college.

Since they hadn't used one of those things for years, he figured Stick had left it for him. He pushed the play button, and when he heard the message, he froze.

How could he do something like that to his best friend?

* * *

Outside the sky seemed very dark, and she was still lying on that bed, still tied and with that damn thing on her mouth which was giving her also some breathing issues.

She had cried, a lot, after being left alone; not for herself, but for Foggy, and also for Matt.

They both lied to her, and probably Matt had not been telling the truth to them since the beginning, but all she could think about right now were her two friends, the only people who actually cared about her and who now were in danger.

For all she knew, Foggy could already be dead right now. Stick could have been back to their office and have finished him off at any time.

And Matt. God, why in hell's name would someone want Matt so bad to menace the closest people he had to a family?

That question was stuck in her head.

There was something he hadn't told her, something maybe even Foggy didn't know. Then what was his secret? Did Foggy know? This last question was really hard to tell. Those two guys were more than friends, more than brothers. It was something she couldn't really define, something that almost destroyed both of them during that fight.

They completely trusted each other, or at least, Foggy trusted Matt with all his heart, while Matt's feelings worked in a more mysterious way. Foggy was covering for Matt, but did he know what was happening?

The door's opening gave a break to her thoughts. She turned toward the entrance while Stick stepped into the cell. Without hesitation he approached her, ripping off the tape only to put his hand over her mouth as fast as possible.

-Try to scream, and you'll regret this. Understood?- she was still shocked, her skin felt burning and in pain around her lips, so it took her a while for the words to be processed by her brain. -Am I understood?- he yelled.

With a jump she nodded, and finally that big strong hand freed her mouth. She couldn't avoid sobbing, mostly for the tension hoarded in those hours. Stick gave her a couple of minutes to recover, then began to speak.

-How much do you know of Matthew?-

-What... what do you want from him?-

-And that answers my question. You know nothing-

-What should I know about him?- she asked, noticing for the first time that although he was blind he wasn't using his cane; somehow, he was perfectly able to survive without it... as Matt sometimes did in their office.

Images of her employer navigating in the firm without any help suddenly came to her, his way of slightly turning his head, exactly the same way the old man was doing right now; she had asked him once how could it walk through the office without killing himself, mostly because Foggy had the vice of leaving basically everything around the floor. His answer was a wry smile, followed by an explanation made of equal parts luck and practice. After four years of life around his friend, Matt was used to his disorder, so he was able to pay attention on what was resting on the ground.

At that time she had laughed hard at that, but now she couldn't stop thinking that was a very poor explanation.

-All you have to know is that he broke a deal, and now he is gonna pay for that-

-Where is Foggy? Did you kill him?-

-Worse- was the answer -I sent him to his personal hell. He will have to choose between his friend... and the girl he loves-

-Foggy will never choose me over Matt. He doesn't love me-

-His heartbeat says different. And, by the way, he already has-

-Why Matt is so important to you? Foggy can help you as well-

-I don't think so-

-He's a hell of an attorney-

For the first time, Karen could see an emotion crossing Stick's face. It was pure and genuine astonishment, as he couldn't believe she had just said that.

-Do you still believe I need a fucking attorney? That I made all this up to engage Matt Murdock, the lawyer? Are you born that stupid or has hanging around with those two idiots made you so?-

The anger in those words make her shivering with fear. For some reason, what she had said had got him mad. He was shouting out so loud that one of the ninjas dare to came into the room asking if everything was all right. Stick calmed himself down by closing his eyes and taking long and deep breaths before leaving the cell muttering something about how useless and naive she was.

Karen took a sigh of relief when the ninja also left the room without touching her.

The ninja.

There was something in them that made her think about Daredevil. Well, not exactly. They reminded her of the man in the mask, but what it was, she couldn't tell. Her mind began to work on that by herself, taking the "think-about-something-else-to-not-freak-out" offer.

The woman tried to create a mental screening of the vigilante who saved her life, and the put the two figures together, side by side, trying to spot the common elements.

The answer came after a while.

The eyes.

Or better.

The mask that covered the eyes.

She hadn't cared about it until now, but when he was wearing the old costume, Daredevil's black mask covered his face from the top of the head until his nose, and now that she was paying attention, there were no holes for his eyes, or something that suggested he were able to see where he was hitting.

The dark suits of the ninjas were made in the same exactly way, there was nothing in their upper that allowed them to use their eyes.

Stick was in charge, and he was blind, so it was logical to assume that also his men couldn't see.

Matt was blind, and if Karen "looked" at the mental picture of her friend, his built was very similar to the Devil's.

No. No way.

That couldn't be.

Matt _was not_ Daredevil.

But something in her head was telling her that a lot of pieces of the puzzle named Matthew Michael Murdock would fit if she would just assume that he was the vigilante of Hell's Kitchen, starting from his bruises, all the nights she and Foggy couldn't find him, Wilson Fisk, and from that straight to the "car accident".

Did Foggy know since the beginning? Did Ben know as well?

Was she the only one kept in the dark?


	9. Everyone in life should have a Foggy

**PERSONAL SPACE** : Thanks to everyone who had read until now, specially **Zoe Perja** who rewieved. Thanks for ponting out those mistakes!

And thanks again to **InsertImaginativeNameHere!**

Happy reading!

* * *

 _ **Chapter 9:**_  
 _ **Everyone in life should have a Foggy**_

* * *

-Matt! Claire!-

Foggy?

She had thought that Foggy's voice would help Matt calm down.

She was very, very wrong.

Matt started to freak out again, muttering something about a stick who had found Foggy and Karen and now was going to make him pay for his disobedience. She didn't pay so much attention to the delirious chatter, his health was all she cared about right now.

-Matt. Matt. Calm down- the adrenaline was giving him a sudden strength she couldn't fight for long. Her words were useless. She tried to reach the door, but the blind man pushed her to the floor with his weight, without hurting her. He just didn't want her opening the door. She tried to fight him but he was too strong.

-Guys! What's up in there? Let me in!- she could hear Foggy hitting the door.

-Matt! Matt!- she tried to get his attention once more, still fighting to get out from his grasp, raising her voice to overwhelm Foggy's, but his patience was wearing thin. Somehow she managed to free her hands. Claire took his head and forced the lawyer to look straight in her eyes, forgetting he couldn't really see her. She got worried about how hot his skin was. Fever was no longer just a suspect.

-Matt. Focus. Listen to my voice- she whispered near to his lips. Yelling at him was useless, so she was trying a different approach. It seemed to work. He stopped trying to move, even if he was still keeping her stuck on the ground, one of his legs twisted between hers to make her fall if she managed to make him lose his grip around her chest. -Are you listening to me, Matt?- she kept talking the same way, her voice so low she barely could hear it. She was forcing him to concentrate on something.

-Yes-

 _Good._

-Can you feel my heartbeat?- it was just a test to try his lucidity. Heartbeats were the easiest thing for him to listen to even with panic.

-No-. Shit. _Don't freak out, Claire._

-Focus. I know you can-

* * *

No, he couldn't, and that was what was making his panic rise. Without his powers (even if he didn't like think about his abilities with that term), he couldn't tell how many people were at her door, nor if the fear he could hear in Foggy's voice was real.

All Matt could think was that Stick had found out about his forced escape and gone back to Hell's Kitchen. Now his mentor had found them and everyone was in danger simply because he couldn't handle some violence and a few murders.

The fog in his mind wasn't helping.

Nor was Claire's fight against him.

He had to prevent her from opening that door. Unless there was a wall between the two of them and Stick, they weren't safe.

He had to recover quickly.

He could hear Foggy's voice begging to let him in, almost hysterical right now. Maybe Stick was forcing him to say that.

While he felt terrible about it, he couldn't allow this to happen. He was sure his best friend would understand.

-Matt. Focus- Claire's voice was so low he was compelled to concentrate to hear it over Foggy's screams and the smoke in his head. -Look for my heartbeat. Come on-

-Why?- He was getting tired. God, he felt so tired.

The world on fire around him began to get unclear, as if there was some kind of wind making it blur. Lines started to became curves, bending in on themselves in a confused spiral of flames and black...was that ash?

Something was putting out the fire, the black was going to dominate.

 _No. Please. Not now._

* * *

He fought until he could no longer struggle, then he simply passed out, trapping her under his dead weight.

-Claire?! Matt! Open the door!- now she could clearly hear the tone of concern in the blond lawyer's voice. He was still punching the door.

-I'm ok, Foggy!- she called out to reassure him. -I'm coming. Please. Stop doing that!-

I'm coming was actually a big lie, but if he had kept on in that way, neighbors could wind up calling the police, and other troubles were the last thing they needed.

First, she had to find a way to slip out from Matt's body without hurting him. No way. Even in panic, he had done a damn good job, and if she wanted to get out, she had to use less gentle ways.

 _Sorry, Matt._

She grabbed his shoulders and bought her knees up to help leverage him off her.

It wasn't delicate and probably she'd just added a new bruise on her friend's chest, but he had left her no choice.

He fell with an unconscious moan, but he didn't wake up, fortunately. She wasn't sure she could handle one more of those panic attacks straight away.

Trying to calm down, trembling slightly from a combination of fear and tension, she walked to the door and opened the it, letting Foggy come in.

She had expected to be invisible to Foggy, that he would take care of Matt, instead he barely looked at him. His attention was fully on her as he came closer to her in order to check if she was ok.

-Are you ok, Claire?- he asked hugging her tight -You seem... upset-

-I... I'm ok.- She answered after a second of surprise. Matt was right about him. He really was a good man -I will be, at least-

-Did he hurt you?- he stepped back far enough to look her in the eyes.

-No... It's just...- She took a deep breath to stop the trembling in her voice - When he heard your voice... he... just.. freaked out... he...- Air in. Air out. She attempted to find a way to keep talking without somehow panicking herself. The experience had left her more shaken than she had thought - blocked me to the floor... saying something about a stick... or a cane...I don't know... -

-How is he?- he inquired now she was calmer.

-Bad- Matt's medical situation helped her to quickly recover her cold-blooded strength. She mentally thanked Foggy for offering that distraction -I can't tell how much, because it's not physical. Not just physical, at least. He can't focus-

-Is he running a temperature?-

-I was about to take it when you arrived. But I'm quite sure he is.-

Foggy suddenly, without saying a word, went to the window and closed it, than he did the same for all the doors, except for the one the bathroom. He even used his jacket to block up the space between the door and the floor. Claire was looking at him, asking herself if he'd gone mad during the trip from New York.

She could deal with Matt, not both of them.

-Can I ask...- she began, but he cut her off.

-It's the fever. I didn't realize that before, back in college I just thought he couldn't handle it because of the spins, but now I think I know why... I mean. With this superpowers story...-

Ok. For being a lawyer, he wasn't speaking very eloquently right now, and she was getting really confused by the torrent of words coming out of his mouth.

-Foggy, Foggy, Foggy- she stopped him -Please. Explain yourself. Can you?-

-Wasn't I clear?-

 _Seriously?_ Ok. She could handle this. He was little more than a grown up boy.

-Matt chattering about a stick kidnapping people was clear. Now. Take a breath, manage all the files you have your brain, then speak. Can you?-

-Ok, ok. Understood. But he wasn't referring to a stick, anyway. Stick is a guy-

 _What_? Ok. One thing at a time. Matt first.

-What were you saying about fever and superpowers?- she asked.

-When Matt had a fever, back in college, it was terrible. He only could lay in his bed, crying out in some sort of pain. He was completely out of control. He'd told me head spins are worse to him because he can't see the line between sky and earth...- she nodded and shuffled her hand, inviting him to move on. She'd already seen how bad they were -I'd always thought the pain came from that, you know-

-Yeah. Go on-

-But now he'd explained to me about his superpowers, I know he always has to stay focused to prevent being dominated by all the noises out there...-

She got it.

-But the fever could make impossible for him to do that.- she completed. Then, she added -And he's probably scared to death if this Stick blackmailed him by threatening to hurt you-

-... and you-

-We have to lower his temperature- she decided, her professional side taking charge of this crazy situation. Wait. One more thing.

-How did you find us? I thought you would call me back...-

-Yeah. I was. But Matt has been missing for a whole month... and you said...emotional collapse. I had to come and take him back home- he stopped and his cheeks went red -You'd say that's stupid...-

She couldn't avoid smiling, thinking that everyone in life should have a Foggy. Well, not really him, but someone who cared about you the way Foggy was doing for Matt.

He didn't give a shit he was blind or a damn urban superhero strong enough to survive by himself (when he wasn't passing out in some dumpster, or bleeding out in his own apartment, obviously).

-That's not stupid- she stopped him -Actually... it's quite cute of you. He needs someone like you-

-He doesn't. He can take care of himself-

-He needs someone who can help him not to lose his soul-

-I am not his priest-

-You are his family- she concluded in a way that stopped him to replicate to that. -You didn't answer, anyway-

-Well... you said Boston, near MIT... and I did some research. Matt told me you were out of town some months ago, before we took down Fisk, so I looked for your name in Boston and I found you rented this flat- He made it sound so easy, she was surprised nobody had found her sooner.

-I'm glad you're here- she smiled again. In the mean time she took Matt's temperature. She already knew by touching him it was high, but she needed a number -He needs you-

-He needs you too, right now- he corrected -And not just because he is ill-

No. No. No.

 _Not right now. Please._

Claire took the thermometer off him and cursed when she read it. She hadn't thought it could be so high actually. It was over 103 degrees Fahrenheit.

-Do me a favor- she went back to being an efficient nurse. She had to. She was not going to have this kind of conversation with Foggy. She already knew how important she was to Matt. She had been aware since the time she had told him she was leaving, the sadness in his expression, hidden behind his shy smile, was something she couldn't forget so easily. And the fact that she was able to bring him to reason with a single touch was a confirmation she hadn't needed. -We can't wait for drugs to be effective, actually I haven't given anything to him, not yet. But if things go as you said, we have to lower his temperature as quickly as possible. Trust me, you don't want to see him in panic. Go to the bathroom. Run the cold water. I'll be right back-

-Where are you going?-

-To the ice machine we have in the basement- she replied shutting the door behind her.

* * *

The first thing Foggy did once he was alone was obey her orders. The second one was call Stick.

-Are you with him?- the old man asked in his usual cold voice.

-Of course I am- he responded, he really wanted to lie, but his concern for Karen's safety made him tell the truth. Matt was still here with him and Claire, while she was alone with that crazy man and his band of ninjas.

-Bring him to me-

-Not a chance.- somewhere inside him, he found the courage to stand up for Matt -He is ill. He needs to rest and recover-

-He can handle it-

He didn't asked how much he was messed up, or if he was able to move.

Foggy started wondering if Stick was even human, or if he were born without his soul. He was the one who had trained Matt and who had been with him the last few weeks. Was even possible he really hadn't given a shit about his pupil?

-No way- Foggy wasn't going to let this go. Even if he was forced to betray him, Matt was still his best friend, a part of his family, and Foggy would get himself killed before putting him in danger.

He could have managed to do that if he'd found Matt in a good shape, but not with him like this.

Hell, he hadn't even chosen to escape from Stick. He'd collapsed in a damn church! -I'll take him to you, but only when he will be able to stand on his own feet-

Foggy heard Claire's steps and hung up the phone, ignoring what Stick was saying to him. It was probably some kind of threat, but he didn't care. His mind was completely focused on his best friend right now. He let the cold water fill the tub, and when she stepped into the room, she found him on Matt's side, one hand on his shoulder, the other putting his black shirt on his forehead, soaked with fresh water. He hadn't intended to use that, that clothes still reminded him of that damn night, but that was the first thing he had seen in her bathroom without searching her furniture.

He helped her put the ice in the cold water, and then the two of them took off Matt's clothes and lifted him by his hands and legs to put him in the tub.

The cold water woke Matt up with a scream of pure terror, the kind that made them wish they would never have to hear something similar again, not from him at least, while he started to scramble out of it in a way both of them had never seen before. It was like he was falling down into a basin full of piranhas. Foggy and Claire took his hands, one from each side, hoping he would not try to kill them.

-Matt. It's us- Foggy told him to reassure him, trying to keep his friend's head out of the water at the same time. He was screaming and making strange movements and Foggy didn't want him to swallow any.

-Your temperature is very high. We have to lower it. Please, hold on. Just a minute. Please- Claire begged, caressing his forehead to calm him down.

Foggy didn't know what the magic in her hands (or voice) was, but as soon as she spoke Matt stopped whatever he was trying to do (it was not clear if he was trying to get of of the water, kill them or both). Claire saw the window of stillness and immediately took his hand. She kept talking to him until he finally regained a bit of his lucidity.

He saw his friend take control of his body, forcing himself to stay still despite everything. Matt took deep breaths, closed his eyes. Foggy left him with Claire and went for some warm towels for him.

-Can you hear my heart, Matt?- Claire asked him.

-Barely- he answered. -It's hard...to focus-

-As soon as you are ready we'll get you out of this, ok?-

He didn't need so much time. When he came out, Foggy was ready to wrap him in the towel, rubbing his arms around his chest to warm him up as fast as possible.

* * *

Something was wrong with Foggy.

He didn't exactly remember what happened from the moment he'd heard his voice and the second he'd woken up in a tub full of water and ice, but Claire'd told him he had a sort of panic attack before passing out.

According to her, he was terrified about Stick kidnapping and hurting them.

It turned out it was all in his mind. Claire had called Foggy and he'd done everything possible to join them.

Matt believed her words without listening to her heart. He knew she was sincere and he still had some concentration issues even if the fever was now lower.

After the forced bath, he'd managed to sleep for a couple of hours, and now he was feeling better, even if Foggy and Claire didn't want him to get up.

But they couldn't stop him from thinking.

-I'm going to bed, Matt- he heard the nurse's voice near, her hand taking his. She was exhausted, he could hear that in her voice even behind the fog. He felt guilty. She had left New York because all of this, and he had just pulled her in again. -Foggy is going to take care of you tonight. Call me if you need help, ok?-

-Claire?-

-Don't say it...-

-I'm sorry-

He heard her lips skim over his forehead in a soft kiss. He could sense her smiling.

He really wanted to kiss her, hug her and leave the rest behind: Daredevil, Stick, whatever was keeping them apart. He squeezed her hand slightly, tempted to pull her to his chest.

He forced himself to stop and let her go.

-Good night- he whispered with a smile, mostly certain she hadn't seen anything of his internal fight.

-Rest- she commanded. -You are safe and Foggy is here with you-

-I'll try-

-No! Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try.-

Matt smiled, getting the quote, then let her hands go and laid his head on the pillow of the couch. She'd wanted to give him her bed, but he refused. There was no need for that. A safe place, the people he cared about were more than enough for him to sleep well.

But he still had to talk with Foggy.

There was something really wrong with him, and now the fog was gradually dissolving in his mind, and that he was able to control his emotions, his fear, he could recognize all the signals coming from his best friend.

He was nervous in a way Matt hadn't witnessed since their first day at Landman and Zack, no need to use his heightened senses for that, being his friend was more than enough.

He didn't worry too much about that; out of their duo, Foggy had always been the more nervous one, and all the situations, with him missing, Claire's call, his panic and everything else that had happened had messed him up, probably.

But still, he could perceive that there was something else, something deeper. Matt tried to focus, but the immediate spin suggested that if he wanted to knew something more, he had to go the human way. No short cut, at least for now.

* * *

Foggy was in agony. And still agony was not the right word to describe his situation, and, for a moment, he had considered Matt's fever a blessing, even if that was making him unable to do basically everything. Foggy was glad he couldn't sense his heartbeat right now, otherwise, his friend would have already discovered his secret.

The blond-haired young man couldn't wait for Matt to fall asleep; he felt the need to stay alone and cry.

It was like he had a giant stone on his chest making it difficult to breathe. He was experiencing some kind of physical pain, as if someone had threaded a needle right into the center of his heart.

Foggy didn't know exactly how to handle the whole thing. The message Stick had left him had forced him to choose Karen over Matt, and while he knew it was the right thing to do, and he was aware that his partner would have done exactly the same thing, he still had no idea how to tackle the problem with him, mostly because he was fearing that the Devil of Hell's Kitchen would return to New York immediately. He knew his friend enough to be sure of that. To save them he would agree to leave again, and in his current shape, that would mean nothing but death.

Suddenly, he couldn't just hold on anymore; tears began to drop from his eyes and he just couldn't stop them.

-Foggy?-

* * *

Foggy didn't knew anything about Matt's secret. Not at the beginning, at least.

The truth had suddenly hit Karen while she was trying to eat something with the only arm they agreed to leave untied in order to let her eat. Unfortunately, it was the left one, and it wasn't simple try to have a meal with only one hand while you couldn't sit.

The surprise of the revelation made her drop the spoon, the food forgotten in the plate.

Another piece of the puzzle was now in its place.

Foggy discovered his best friend was the vigilante the night of the accident. Foggy probably found Matt somewhere, so badly injured she had jumped when she had visited him a couple of days later, and in that moment he had found out everything.

That's why they didn't speak to each other anymore after that. That's why Matt was so sure the fight was solely his fault.

Karen had always thought she had been the cause of everything, that somehow Foggy had discovered she had a crush on the blind guy that he was secretly returning, mostly because after that, both of them barely spoke to her too.

The blonde had thought that only a big issues like a woman could tear those two apart, but now that she was thinking about it, a blind guy who ran through the city beating people up, hiding some kind of special power, could be a more than valid reason.

That wasn't important right now, anyway.

She would kick both their asses once they got out of this mess, because she would, but now, all she wanted to know was if her friends were ok.

* * *

Thanks for reading! Rewievs, PM or whatever you like to use to let me know if you like it or not will be appreciated!


	10. Don't Claire me, Murdock!

**PERSONAL SPACE:** Hi! Thanks for reading so far! I've reached 2000 wievs for Friendship and Loyalty so... thank you so much!

Special thanks to my beta, InsertImaginativeNameHere for her advices and editing, and also to Zoe Perja who helped me with the very final editing of chapter 10 (and also for the errors you pointed put on chapter 9) since my official beta is on holiday (read: I need someone who cleans up my mess when I add things after the first editing). Thank you so much! Both of you are amazing!

Special thanks also to Goldacharmed for her rewievs!

* * *

 _ **Chapter 10: Don't Claire me, Murdock!**_

* * *

Matt was trying to shut out the rest of the world and meditate when he heard it.

He had listened to Claire's breathing become deeper as soon as she had fallen asleep, and was using that as a starting point to slip into meditation. It was harder than usual because of the fever and the drugs Claire had forced him to take in order to lower it. Actually, she gave him the choice between those and ice-water baths, and he had decided that he had enough of cold water for at least a year, if not the rest of his life.

It took him a while, and the second he managed to reach the target, he had heard it.

It was something that took him back months, to that damn morning. He was on a couch as well, and Foggy was crying.

Ignoring spins and the resulting sickness, he sat up.

-Foggy?- he called, his voice a whisper. He didn't want to wake Claire.

He barely remembered anything more than shattered images of what had happened in the last couple of days; she had told him he had slept for the most of time, but he was suspecting that the moments he was awake he had given her a rough time, and if he knew her well, she hadn't slept too much, too intent on taking care of him to pay the same attention to herself.

No answer came from Foggy, but now he could hear his sobs and his stifled weeping. His best friend was somewhere in the room, he knew that, all he had to do was locate him.

Matt tried to focus on the small space, searching for Foggy's heartbeat. He started to fight with the haze in his head. Eventually, he found him.

He was not far away, lying on what seemed to be something like a mattress. The shapes were not so vivid as if he were healthy, but was still better than the confusion he remembered from the day before. Slowly he stood and moving his hands to help himself to navigate in the room,all his concentration focused on not losing Foggy's position, hoping they had left nothing on the floor, somehow managing to reach for him.

-Foggy- he called again, starting to worry. He hated being unable to feel what was going on with him just by listening to his heart, but it would require energy he didn't have and, beside that, he had sworn he wouldn't do that to him anymore .

His hands found Foggy's arm and shoulder, and he could finally give his brain a break. He gently squeezed it, hoping for a reaction. -Foggy. Foggy, please. Say something...- he begged when he got nothing -You are freaking me the hell out. Fog...-

In response his partner's sobs increased, and Matt couldn't do anything but put an hand on his back, trying to make him feel he was there for him no matter what without speaking. He began to move it in big and slow circles, hoping somehow to be helpful.

He didn't know how long he had kept going with it, he didn't care, but eventually Foggy was able to calm down, slipping into a fickle and troubled sleep. After everything the blond-haired man had done for him in all those years of their friendship, Matt didn't feel like leaving him. He fought with his own weakness and even if he knew Claire would kill him, he stayed beside him.

* * *

Claire woke up the next morning after a full night of sleep. Only God knew how much she had needed it after the days she had passed with Matt.

She needed a shower too, but her sense of duty was stronger than that, so the first thing she did was going and check the Devil sleeping on her... floor near to his best friend.

She wanted to kill him.

 _Go and have that shower._ Claire ordered herself. _You can murder him later._

She took all the time she needed, knowing that Foggy was there to help, and when she came out, her killer instinct had almost evaporated completely. Almost.

Directing herself toward the kitchen, she looked for something to eat. On her way she stopped for a while, looking at the two men, Foggy on the mattress and Matt beside him on the floor. His hand was on his friend shoulder as if he was trying to feel his presence by touching him. They were cute, but only because they weren't currently causing her to lose her temper.

She wondered if Nelson was aware of his presence, and what had made Matt's move to the floor.

That didn't really matter now. She was worried about the blind guy's health.

She was tempted to wake him and make him return to the couch, but then she decided that she wouldn't risk another panic attack. She touched his forehead slightly. He was warm, but not so much as to alarm her, so she looked for the fleece blanket she had used the day before and pulled it gently over him, being careful to not disturb his sleep.

* * *

Foggy opened his eyes, and his first feeling was...wet? He lifted his head from the mattress' fabric and noticed his tears had made it damp. Mentally cursing himself, he turned to rise, then he noticed the hand over his shoulder. He looked at it, and finally saw Matthew asleep next to him on the floor, an orange and green blanket covering him.

 _God, Matt._

He remembered his friend reaching for him after his collapse, how he had tried to ignore him even when Matt had informed him he was scared, his hand on his back massaging him in silence, waiting for him to calm down. He hadn't expected he would sleep on the floor to stay by him, and he felt a shooting pain straight in his heart.

He had to tell him everything.

-Are you awake?- Foggy jumped out of his skin.

-Don't sneak up on me!- he answered, whispering in order to not wake Matt, a hand on his heart pretending to be more scared than he actually was. He was rewarded by her rolling her eyes with an exasperated smile. -What time is it?-

-Half past get your ass off that mattress. I need you to keep an eye on Matt. I have to go and buy some foodstuffs. I left my groceries in that church. Can you do that for me?-

He was half asleep, so only few of her words actually made it directly into his brain.

-Yeah. Sure. Bye- Also his answer was longer and more articulate in his mind, but most of that took a wrong turn and found itself lost on the trip to his mouth.

Smiling, she allowed him the time to refresh himself in the bathroom and have a coffee before giving him a couple of instruction.

-When he wakes, make him eat something, there's an apple left, and take his temperature. Drugs are on the coffee table if you need them.-

Luckily Claire didn't ask why in Hell Matt ended up next to him.

-Yes ma'am.- he gave her a salute with a grin on his face.

She shook her head and waved at him, leaving the house.

* * *

Matt was freezing, and that was what woke him. He found himself on the cold floor, the fog in his mind was rising again, now that the effect of the drugs had almost worn off, but all these couldn't prevent him feeling (or more accurately, not feeling) Foggy's figure on the mattress.

-Fog?-

-Good morning, sleeping beauty!- his friend tone was as cheerful and loud as always, coming from the kitchen. His head protested with a sharp pain. He moaned, covering his ears with both of his hands -Oh, sorry buddy- Foggy lowered his voice, making him feel better.

Despite everything, Matt could clearly feel how forced that line was, as if Foggy was killing himself to sound...well, something akin to the regular Foggy. Matt heard him kneeling on his side, his fresh hand on his forehead. -your temperature is rising again, I think. How are you feeling?-

His partner was desperately trying to avoid the inevitable chat about last night, but, at least for now, he decided to play along with that.

-Better- he answered -but the spins are killing me. Is Claire still sleeping?-

-Nope. She went out for shopping... Her fridge is emptier than yo...- his voice cut off. He knew now Matt knew they were alone. Perfect time to face what had happened without other ears listening.

-So? What's going on, Foggy?-

He wasn't looking for it, but his friend's heartbeat increased so much that for a second Matt feared a heart attack. -Foggy? Are you ok?- he asked putting himself into a more comfortable (and warmer) sitting position on the mattress. -your heart is... I don't know... Going crazy-

-You promised me, Murdock!-

-It's not my fault! I can barely focus on my own, but yours is racing like a horse!- he explained, the concern making his voice harsh than he intended. -Sorry- Matt apologized immediately -but, seriously... What's going on? Is it because I left with Stick?- it was a weak guess, he knew that no matter what, that would never lead to a collapse of that kind. He was trying to push him into talking.

The other man remained silent, sit next to him. Matt waited.

-You have to eat something- he finally spoke, and he stood up, helping his friend to do the same and then taking him to the chair in the kitchen. -I'm going to take your temperature, let's see if you need some drugs-

-Thanks, mom-

-Claire's orders- Foggy explained, chuckling -You'd better obey... I bet she could be more dangerous than Karen when she gets riled-

-I don't really want to find out...- Matt smiled him back, biting the apple Foggy had put in his hand. He couldn't exactly remember the last time he had eaten. Oh wait. Yes, he could. He had a pizza the night before Stick's last punishment...and he had thrown it up.

They both stayed silent for a while, and Matt let Foggy taking care of him. He hoped he wouldn't need drugs. He hated drugs. They dimmed his senses, making him feel... Like a real blind person would, even more than fever itself had.

-Matty?-

-Yes?-

-StickhasKarenHeforcedmetocomeheretobringyouhome- Foggy spoke so fast and low Matt couldn't follow him, but his heartbeat, raising again to alarming levels, told him that whatever it was, it was nothing good,

-Foggy. Foggy. Fog. Calm down. Take a breath- he heard his friend trying to obey. He put a hand on the blond's arm. -Try again. Slowly this time-

\- Stick hai Karen atē usa nē ghara dē tuhānū laiṇa la'ī ithē ā'uṇa la'ī majabūra kītā mainū- Matt might laugh hard at his friend speaking - or trying to speak - punjabi, but the words Stick and Karen in the same sentence had frozen his amusement somewhere between his stomach and his throat, specially because he had no idea of what Foggy had said.

-English, please?- he urged.

-Stick has Karen- his friend finally said, and Matt could perceive he wasn't looking at him, his voice so unsure he could barely form words -he forced me to come here and bring you home-

Foggy had broken into tears before finishing speaking, so desperate that Matt's first reaction was to hug him, not daring to think about what he had been through in the last few days.

The blind lawyer held him close, trying to restrain his anger. He hadn't broken the deal, not willingly, at least. He had left everything in their apartment, Stick would have known that!

-I... So... Sorry... Matty... I didn't... He... Karen...-

-It's ok, Foggy. It's ok. Calm down. You're hyperventilating- Matt released him from the hug to let him breathe easily, but he didn't interrupt their physical contact. He could feel Foggy needed it -You did the right thing. You have nothing to apologize for. Calm down. Just breathe.-

Matt let him have the control of his breath back before leaving him to look for some water. That wasn't easy, but somehow he managed to do that without breaking anything. On his way back he met Foggy's hand, guiding him back to the mattress, where he laid. His head took the peace offer and stopped the spins,

-Thank you, Matty, but please, stay quiet... You have to rest-

-We have to go back to Hell's Kitchen as soon as possible-

-No-

-Foggy. Karen's in danger! If She get Stick angry...-

-I know. He will beat her. I've experienced that-

-Did he hurt you?-

-Nothing I can't handle. Listen to me, Little Horn. We have to go back, and you'll probably have to leave again with him, but, before that, you'll take your time to recover!-

-There is no time, Foggy-

-There is no time for what?- asked Claire entering the house with two bags in her hands..

-We have to go back to New...-

-No way, Matthew- she cut him off, dropping them near the couch -Whatever this Stick had done to you, it took me two days to bring you back and, still you've jumped when you've heard me, when you should have been able to notice me at least three blocks ago-

-Thank you, Claire- Foggy blessed her.

-Claire...-

-Don't Claire me, Murdock...-

-Let me explain, at least- he was practically begging her, begging both of them, actually.

* * *

Claire didn't want to allow him to explain, because he would come up with such a damn good reason that she would let him go, no matter what Foggy (or the nurse inside her) would say.

But she had to admit that part of her really wanted to know what had happened and who was this Stick that was able to mess Matt up in this way. She had seen him half dead more than once, neither Fisk nor Nobu were able to drive him on the edge of madness like he had.

The nurse sighed, then nodded.

-Just nodded- she specified when she realized he hadn't felt her, or whatever was the right verb to describe his different way of seeing. -But- Claire added -After that you are going to take your medicines and some painkillers...-

-Ok… Now can I…-

-Not so fast, Little Horn - she broke off, calling him the funny name Foggy had dubbed him. She cracked into a smile when she saw his reaction to that, a mixture between amusement and exasperation, his lips lifted in that adorable smile she used to love -You are going to let me check your bruises-

-But there is no…-

-Say that again and I am going to give her permission to anaesthetize and tie you up until you have fully recovered!- Foggy interrupted -Here is the deal, counsellor Murdock: we let you tell your story, you let her do her job with you-

-Do I have a choice, at least?- he dared to ask.

-Nope- The sound of his friends' voices, answering him at the same time finally convinced him to give up.

-I want to fix a condition, counsellor Nelson-

-Speak up-

-In the meantime, Claire will check you over. You said Stick has hit you. I want to be sure you are ok-

-Deal-

Matt raise his right hand and let Foggy shake it. Claire laughed with disbelief.

-Are you two for real?-

-Nelson & Murdock, baby- the blond lawyer winked -Avocados at law-

-If I will ever need a lawyer, please remind me not to call the blind vigilante and his best friend. I'm not sure fruits will be allowed in court- she laughed, approaching Foggy. She was glad to see Matt laughing. He still was pale, and from the way he was moving she could guess his powers and strengths were not fully back yet, but at least he was able to stay conscious.

\- Foggy.- she ordered -on the couch. Shirt off. Matt. Start talking-

-Are you so harsh with all the men you take home?-

-Only with the ones who mess up with crazy criminals and get beaten up-

Matt choose exactly that moment to cut off every joke. He started talking from the beginning, when he was 9. His voice was steady and calm, but Claire could tell how difficult it was for him because all the while he kept his face pointed toward the ceiling, his eyes shut, the hands closed in fists so tight the knuckles had turned white. By changing the order of the words this sentence flows better

Every once in a while, while she was checking on Foggy, she had met his eyes. He was as upset as her, so she guessed that he was probably listening to that story for the first time too. They both where touched by what they were listening to, but they didn't have the courage to say a word.

It was now harder for the blind guy to keep talking, and his voice had broken often, forcing him to take deep breaths before going on.

-That's all I know. That's why I have to go back-

-Matt, you are going to get yourself killed-

-Better me than Karen- he sentenced -How's Foggy?-

-He is going to be ok- she reassured him. -Foggy, how much time do we have?-

-To do what?-

-To get him in a condition where he won't die as soon as he goes back-

-Do you agree with him now? Seriously?-

No, she didn't, actually, but she knew Matt well enough to know he was going back to Hell's Kitchen no matter what, so the best thing she could do was treat him as best she could in the time they had left. She didn't want to wake up the next morning only to discover he had escaped during the night.

-We can't stop him, you know better than me. And we can't leave your friend in Stick's hands, so...-

-Thanks, Claire...-

-Shut up, Little Horn, I just making sure your death will not be on me. Have you taken your medication, yet?-

He hadn't, he actually didn't want to, but she forced him anyway. His fever had risen and she wanted avoid a second bath if it could be possible.

* * *

Matt was trying to think about what to do.

Claire was right about everything. Even if he had managed to get to New York, he would probably be unable to survive until the first mission (assuming that he would live after the incoming beating "made in Stick") in his actual condition, but he wanted to have Karen released as soon as possible.

-Foggy?- he called

-What is it?-

-Call Stick. I wanna talk to him-

He didn't really want to, but maybe he could convince him to be patient enough not to hurt her for a few days, plus, he had to admit he was a little bit scared. Stick had always told him he was a weakling because when he beat Matt harder than usual, pushing the boy to his limit, it had always ended with the kid unable to walk to the orphanage, and now, years later, he would have to confess he had collapsed in a church, and he had to let Claire out of the equation, or it would be difficult to believe that was a coincidence.

-Are you sure?-

-I have to-

Everything was getting confused around him, damn paracetamol. Fever was slowly dropping, but side effects were having a party in his already messed up head.

-I'll speak to him, ok? Why don't you sleep a little and let drugs do their job?-

But Foggy was right and the part of his mind still working was basically begging to listen to him and be quiet at least for a while, even if forever would be better. He fought with it for a moment, then it played the spin-and-sickness card and Matt decided to leave the table and the party.

-Leave Claire out of this-

-Sure. Don't worry, buddy. I'm on it-

-Ask...to speak…-

-With Karen. Of course. Sleep-

* * *

Matt didn't need a second invitation. A couple of minutes after he was already sleeping, and Foggy gave a sigh of relief. In all those years of friendship he had seen a lot of Matt Murdock, including how sensitive he had always been to side effects of medicines, so he was glad he was able to sleep despite the situation.

-How is he?- Claire inquired.

-Paracetamol 1 - Matt 0- he informed her -He has fallen asleep-

-Are you really going to call him? That Stick-

-Yeah. I don't want to push my luck too much. I've already done so once and here we are. So, yes-

Claire nodded. She hadn't said much since Matt had finished his story. She had checked over Matt's bruises and fever, then she went to her bedroom muttering something about changing the sheets and she had stayed there until… well, until that moment.

-Claire? Is everything ok?-

-It will be… I just need time to digest well… you know-

-I can understand... If you don't want to listen to the call I can go somewhere else. I can go out-

* * *

Once again Claire was impressed by Foggy's great sensitivity. She shook her head.

-No. Please, stay. I'll just go into my bedroom, ok?-

-You sure?-

She nodded again, wondering if he would suddenly have some kind of superpower too. The nurse had always thought herself quite good at hiding her feelings, but somehow she was completely transparent to him.

-No, wait. It's probably better if you take the room. That way I can keep an eye on Matt-

-Uhm… ahm. Right… ok. Thanks- Claire smiled at his embarrassment and sat on the couch, looking at Matt. He was sweating a lot, but she wasn't worried about that. She moved the blanket from him, and his unconscious sigh of relief made her lips curve into a smile. She was glad he couldn't feel her right now. His words were seared into her mind , she could almost see in his head the little Matt Murdock, with his sweet eyes, being trained into a soldier, into what would become first the Man in the Mask and then Daredevil.

She had told him he was the son of Hell's Kitchen, that he had became what that city needed, now she knew the truth.

-I don't give a shit! Matt is not going anywhere but here!- Foggy's voice suddenly came to her ears, louder and rougher than before. She raised from the couch and joined him into the bedroom. The lawyer was standing near the window, and he was getting angry. -And I want to speak with Karen in 5 minutes!- He finished hanging up the phone with an angry leap of his thumb. Her figure might have been reflected by the glass of the window, because he turned toward her almost immediately. -Sorry- he apologized -I didn't mean to yell-

-Is everything ok?-

-I don't know… I really can't understand this guy, you know? How in Hell's name is it possible that he doesn't care about Matt?-

-You are talking about the piece of crap who took a blind kid from an orphanage in order to make him a soldier, you know that, right?-

For the first time Foggy seemed to think about it.

-I guess that explains some things…- Foggy's phone started ringing. He picked up, suddenly tense. Moving only her lips without giving out a sound, Claire told him to put him on the speaker. He simply nodded. -I want to speak with…-

-Foggy!-

-Karen! Are you ok?- he asked, unable to hide the relief in his voice. But it was a male old voice that answered him

-You've heard her now, boy. Now move your fat ass and bring that fucking kid here before you need to find a new secretary too.-

That voice. That must be Stick. And the way he was speaking about Matt, as if he were an object, made her decide that she had enough of listening.

-Listen to me, asshole.- She spoke up - Matt can barely stand on his feet. He will be useless to you and I'm not letting him going anywhere, so, do us all a favour; release the girl, leave all of us alone and go back to your damn war!- and this time, she was the one hanging up the call. She raise her eyes only to see Foggy looking at her as if she were some kind of alien… and Matt's laugh from the living room.

-Awesome. Now he's gonna kill everyone of us- Foggy complained while they were reaching for Matt, who had woken up and was sat on the mattress.

-Oh, I don't know...that was cool, by the way.- His words made her flush, but for a second she could see a flash of anguish in his eyes, a blink he was very quick to hide. He was just trying to not be terrified for what she had just done, even if Claire already knew that it wasn't her best idea ever. -He's going to be pissed off, but he will be impressed, too. But, still, we have to go-

-Nope-

-I'm ok. I promise.-

-Then we are coming with you, and if you say no I will make you sleep for the rest of the week.-

-I understand now why you like her, Matty. She is Stick, only with boobs-

* * *

Thanks for reading so far! Rewievs are always welcome, positive or negative! They help me improve, I don't eat anyone, I promise :)


	11. Foggy Nelson, avocado at law

**A/N:** Hi everyone! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing so far!

I'm going on holiday in a few hours, and I will be away until the 24th August (seaside and Rome are waiting for me :)), so I think chapter 12 will be online on 25th or 26th, I have no idea if it is a monday/tuesday but I'll do that anyway… so… for the ones going on holiday, have fun and… see you soon!

PS: As usual, I don't eat people who write reviews. :)

PPS: Thank you so much InsertImaginativeNameHere :)

* * *

 **Chapter 11: Foggy Nelson, avocado at law.**

* * *

Once the decision was made, little time had passed before they had all got into Claire's car, on the road to New York.

None of them had any baggage, even if Claire had taken some medicines and the thermometer with her. Both insisted on making Matt lay down on the back seat, with ice on his forehead, hoping that would help keep his fever under control.

Foggy was glad to see him falling asleep, eventually. It would not be a long trip, but he had seen first-hand how harsh Stick could be and he was sure Matt would need all the strength he could pick up to survive his mentor's anger.

-Is he sleeping?- Claire asked

-Yes.- Foggy was trying to speak as low as possible in order to not disturb his friend, but he wished he could shout or punch or whatever would help him to feel better. He was nervous and when he got nervous he usually also got very noisy, in a very annoying way. Now, all he could do to take it out was to tap repeatedly the floor of the car with his heel.

-Are you ok?- Foggy didn't respond, biting his lips to force himself to be quiet. It wasn't the right time to ask him if he was ok. He jumped when he felt Claire's hand taking his, in a sympathetic gesture. He looked at her and saw a sad smile. -I know. I'm scared too-

-He's not going to survive all this. You know that?- he managed to whisper, his hands closed in fist. He was fighting to hold back his tears.

-He is strong, Foggy. I know he isn't in the best shape, but he is strong-

-I'm not worried about his body. Stick is going to make him kill someone to punish him. And that son of a bitch is going to use us to force him to obey.-

-You can't know that. Maybe… maybe he is just going to beat him…-

-... to death. That's not better- his words sounded more bitter that he had intended. With that he threw his tears away, repressing his sobbing.

Suddenly Claire stopped the car and opened the door. She walked all around the vehicle and reached for his too, inviting him to get out with a resolute movement of her hand. He obeyed and she locked it with his friend still inside, windows closed to protect him from the cold.

-Foggy- she begged taking his hands -Please. Stay strong. Cry now if you have to, but Matt needs us. He needs you. Now more than ever-

-I… I can't do that, Claire. I… just… he is the stronger one. He always has been. I'm just supposed to be… the funny one-

-I know Foggy. I know, trust me. But I also know how important you are to him. He can't survive this if you aren't there to give him the strength he needs. He was with him for a month without you, and you've seen the results, and trust me, you didn't see the worst part of it. So, please. I am begging you. Do whatever you need to calm down, then be Matt's Daredevil-

Foggy held her hands tight, then tried to find something to say, to convince her he wasn't that kind of man. He wasn't strong, and he certainly wasn't a man without fear. He hadn't kept Karen safe and he was taking his best friend right into the hands of a man who could tear his soul apart for good this time, who could kill the angel inside Matt leaving only the devil in charge, and he couldn't do a damn thing to stop all this. -Foggy- Claire insisted - You can do this. You have to try, at least. Matt's worth a try.-

She was right. Matt had done so much for him since the day they met. He had made of him the lawyer he had become. He had deserted him once, there would be not a second time.

Finally, he nodded.

-I'm sorry, Claire. Thank you-

She smiled again, patting his cheek. Foggy could fully understand now why Matt had fallen in love with her. She was strong and resolute, but at the same time sweet, and absolutely beautiful. She reminded him of that greek girl, Elektra, but while at that time he could feel something wrong, Claire was pure light, as if she were the other side of the coin.

-Are you ok?- she asked softly.

-I will be. Let's go. Matt is going to freak out if he wakes up and discovers we have stopped-

-We are still stopping. We all need to eat something, including Matt-

* * *

It took them 5 hours to cover the 212 miles that separated Boston from Hell's Kitchen, one and half hours more than the time estimated by the GPS on their smartphone, but Claire and Foggy had taken any chance to stop and gain some time for Matt. Soon they had to replace the ice with Claire's spare t-shirt. That meant that the had to stop a lot of times to soak it in order to keep his forehead fresh.

The blind guy had slept for most of the trip, waking up only to eat and drink, basically. He had told them to not stop so frequently because of him, but they had simply ignored him.

-Where should I go?- Claire asked Foggy the moment they entered finally in Hell's Kitchen

-My… my place- A still half-asleep Matt answered her, putting himself in a sitting position. -I… have to change my clothes… we have to… leave Claire-

-No way, Matt! I'm com…-

-This time he's right, Claire. We can't put you in danger, plus, we are going to need you-

The nurse sighed, and Foggy knew they had won this time. She drove to Matt's apartment and they let Matt have a shower.

Foggy hugged her one more time.

-Thank you, Claire. For everything.-

-Keep an eye on him, please. And if you need help, find a way to call me, ok?-

-I will. You stay out of trouble, ok?-

-That's why I left- she smiled at him.

* * *

She didn't want to leave them like this. She had wanted to go with them and stay with Matt, to make sure he would keep taking his medication and that there would be someone (her) able to stitch him up.

 _Stop lying to yourself. You just want to stay with him because you feel something for him!_

She silenced her inner voice the moment Matt came out from his bedroom. He was wearing again his black suit, and the contrast with the dark outfit was making him appear even paler than he already was.

-I arranged my bed for you, and I left some money so you can buy some food-

She hugged him too, and she felt his arms around her chest holding her tight, his face against her head. She allowed herself to rest hers against his torso for a while, listening to his heart. She barely noticed Foggy had left the house, leaving them alone. -Thanks, Claire-

-Promise you won't get yourself killed, Matt-

-I'll try. I promise.-

* * *

And he meant it, with all his heart.

-I'll be there for you, ok? You just have to call me-

Her arms were soft, strong and warm at the same time, and he felt he wasn't ready to leave, yet. But he had to think about Karen, too, and as long as time passed, the more the probability of Stick's finishing his patience rose. Matt forced himself to let her go.

-You can stay here as long as you want- he said -but I don't blame you if you want to go back to Boston-

* * *

His words made her take the craziest (and possibly worst) decision she had ever made in her life. She said it out loud before her brain could elaborate it and try to talk some sense into her.

-I am not leaving you, Matt. As soon as possible you buy a phone and text me where you are. Understood?-

-It's too dangero…-

-Shut up, Little Horn. You'd better do that, or I swear I will offer myself to this Stick as an hostage-

Ok, maybe that one was the worst idea of her life.

* * *

Her heart was steady. God, she wasn't lying about that. He sighed and heard her smile. She knew she had won that battle. He held her again.

-I am not going to put you in danger- he answered. Her heartbeat changed, so he tried to negotiate to prevent her objection -I'll let you know if I am all right, but I don't want you in the firing line. I know I can't stop Foggy, probably I don't want to either…but you...-

-Matt. I'm begging you… I don't care what you have to do, but don't cut me out, please.-

Only God knew how much he had wanted to kiss her in that moment. Instead, he released her from his embrace.

-I… have to go now-

He heard the air moving, making him perceive her small nod. She took his hand and placed something in it. He could feel the plastic and the typical form of a blister pack.

-Take them- she ordered, and her tone made him smile. To him it was funny to hear it: a small, innocent pretty girl giving order to Daredevil. He didn't reply to that. Medicine and the world on fire weren't exactly best friends, and his head was the ring of their fight. -Matt. I am serious-

-I know, Claire. I'll take them when Stick lets me rest, ok?-

Definitely not ok to her, he felt it, but she sighed and nodded.

-It's still better than a no, I guess-

Matt understood her concern, he truly could. He had felt the same way every time Foggy had got sick, but he couldn't take medicine before going out on a mission. He wasn't even really sure his mind would be clear if he had taken drugs after the mission and then slept all the day long, but she was right: he had to take fever low somehow. He had to take that risk.

He smiled, again, making his best puppy-eyes for her to make her laugh...and punch him on his arm, then made his way to the door.

Foggy was waiting for him on the sidewalk, and Matt could feel his disappointment. He was going to say something and the blind guy was afraid to know what...

-No good-bye sex?- Exactly. He wasn't in the mood for that. Now now. Not when he really was regretting to not have kissed her.

-Shut up and lead the way-

* * *

Karen jumped awake when she heard Matt and Foggy's voices. She didn't know exactly how much time had passed since the last time she heard the blond speaking to her, but after the phone call they let her go to the bathroom and didn't tie her up again, which was a great improvement.

The cell was so small she couldn't do much more, anyway, but at least she could find a better position to lay on that damn bed and have some real rest.

 _You were dreaming, Karen_. She told herself, but the surge of adrenaline had threw away the sleep completely. Then she heard that again:

-Stick, I'm here. Leave Karen and Foggy alone-

Matt. No.

But what really scared her to death was the sudden noise that followed his friend's voice, like if something had been smashed against the window. Than came Foggy's voice, loud, and terrified.

-MATT!-

* * *

God bless dumpsters and whoever had invented them.

Matt had never been so happy to have his mouth and nose overwhelmed by the stink of the trash who had just softened his fall from the second floor of that damn building.

He had just discovered that his body needed some time to work off paracetamol. A lot of it, actually.

He didn't hear Stick's kick until it had hit his chest and, a second later, his back was smashing the window. The lawyer had just the time to hear Foggy shout and let a scream out of his mouth before the harsh landing. Stick had literally thrown him outside the building.

If this was the prologue, that could be his last day on this Earth.

A tumble next to him and the rising of the smell told him Stick had just land… A second cry from Foggy and he found himself hitting the asphalt. He cried when broken glass coming from the window got their way more deep into his skin and muscles.

-Matty!-

His best friend voice coming from the now opened window covered Stick's steps toward him, and he found himself rolling and then falling on the asphalt after one more kick. He was too slow, too weak. He couldn't fight. He let Stick give him one of the greatest beatings of his life.

* * *

-Matt! Matty! Come on, Wake up-

Foggy. Pain.

There was a war inside in head. He wanted to open his eyes, reassuring his friends he was ok, in pain but, still ok. He had gone through worse. His back was begging him to fall back into the oblivion of the unconsciousness. There was so much pain.

-Matty…-

His best friend was kind of freaking out, so he forced himself to open his eyes. To him it was useless, but he knew that could be helpful to Foggy. To him, nothing had changed. The world on fire was a chaos of pain, fever and fear. He could feel pieces of glass into his back, the sorrow coming from them so high it shielded everything else.

-Matt?- there was a hand caressing his hair. That was the first thing he noticed. He knew that hand and, even if it wasn't the hand of a young nurse capable of calm him down only with her presence, he still was relieved to recognize Karen. He started from that contact to regain control of his mind and body.

All his muscles were tensed; he forced them to relax, and, when he managed to do that, pain began to mitigate, leaving him sweat and tired as if he had got hit by a truck. He couldn't get a clear image of what was around them. He could hear no one else beside them was in the room. There were other heartbeats, many of them, but they were far away. Everything else was confused, and he didn't even try to process all the info his senses were providing to him. He was to tired and probably he wouldn't find anything useful. He focused on the basic.

He was lying with his belly on the floor, and someone had covered him with a blanket or a jacket. Foggy's heartbeat was at his left, while Karen on the opposite side.

-Are you with us, buddy?-

-Yeah.- he tried to lift beyond the pain, but Foggy's hand forced him to stay down, pushing him gently to the ground. He hissed in pain. The pressure disappeared instantaneously.

-Sorry, man- his friend apologized -But you'd better hold down... And still-

\- It... Hurts- he tried to speak, but every breath felt like if someone were playing darts using his back as a bull's eye, and speaking was nearly impossible. He tried to focus on the agony's hot spots. God. They totally resembled like big darts, or some kind of blades. He raised a hand, trying to reach for the one he felt in his shoulder, pain spreading in all his body.

-No, no, no. Matt. Still. Hold still. Matty. Please.- his hand was forced by Foggy's to go back to its place, away from its aim.

-What...- first... - In...- second...- Back?- and the third dart hit his bull's back. -What...- a second player joined the first. -happened?-...two -Where...- three.

-Matt. Please. Stop... Stop talking- Karen's voice was shaking, all he could hear from her were panic and concern.

-Stick threw you out of the window- Foggy's seemed to be quite calm, but if he focused, he could hear his heartbeat clipping along. -then jumped after you... And...God. I thought you were dead. He kept hitting you, but you weren't fighting him back... You have glass in your back, so please. Hold still.-

Foggy was probably right, but he couldn't stay with those things inside.

-Take... out...pl...- he could feel the third dart. Everything was black and oblivion again.

* * *

Take them out? That Murdock should have taken a bad kick on his head. How in the hell were they suppose to treat those kind of injuries without…. well anything.

Foggy was glad had lost his senses, hear his attempt to talk had been a real agony. He looked at Karen without leaving Matt's hand.

-He needs help- she said shyly, perfectly knowing she was pointing out the obvious, but, seriously, what else could she say or do, except killing him (or them) for not telling her the truth since from the beginning?

-I know. I know, Karen- His voice came out low and exhausted, but, still, they had to do something.

 _Be Matt's Daredevil_. Claire's words echoed in his head. He was almost wetting his pants with fear, but an idea had just come into his mind, and he decided to move on with that before his brain could turn on. -Karen. Stay with him and whatever happens, protect him. Promise me-

-What?- But he wasn't listening to her anymore, he hadn't even waited for her to answer. He stood and started punching the door with both his hands, crying Stick's name at the same time. Eventually, after a while, the man opened the door. Foggy knew he was blind, since birth, not like Matt, but he could swear that freaking man was staring at him, his face… well he had never seen him before with a different expression. He was angry, and all in his posture had the aim to making people feel uncomfortable (and reaching it, for the record). The man was standing right in front of him, silent, as still as a statue.

 _It's just a tirade. You can do that_. And Foggy Nelson, avocado at law, started talking. And it was just like the first time he went to Landman and Zack for Mrs. Cardenas. It was perfect, and amazing. Words simply made their way straight from his brain to his mouth without hesitating or taking wrong roads in their journey.

-Now, listen to me. I can't even imagine how in the Hell's name you could do that such a thing. Beating him is terrible, but if I make a big effort I can almost understand it. But you threw him out of a fucking window. This is insane. Now, you can have a charge for attempted murder and kidnapping, or you can listen to me and make a deal-

 _Or you can just dismiss me in the same way and let me die in that dumpster._ He finished the line in his mind.

He looked at the man, the dread long gone. He waited.

-You really are a pain in the ass- Stick eventually fumed -What do you want?-

-Two weeks for Matt to recover. To be treated properly. And Karen will stay with him- Foggy didn't hesitate -I will stay here as a warranty-

-One week-

-He has fucking glass in all his back!-

-One week or he stays here and you will watch him die in front of you. And when he comes back, I'll punish him again. That's the deal.-

-When he comes back- Foggy bargained over -You'll beat me instead of him-

Stick didn't reply in a short time. He was considering the proposal. Eventually, he arrived at the conclusion that Foggy had hoped he would reach: it might be a worse punishment for Matt hearing his best friend being beaten than be the victim.

-Deal- Stick left the room and the lawyer heard him call for his ninja guys and tell them to prepare Matt's transfer.

Foggy turned toward Karen. She was looking him as if he had gone mad, but he ignored her gaze and her attempt to say something. He cut her off even before words could came out of her already open mouth. They didn't have so much time, and he wanted say all he could.

-Karen. Take him to his place, ok? And promise me you will stay with him.-

-He needs a hosp…-

-Karen. Trust me ok? I know you don't right now, but I need to know you'll do as I say. For Matt-

She was still looking at him, then her gaze shifted to their friend's back. The skin visible through the cuts in his shirt was turning red, and Matt's breath was accompanied by low but frequent unconscious moans of sorrow. Finally, she nodded, the moment the ninjas came in.

She was forced to stand and exit the room, the warriors with Matt followed suits, leaving him alone.

He sighed in relief.

 _I did it, Claire_. He thought. _Now it's up to you._

Only after a while he realized he had just offered himself as a hostage for an entire week while Matt and Karen would go home and get him back on his feet.

Oh well, the deal was already made by now.

He just hoped they would feed him properly.

* * *

Thanks for reading!


	12. Darts and glass

**A/N:** here I am again! I came back from Rome a few days ago, and I discovered it's a beautiful city! By the way, thanks to everyone for reading (and rewieving) so far.

Thanks again to my beta InsertImaginativeNameHere for her amazing job!

* * *

 ** _CHAPTER 12: Darts and glass._**

* * *

He was living in a world of pain. Pain and fog. Fog and pain were covering everything around him.

The darts game might be turned into a tournament because there were at least twenty people throwing darts against his back. He really wanted to know who'd had this crazy idea of putting a bull's eye on it. Foggy, probably. Or someone else at the bar.

-Matt? Are you there?- Karen's hand was on his head, caressing his hair, but somehow her voice sounded strange to him. -Matt?-

He tried to say something, but speech was nearly impossible to him. He ordered his eyes to open and his hand to move slightly, very slightly. If he'd limited his movements to those little things, the players wouldn't be bothered and wouldn't fling darts so hard. They calmed down, and he finally could try to focus on that hand. It didn't really feel like his secretary, but it wasn't Foggy either. It totally looked like…

Panic grew into him, when he realized the voice he had connected to Karen was not his secretary's one.

-No. No. No. Matt. Matt calm down. Calm down.- Claire urged, her hand leaving his hair to reach his cheek, caressing it, the other one taking his -It's ok. It's your place. Feel it, come on. Focus- She had just put something in his hand. It was one of his dad's boxing gloves.

He held them tight, ignoring the darts tournament. Screw them. Next time they could use a wall. That helped him to calm down and focus. He relaxed his muscles, and the pain began to mitigate. He remembered Foggy's words. Right. No darts. Stick and glass. A lot of glass, actually. In his back.

-Matt. I need you to stay still right now. It's going to hurt. Can you handle this?-

He nodded. Anything would be better than glass stabbing his flesh. He felt something on his mouth. A fold. He started fighting. -Matt. It's ok. Open your mouth. It's just a t-shirt.-

Claire was speaking him in that kind of voice that could make him doing everything she asked. It was honest and sweet. He obeyed and the cotton rag was placed into it. -Bite this when you are in pain, ok? You have to stay very still if you don't want me to anesthetize you-

He nodded and braced himself for pain. He felt the first rush, then nothing.

Nothing was a good thing, actually. Nothing didn't hurt.

* * *

The nurse sighed in relief when Matt passed out.

-That's the best you can do? Put a shirt in his mouth and hope he passes out?- Karen was sitting on the floor, near to the couch when the ninjas had left Matt. She had jumped when the girl suddenly had come out from the wardrobe and without giving her the time to elaborate what was going on, had begun to cut the guy's shirt to check him.

She had watched her going pale at the sight of his wounds, then regaining control and starting to talk to him. She had been silent until that moment, too confused and scared to speak, but now anger had taken the upper hand.

-He doesn't want drugs of any kind- the woman responded without taking her eyes off Matt, her hands were moving slowly around his back. -And if he bites something he can stay still. So, yes, that's all I can do to keep him collaborative. Are you Karen?-

-And who are you? Stick's little whore?- It wasn't probably the best way to keep herself safe, but she couldn't refrain from being aggressive, not with Matt like this and Foggy hostage of that beast. On a better day, Karen would probably think that if she'd worked for Stick she didn't need to hide herself in a closet, but that was not a good day, and Karen wasn't in the mood for such details.

The nurse (suddenly Karen remembered her from the night of the explosion) didn't respond to that, too focus on taking out a very big piece of glass from the blind man's back. Five or six of them were lying in a plate she had found in the kitchen cupboard. Maybe it was real luck Matt had passed out at the first one. Karen keep her breath, fearing that her words would lead to payback on her employer, but she was professional and as delicate as she could be.

-That was the last one- she announced after three more pieces, wiping the sweat from his forehead with the sleeve of Matt's shirt she was wearing.

-So? You are the one Stick calls when he almost kills his best soldier?-

-Foggy didn't tell you anything?-

-Foggy offered himself as a hostage to Stick in order to buy some time for Matt to recover-

-I don't work for Stick, ok?- the nurse turned toward her, reaching out for the young man's hand in the mean time. She didn't seem so surprised about the glasses she had just extracted from his back -I've never even met that guy. I am just the lucky girl who found a blind guy with a black mask dying in her dumpster on her night off, ok? And my name is Claire, by the way-

Karen managed to smile, despite the situation, beside, she had been nice

-I usually find dead sewer rats. A handsome guy is not that bad-

* * *

Claire smiled at the joke. She had never thought about it in those terms, but she guessed it was not that far off. She stood and covered Matt with a blanket.

Two hours had passed since Matt and Foggy had left, and Stick in that short time could almost kill him. Foggy was right. She invited Karen in Matt's kitchen to let him rest and made a tea for both of them.

-What happened?-

-I don't know. I just heard a crash, then Foggy was shouting. After a while, Stick's ninjas came in with Matt like this, and Foggy has made a deal with them. He would stay and Matt has won a week off from whatever he was doing with that crazy man-

While she was listening to her, Claire was playing absentmindedly with one of the bloody pieces of glass she had removed. She looked at it for the first time and she didn't take long to recognize that was a kind of glass fiber used for windows. She frowned at it, setting it down on the plate again, concentrating on the blonde woman in front of her.

-Are you ok? Are you hurt?- the nurse asked.

-Eh? No… no. I'm ok. Just bruises. How's Matt?-

-It should be ok… if he doesn't freak out when he wakes up and finds what Foggy has done. I gave him something for the fever, too and I am seriously considering the possibility of making him sleep for the rest of the week if he doesn't stay quiet-

Karen smiled, but her hands were shaking slightly. She was probably scared or angry, or both, and she could understand that. -So…- Claire asked to break the silence between them. -Do you know who he is?-

-I know now. I have no idea how he does it, but he saved my life.-

-Aren't you...pissed with him?-

-With him. And with Foggy. But I'll deal with that when everything will be all right. I'm not a monster. I don't want to kick the ass of a half dead man-

Claire laughed. She liked Karen, she was strong, and funny. Not the princess-in-danger-please-save-me kind of girl. She seemed the kind of girl Matt could fall in love with, she thought drinking her tea.

Why was she even thinking about something like that?

-Are you seriously going to make him sleep for a week? He is hurt, he's going to be quiet anyway-

Claire couldn't do anything but laugh again, but only because laughing was still better than getting angry thinking about how hard it would be keep Matt on that couch after telling him his best friend was Stick's prisoner. -What's so funny?-

-The night I met him first, his lung had collapsed, but still, after an hour he was back on the streets, fighting some Russians who had kidnapped a little boy. So no. It's going to be everything but quiet-

Karen turned her face toward the couch. Claire followed her gaze, anger rising in her chest. Matt was still out, his mouth slightly open after she had taken off the shirt, his back full of fresh stitches and gauzes were covering his minor injuries. If she was right, Stick might have thrown him out of a window and then, probably, he had also hit him, like, a lot. That, or Matt hadn't even try to defend himself. Claire closed her hand into a fist, breathing slow to try to calm down.

-Fo...Fog…- Matt's voice was a bit more than a whisper, Claire was sure it was real just because Karen had went pale hearing that. The lawyer was perfectly still, his eyes closed. The nurse wasn't even sure he was awake. She approached him cautiously, standing a hand to prevent Karen from following her. She wasn't sure about Matt's reaction and she couldn't afford one more patient right now. -Fog… he...help…-

-Matt?- Claire kept some distance between herself and Matt. -Matt? Are you awake?- she was only whispering, but he would hear that. She was sure. Finally, he opened his eyes.

-Cla… ca't… mo..-

That was bad. The freaking the hell out of her kind of bad. She remembered some of the glass had gone very deep inside his chest, and she was wandering if there was some internal bleeding or damage.

-Karen- she said, forcing her voice to be steady - Be ready to call 911 as soon as I say, ok?-

-No… Am...ance-

Claire ignored his plea.

-Little Horn, listen to me, ok? I'm going to use a stethoscope on you. It's going to be cold, and probably it will hurt a little. If I hear something abnormal from your breathing, I'm taking you to the hospital. I can't treat you if I have to open you and drain an internal wound. Deal?-

-D..l-

Claire sighed with relief. Her common sense was begging her to take him to a hospital in that moment, but the deal she had just made was still better than his resolute usual no, so she forced herself to take that as a victory and came back to her job. She laid the ending metallic part of the stethoscope on his back, in correspondence to his lungs, kidneys, bronchus and splin. She heard nothing and cursed.

Matt's lips lifted in response to her swearing. He had won. She cursed again, directly against him this time, making him smile again. She couldn't avoid to smile back.

-W...er-

-Water?- Claire asked. It was difficult to fully understand him right now, but she couldn't ask him to speak more. A small nod told her she was right. She stood just to find Karen coming with a glass and a straw. The blonde gave them to her and stepped back again, giving her room enough to work. Claire kneeled on the floor, near to his head. -Matt. Open your mouth-

He obeyed and she put the straw in it. -Suck it. Slowly- She instructed him, and waited until he finished the water inside it.

-Thanks- it was barely audible, but it still was a full word, and she considered that a good sign.

-Rest- she commanded -You need it-

Eventually, he closed his eyes and passed out again.

Claire looked at Karen and took her from her arm, guiding her to the closest chair gently. She was shaking and she was turning worryingly white.

-Karen? You ok?-

-How...can...you...stand...all this?- the secretary responded, trying to keep her voice steady gripping her arms around her own chest. -it's… terrible. He… isn't even… him… anymore-

-Karen. Listen to me, ok? He is going to be fine. I promise. He just need to rest and calm himself down.-

-He can't even talk!-

-He's scared, Karen, and in pain. Let him some time, ok? Go and get some sleep you, too. You are exhausted. I'm staying right beside him. I promise.-

-I can't… I... - the blonde woman began to cry out loud.

Claire was expecting that. That girl was strong, but in a few days she had been kidnapped, blackmailed and she had found out his blind employer was the masked vigilante who saved her life, and now she had just seen him unable to move and speak. Collapse was inevitable.

Claire made her stand and accompanied her into Matt's bedroom, closing the door behind her. She didn't want Matt to hear this. She hugged her tight, trying to calm her down.

Karen pushed her away from her, and Claire obeyed her wish. She helped her lie down on the pillow, listening to her sobs, without saying a word but neither going anywhere. Eventually, she managed to get her self control back and lifted her eyes toward her.

-I… I'm sorry- she apologized.

-Don't be. It's ok- Claire left her only to come back with a glass of water -Drink. It will help you relaxing and sleeping-

-I can't take it… Matt is…-

-Karen, listen to me. Matt is the worst nightmare of every nurse by himself. Tomorrow I'll have to inform him that is best friend has offered himself as a hostage to protect him. That will turn him in something even worse than a nightmare and me and you will have to watch him like 24 hours and try to prevent him from getting killed by going back to that Stick. So, I really need you to sleep now. I can't do that alone. So, please, Karen. Take some rest…-

Karen sighed, but took the glass and drank.

-It's Matt. He can't be so terrible…-

-You'll find out tomorrow. Now, rest-

* * *

Foggy.

Matt woke up with a start. His head was punching and his back screamed in pain, but, still, he could manage to sit, choking back a moan of sorrow to not wake Claire up.

His head was heavy, but he could still concentrate and think clearly. He recognized the mark of painkillers in it, but not the ones usually left by paracetamol, luckily.

The nurse was sleeping beside him, sit on the floor with her head laying on her arms, using the couch as a pillow. Too late.

Her heartbeat changed and a few seconds later her head raised.

-Sorry- he whispered, aware of Karen's presence, sleeping in his bedroom. Claire smiled to him, her hand reached out his hair, moving a quiff from his forehead. He allowed himself to smile back, before noticing she was nervous and... _wait_. Why in the hell's name couldn't he hear Foggy's heartbeat? And what were they doing in his apartment? -Claire?- he said, the rest of the question suspended somewhere between them. He was fighting to find the courage to question her and, in the same way, he could tell she knew exactly what his next words would be but she didn't want to speak either. -Where… is Foggy?-

The silence that followed his question was long enough to make him almost panic. Claire's hand was still on his head, so she probably noticed it, and that, probably, convinced her to speak.

-Promise me you won't do anything stupid, Matt- she begged him -Promise me that you are not going back to Stick immediately. That you'll wait until you will be better-

Now he was officially in a panic.

-What happened, Claire?-

He heard her take a deep breath before speaking. Then she updated him on what Karen had told her about the last few hours. Matt stayed quiet all the time, listening with his eyes closed. He felt Claire pushing him back on the couch, but he fought her until she gave up. All he could think about right now was Foggy. Foggy, one of most quiet and funny people in the world (when some blind vigilante didn't piss him off, of course), always smiling...and one of the kindest too. Foggy in Stick's hand. Alone.

-Matt?- he fought back his tears.

-I want to speak with Stick- his voice was harsh but steady and clear enough.

Well, not exactly. He wanted to go back immediately, but Claire (and Foggy) were right: he wouldn't survive another jump like that, and he could barely move and being useless to Stick would turn him to nothing more than a target for his anger issues. But he still had to know Foggy was all right and that Stick would keep his word.

-In the morning, Matt. I promise. Now, please, try to relax and sleep, ok?-

That tone again, and he found himself to obey like a good boy. He hated that sweet voice, really. And he hated that adorable smile she gave to him, too, that he knew she was giving him and wished he could see.

-May I have some water, please?- She prevented him from getting up and went to the kitchen. When she came back, Matt was trying to stand again

-Which part of "relax and sleep" was not clear?-

-I wanted to check over Karen. Is she ok?-

-Sit down- Claire pushed him gently on the couch again and put the glass in his hands.

-She is fine. I gave her something to help her to sleep. Oh, and she said when everything is over she is going to kick both your asses. Yours and Foggy's. She seemed quite serious-

Matt couldn't avoid to smile. He hadn't any doubt about it. If she was in a mood to say such a thing, she really was ok.

-You should sleep too- he said, hearing how tired the girl was and feeling guilty about it. Because of him all of his friends, his family, was suffering. Foggy had been taken as a prisoner, Karen too and Claire could barely keep her eyes open right now and he was a total mess and couldn't help any of them.

-Matt. Stop thinking.- With one step Claire was at his side, one arm around his shoulder- It's not your fault. We are all in this mess because we love you, we care about you and we don't want to see you dead or turned in some kind of killer or one of those freaking ninjas, ok?- How did she know that? Was he such an open book? -You have that gaze… the I am a devil one- Yes. He was.

-Claire…-

-Matt. She is right- Karen voice made both of them jump. He heard her come closer and sit herself on the other side of him. -I told this to you before. You are not alone, Matt. And you are not a Devil… you saved my life and freed me from a murder charge, remember?

-And you saved me from the Russians-

-Yeah. Who took you because of me, in the first place-

* * *

Matt was in one of his "I am responsible for all the evil in the world" periods, which Claire had honestly begun to associate as something akin to to menstruation because it was something that came to him every now and then and he seemed unable to keep his thoughts under control.

-By the way. You suck- Karen suddenly spat out.

That was enough to make him start and turn toward her, guilty painted on his face. Claire wanted to step in, but looking at her, something in her expression told her to shut up and see where she wanted to end up with that. She hoped not in a bad way. Claire's heart sunk. Karen was now silent while Matt… _Oh my God_. He looked… lost and helpless… and absolutely cute with his eyes wide open, on the verge of tears. He was keeping his breath, trying to prepare to whatever she would say. The blonde was typing something on her cellphone, in a way Matt surely couldn't 'see', then turned the screen toward her; Claire could read "back me up" on it. -I'm taking it as an insult. Claire?-

What the hell did she mean?

-Me too-

-What?- he managed to ask in the shyest tone she could imagine, barely able to hold his tears. _Please, Karen. If it is a joke cut it off right now… please._

-You are alone, in your place, with two beautiful women taking care of you… you should absolutely be a fucking Devil!-

The sexual innuendo was so clear that Matt became as red as his Daredevil's costume, if not ever redder. How could he possible be even cuter than before? Claire laughed at his embarrassment, and was relieved when it turned into a light laugh, his muscles relaxing a little bit, his sadness thrown away by her joke. Claire hadn't realized how much she had needed something like that too, until that moment. They all had needed it.

Matt's laugh choked suddenly turning into a painful cough. Clare was already there, ready and fast to support him. He was still smiling though, so she assumed he was fine, more or less.

-I hate both of you, girls-

-Fine. Then sleep so you don't have to see us-

-Claire, you know I'm blind, right?-

-Sleep, Little Horn-

-You too, Claire- and he was serious about that. She really needed to rest, by the way, so she nodded.

-I will, Little Horn. I promise. Your carpet is warm and comfortable-

-Wait- Karen said -Matt has a double bed. Why don't you come and sleep with me? There is room for you-

Claire thought about it for just a second, then realized that she would be able to hear Matt even from there, so she nodded.

-May I join you?- Matt asked immediately, not su much innocently. He was rewarded by two pillows thrown against him by the girls. -Ow! I'm still hurt!-

-Good night, Matthew-

* * *

Thanks for reading so far! Feel free to leave a rewiev, or a PM, I don't bite, I promise! :)


	13. Wanna bet?

**A/N** : Hi everyone! sorry for the delay, but as you probably know, the side had been down in the last days... The visit counter was also down, so I don't know how many of you have read the last chapter, by the way I'd like to thank you anyway, also for the rewievs and for having put this into your following/fav. lists!

Oh, and I can't forget to mention my beta InsertImaginativeNameHere. Thank you for everything!

* * *

 _ **Chapter 13: Wanna bet?  
**_

Foggy was quiet. He had been in silence since the moment Matt and Karen left.

Stick had locked him in the room that previously had been Karen's prison.

For someone as talkative as he was, not to talk for that amount of time could be considered a record.

They didn't tie him up, luckily, but they had taken his phone. Time had passed slowly, very slowly with nothing more to do than stare at the ceiling, laid on the bed, his hand under the nape of his neck.

He wondered if Matt was ok, if Claire had managed to perform one of her miracles on him. He was regretting right now not to have added phone calls to his deal with Stick.

 _What is done is done, partner._

 _Oh, hi, Little Horn. I was starting to miss you._

Perfect. Now he was talking to his brain.

It would be a long, long week.

He hadn't realized he had fallen asleep until Stick had woken him up with an energetic shake of his shoulder. He started, choking back a cry of fear just in time.

Something was put at his ear and it took a while to understand it was a phone.

-Five minutes, kid- Stick told. Foggy didn't know if he was talking to him or Matt, but he didn't waste time.

-Matty? You ok?-

-What were you thinking Fog?- Matt wasn't angry. Everything in his voice was screaming about concern and dread. He was scolding him but, behind that, he could hear his unspoken thank you. Well, not exactly a thank you; something more like: you didn't have to do something like this to me because I am able to care of myself and other crap along those lines that Foggy had decided a long time ago to take as a thanks. But what really unleashed his tongue was hearing him speaking in his normal voice. Not in pain (well not so much, at least), not like he was unable to breathe.

-Matty. I'm fine, ok? I'm bored, actually. I'm starting to chat with my brain, and probably it can be considered a little insane that it's answering me with your voice, but beyond that. I'm fine-

-Are they treating you well?-

-It's not exactly a luxurious hotel, but it's ok. I'm untied and they leave me alone basically all day long. Which is the boring part, by the way. Hey, speaking of… do you think they can tell if I start to pull faces at them?-

-Fog. Don't you dare to do such a thing!

-You are such a party-pooper!- Foggy complained, and Matt's laugh was one of the best thing he had heard these days. -But, seriously. How are you, buddy?-

-Claire extracted something like eight or nine pieces of glass from my back, everything's gonna be ok. You'll be free in no time-

-Claire! Are you listening?-

-I'm right here!-

-Restrain him, if you have to, but don't let him leave that house before a week passes, ok?-

-Got it. I'm on it-

-Fog…-

But Stick choose that moment to take the phone back. Time had passed too fast, but it was all that Foggy needed. To hear Matt speaking without choking and make sure Claire (and Karen) would keep him at his apartment.

For this reason (and the fact that man scared him enough to not dare to challenge him) he didn't complain when he was forced to interrupt the contact with his friend.

-Happy?- The man asked down the phone, sarcasm and disapproval radiating from his voice. Foggy focused to try to listen to what Matt was replying, but nothing came to him. His friend was probably speaking in a low voice with the proposal to not be heard from Foggy. All he could see was Stick's face, his cold and unfocused eyes. -Fine. Five minutes per day, kid. Nothing more- The man hung up the phone and looked at him, like he could really see him. Foggy swallowed and made a step back, finding his back cornered against the walls. -I really can't understand why Matt cares so much about you. You are weak, and useless-

Shutting up and taking the verbal punches probably would have been the wisest thing to do, but Foggy realized he couldn't stand Stick's attitude any longer

-Maybe It's because beating people it's not the only thing in Matt's life, plus, I didn't leave him when he started to show he cared about me!-

-He wanted a fucking father…-

-And you wanted a fucking soldier!- Foggy cut him off. He knew that story and he didn't want to hear that bullshit again. It hurt his heart to think about a little kid being trained as a soldier.

-And I am going to have him! You can bet your ass on it, kid-

-Why?- he asked suddenly -You have all these ninjas. Why do you want Matt so bad?-

-Because Matt alone is long way better than all these guys together. He is the key to winning this war-

-Against what?-

-Evil-

-Then why didn't you just ask for his help? Why did you have to kidnap him? You almost destroyed him!-

-Because, your stupid Catholic friend has feelings! I have to turn him in a real soldier-

-Say it loud and clear, Stick. You want to turn him into a killer. That's not gonna happen. No way-

-Wanna bet?-

But Stick didn't leave him the time to answer. He closed the door behind him. The conversation was over, at least for now.

Foggy relaxed his back, leaving the walls support his weight. He unclenched the fists he hadn't known he was keeping and discovered his hands were shaking, but not with fear, with anger.

* * *

-How is Foggy?-

Karen asked him as soon as he had closed the call with Stick. He had tried to make a deal, but whatever Foggy had offered him was still better according to his former mentor, and all he could get was 5 minutes of call once a day.

-Fine… nervous, probably. But fine-

-You can read minds, too?- she asked, and Matt knew that sooner or later he would have to give her some explanation, but in this case there was no need to use his heightened senses.

-No. He was speaking fast, with short sentences. I've known him enough to tell that is his typical behaviour when he is nervous- he answered, starting and hissing when Claire touched one of his bruises with the antiseptic. -Karen. What's the deal between Foggy and Stick?-

The girl paused for a while before speaking. He wouldn't have done it, but her delay and something in her voice made him unconsciously listening to her heartbeat while she explained that Foggy had promised to leave he and Stick do their job after that week. She wasn't lying, not at all, but there was something she wasn't telling him.

-Karen. Tell me everything-

* * *

How in the hell was that even possible? She had always considered herself a decent liar, but Matt had discovered her immediately, was he really blind? She moved only her eyes, looking for Claire's for help.

She wasn't telling him a little detail, the one regarding the punishment. Karen didn't want to reveal that Foggy had offered himself for being beaten instead of him. The nurse was silently asking a question: what's wrong?

-Karen?- Matt's voice created a shiver running down her spine. It was nearer to Daredevil's voice than the lawyer's. It was darker, lower, cold, even and dangerous at the same time.

-Matt- Claire was whispering to his ear, her hand on his tensed shoulders. -She is not the enemy. Calm down-

-It's Foggy.- Matt was now almost whimping -I can't calm down. I really can't-

Karen could understand that.

-Matt… he... - she took a breath, rewatching that scene in her head not for the first time that day -He will be your punishment- She did it. She had said that out loud.

And just like that night at the office, his eyes filled with tears. The only thing she could do was hug him as tight as she dared considering his injuries. He was trembling and sobbing, and she didn't want to imagine what was going on in his mind.

Surprisingly, Claire backed up, leaving them alone, as if she was too upset to stay in the same room with them. Karen hoped it wasn't because of her, but now she couldn't think about her, too, not with Matt like that.

-I… I don't want...to… kill… him- he managed to say from somewhere against her shoulder. She stayed quiet, holding him and caressing his hair

-It's going to be all right, Matt. You'll figure something out. Now, breathe, please. Calm down… calm down. As long as you are here, he is safe, ok?-

Ok. She was quite a bad person. She was using Foggy's position to convince Matt to stay at home as long as possible, but, that was also the truth. Stick couldn't punish him if he wasn't there -They've talked about a beating, by the way. He will live, Matt… We'll take care of him. I promise you, Matt-

His head rubbed against her shirt while he nodded again, controlling his breath to stop the shivers and the cry. She had to admit that, he had an amazing control of his body and mind.

Claire seemed to have vanished somewhere, so Karen stayed with him until he finally managed to fall asleep. She sighed. Sleep was good to recover.

* * *

Claire came back after half an hour, her eyes were red, but she was calm. Karen was in the bedroom, reading the only book not written in braille she had found in the house.

-Claire? Are you ok?- she argued when the nurse let herself fall on her side of the bed.

The nurse shook her head, but put a finger on her own mouth before reaching for her phone.

"I don't want Matt to hear this" she texted "But this is all my fault"

Karen didn't need to write her question: her face was probably clear enough to read, because Claire started tapping on the screen again. "I told him to be Matt's Daredevil… I didn't mean literally though"-

Karen smiled and reached for her hand, squeezing it slightly.

"Not your fault" she wrote "Foggy is the only family Matt ever had before meeting you and me, and Foggy considers him more than a brother. He would have done something like that anyway" then she started speaking again, in a low voice.

-Now, be strong and hold on… this is gonna be a loooong week-

She was rewarded by a smile.

* * *

He had crossed the line

Stick was dead.

By the difference of temperature he could "see" the shape of his own hands on his neck. He had strangled him to death.

Matt fell on his knees, his hands on his ears, trying to shout out the moans of pain and terror of his former mentor, but nothing changed. They were just echoes in his head.

He'd wanted to cry, to scream, to… he didn't even know what anymore.

He had become what Stick had always wanted.

He had become what he had always feared to become.

He had let the Devil out, and he hadn't been able to stop it.

Now he was the Devil.

There was no way back to what he had just done.

* * *

The week had passed and Matt had left his apartment alone during the night, a goodbye message written on the screen of his laptop. He had gone directly to the isolated house Stick had rented.

He had found himself restrained by four ninjas, who prevented him from moving, and he was forced to hear Foggy being beaten. His best friend had been brave. He had tried to not make a sound, but eventually the pain had become too high to handle.

Matt was trying to not listen to his fear, to focus on Foggy's heartbeat to make sure he was not going into cardiac arrest or something like that.

He couldn't tell what had happened after that. Somehow he might have found the strength to free himself and jump between Foggy and Stick, attacking the blind man.

He couldn't remember what he had exactly done after that, like if someone else (or something else) had taken charge of his body.

And now they were here. His whole body was shaking hard after the shock.

-Matty… Matt….- he felt Foggy's hand trying to reach his shoulder, but he shirked. He couldn't let him touch him, not after what he had done. He didn't give up, though and tried to hug him from behind. He fought that gesture

-Stay away from me!- he screamed, his voice almost hysterical.

-Or what? You'll kill me too?-

He had lost Foggy too… As Stick had wished.

-No, Foggy...please...I wouldn't…-

* * *

-Matt! Matt! Wake up!- he suddenly jumped awake and found himself squeezed between Karen's and Claire's arms. He gasped, looking desperately for some air. They released him, without losing the physical contact with his body.

-Stick! I…- Matt was trying to speak and breathe at the same time -Fog!-

-Matt, calm down. Calm down!- Karen was almost yelling, definitely not helpful. Then he heard her voice, her usual whisper, so low.

-Matty. It's ok. It was a nightmare. Calm down… breathe- He opened his mouth to speak, but he felt her finger on his lips -Shut up and breathe- she ordered. -Follow my lead- he felt her hand laid on his chest. As she moved it over, he followed it inhaling air, than released when she gently pushed it against him. She kept going like this, mumbling at his ear at the same time, throwing the nightmare away, promising him everything was ok until he had managed to pull himself back together.

-Sorry, girls- he apologized, using the sleeve of his pajamas to dry away the sweat from his forehead and getting up from the couch that since a week was his bed.

-Are you ok?- Karen asked and he nodded, directing himself into the shower without a single word, cursing himself in his mind.

He had tried to appear confident in front of them, keeping the girls out of his dread, pretending to sleep every time they had passed near his sofa during the night to get some water, forcing himself to laugh at Foggy and his non-stop talking during the 5 minutes Stick had allowed them. And now his mind had betrayed him on the very last day, when his wounds were almost completely healed (well at least most of them). He ran the cold water, pushing his body to stay still under the flow, hands on the wall and head ducked toward his feet.

* * *

Several minutes had passed since they had seen Matt entering the bathroom.

Claire let herself have breakfast and changed her clothes before getting worried. The flow had stopped since a while now, but she couldn't hear any sounds that suggested the man was still alive.

She waited half an hour, then she decided she was cleared for breaking open the door. The bathroom was empty.

-Shit- Karen swore - Where in the hell…-

But Claire had suspicions about his destination.

Matt's attempts to be ok were good, very good, actually, but Claire had knew him enough that she didn't buy his faking, and now she was very concerned about a potential panic attack.

-Karen, please, can you stay here?-

-Where are you going?-

-I have an idea, and, if I am right, he needs medical assistance-

-Why did he leave, then?-

-He didn't want us to see him- Claire explained, already closing the door behind her.

She took her way to the rooftop and smiled when she saw his shape. He was sitting on the edge, with his legs dangling in the air. She didn't move, though, and she didn't approach him. He seemed ok, and she was going back, leaving him alone, when he called her.

-Stay, please-

* * *

Matt heard Claire's heartbeat the moment she had left his apartment, and had followed her steps through the stairs and the door. He had ignored her, he could smell she was only worried about him, but when she was leaving, his mouth had spoken before his brain could shut it up.

-Stay, please-

Her heartbeat changed for relief and something else he couldn't really fully understand, but he knew he was a good change, not as if she were upset or scared. He heard her approaching him, her hesitation when she came close to him and saw the space behind the edge. He couldn't really see it, his radar sense had given him information about the height, but she was actually seeing it, the seven floors between them and the street below. He raised his hands toward her to help the nurse sitting down beside him on it, his torso so dangerously exposed to the air during the whole manoeuvre that Claire gasped a warning. His balance though, was perfect, he was sure he wouldn't fall down. She was slightly shaking despite the fact he was holding her, and soon she changed her position, sitting herself astride, with one foot safe on the roof. His lips side rose in an half smile, teasing her tension, but took her hand to reassure her. He wouldn't let her fall.

They stayed quiet, watching (listening to in his case) the life of New York seven stories beneath them. She hadn't asked why he had escaped or what had been the nightmare about, she was simply holding his hand, comforting him no matter what, making him feel safe.

He took off his glasses, that he had worn almost always since Karen was there. She was his friend and he loved her, but still he didn't feel comfortable without them on when she was around. He sensed Claire smile.

-What's that for?- he asked.

-Can't you tell with your superpowers?- she grinned. He loved the way they had learnt to banter about his enhanced senses. That day, at his apartment, when he had told her about the world on fire, she had taken him completely off-guard with the joke about wanting to punch people. It was a level he hadn't even reached with Foggy, yet. They probably would, of course, because it was Foggy and jokes were probably one of the best part of him, but right now, she was the only one with that capability. And he liked that. More than he was supposed to. Probably. He chuckled.

-You know I can't. Do I have to punch you 'till you tell me?-

-You aren't so brave...-

Suddenly, he wanted to play, to be a normal guy having fun with a friend.

Well, almost a normal guy.

He moved fast, too fast for her to predict what he was going to do. He held her behind her armpits in a strong and safe clinch and let her suspended over the edge. She screamed out loud in surprise and fear, and her hand went over her head, grasping the furniture of his shirt. He laughed hard, all his body focused on supporting her weight, listening to her heart. It took a while for her to follow suit, the time to understand she was safe in his arms.

-Will you speak now?-

* * *

It was all so fast she couldn't realize what he was doing until he had done it. there was nothing but his arms between her feet and the asphalt 35 meters above. Her hands were closed on the t-shirt he was wearing, while the rest of her body had frozen, but she never doubted knew he would never let her fall. She looked at him, and his laugh was so genuine and happy all she could do nothing but imitate him.

-Ok, ok!- she cried -I surrender, I surrender. I'll talk!-

A second later, she was safe on the rooftop, Matt's arms surrounding and supporting her. The adrenaline rush in her body had left her slightly shaking and not so stable on her legs, she could hear her own heart running against his chest, as if it was echoing in it. She looked at him and her hand raised to his cheek, right under his eye. -I've been missing these... Your eyes-

He flushed and gifted her of one of his shy smiles. Claire loved when she managed to break his stoic attitude, the one he felt like he had to keep in front of people he cared about to not make them worry about him.

Although, she didn't ask why he had insisted on keeping his glasses on, she could imagine the reason was Karen and Claire couldn't really blame him, she was even surprised he was comfortable without them in her presence (even if the fact she had saved his life maybe had made things easier to him), but she had truly missed that sweetness in his unfocused gaze.

-Really?- his voice was soft and surprised.

-You know I'm not lying to you- she paused, then looked at them -They are beautiful... -she couldn't stay serious any longer, not without kissing him, at least. -They are cute puppy eyes-

* * *

Matt laughed with her at the puppy eyes, but he could also feel her heartbeat and her temperature rising a little bit, she wanted to kiss him at least as much as he wanted, but for the first time in his life, Matt Murdock held his instinct under control. She wasn't a girl he had met in a bar, she was Claire and he was leaving in less than two hours, plus, she had been very clear before leaving.

His thoughts were interrupted by her lips slightly kissing the corner of his own mouth. It was a soft, shy kiss as if she was waiting for his reaction. And, for a moment, he stood still, too surprised and unable to think, or better, he was thinking to a million things at the same time.

He was going to leave with Stick, the nightmare could become true, they could have no future, Stick could use her...

 _Stop thinking, Little Horn, and kiss this beautiful girl!_

 _Shut up, Foggy Bear!_

But Foggy Bear was right, and his lips immediately found Claire's. It wasn't the kind of passionate kiss able to turn them on. It was soft and sweet, as if both of them were scared of hurt the other one.

-I killed Stick- he didn't know why he was saying that right now, but he felt like he had to say that out loud to someone. -In that dream. He was beating Foggy, and he was screaming so loud he was driving me mad. And I killed him, and maybe all his ninjas... I don't know... Claire...-

She took his face in her hands and began to kiss it slightly almost everywhere, trying to reassure him.

-Shh. Shh. It was a nightmare. It was not real.- she said between one kiss and the next one -You are not going to kill him or anyone else, ok? Calm down, Little Horn-

He managed to smile at that silly, but quite cute nickname (but Foggy would never know he had thought it) and nodded, holding her in a soft hug.

* * *

Thank you for reading so far! feel free to let me know what do you think about this! If you don't feel to write in English I can read also Italian, Spanish, French and German... and I don't bite, I promise :D


	14. Being Daredevil Sucks

_**A/N**_ : HEre I am with the new chapter.. Thank you for reading so far and thanks to zoeperja for her rewiev!

As usual, thanks to my saviour, InsertImaginativeNameHere

Feedbacks are really appreciated ^_^ I don't bite who rewievs, but I might bite who doesn't :D

* * *

 _ **Chapter 14: Being Daredevil Sucks  
**_

* * *

It happened exactly like in his nightmare, only worse.

He had insisted on going back to Stick alone, despite Claire and Karen's protests and objections; he didn't know what his reaction would be once he got there, but he knew for sure he wouldn't be able to leave them. Going away from the apartment had been already too painful, and the kiss didn't help.

He had convinced Claire to go back inside and reassure Karen; he had told her he needed some time alone, instead he had left, jumping from roof to roof until he had found the house he was looking for.

Stick's men were waiting for him, and he hadn't made a stand when they had attacked him; it was useless, they were too many and too well trained, while Matt was still recovering from the forced jump of the last week, and even if his wounds were getting better day by day, he wasn't in the best condition.

They had blocked him on the ground, then lifted him, pulling him on his feet, his hands stuck behind his back, and led him to his former mentor.

Stick didn't say a single word. Matt felt his hand raising, and the ninja executed his order. He was forced again on the floor and four on them blocked his whole body, making sure he couldn't move a single muscle. He choked back a groan of pain when one of them pulled his arm over his shoulders, right where one of the worst bruises was.

He heard Foggy's heartbeat change the moment he was forced into the room, before he was near to panic, but now, all he was feeling was anger. Matt heard him revolting against the ninjas

-Matty! Leave him alone you bastards!-

His sudden strength might have taken them by surprise, or more likely they weren't holding him so tight, thinking he would be terrified enough not to resist them, because Foggy managed to free himself.

-Foggy, run!-

Obviously, he didn't obey him. Matt felt his friend kneeling beside him, his hand reaching his forehead, the only part of his body not covered with ninjas.

-Matt... Matty-

-Foggy. I'm fine. I'm fine. Run, please. Run.-

But now it was useless, Stick was already on his best friend, and he took him only a single move to tackle the blond lawyer right beside Matt.

-Matty- Stick teased him -Please be kind and explain the rules to your buddy here-

His punishment had already begun, and for the first time since the day he had woken up blind, he was experiencing pure, paralyzing terror. -Matty. Don't make me ask twice- Stick's warning was more than enough to force him to talk.

-Don't talk, don't fight back and do as he says- he murmured.

-That's my boy-

-I am not your boy-

-He is not your boy-

He and Foggy had spoken at the same time, Matt as a reflex, Foggy with the precise intent of standing up for him.

Foggy got hit twice, probably just a couple of slaps on his head. Matt tried to rebel against that injustice, but he couldn't move even a finger, and as a result his best friend was struck another blow, strong enough to make him hiss.

-Stick, pl...- he stopped as soon as he felt the air motion of an arm directed on his partner. Stick didn't hit out, though, and Matt heard Foggy's sigh of relief.

-What's the new rule, kid?-

-I break the rules, Foggy gets beat- he recited, his throat hoarsened by fear and tension. His back was aching like hell, but he was trying to ignore his pain. He was cursing Foggy for that fucking deal he had made; he didn't want this, Matt didn't want his friend taking punches for him.

Stick gave a second order and the men that were restraining the blind lawyer left him alone.

-You move a single muscle, Matty, and your friend will pay for you.-

-Matty- he felt Foggy's hand touch his, but he didn't make a move to squeeze it; Foggy's voice was slightly shaking, but still clear with a point of serenity in it that made Matt wanting to cry. It was so genuine, so Foggy-ish, and he didn't deserve all of this: not after Mrs. Cardenas; not after Ben -It's gonna be alright, ok?- the last word was hissed, Stick was now striking him with his cane, but he didn't care, he kept talking to him, moaning when the blind man increased the power of his shots. -Matty, don't worry. I'm gonna be fine. Are you listening to me? Answer me, Matty- Matt didn't want to speak, or to do something that might add more pain to his friend -close your eyes, I know it's usele…. ah… but… please, close them...focus on Karen, only on Karen… shut me out, Matty-

Of course when he said Karen he meant Claire.

That was too much. He just couldn't obey him. He could only pretend to do so, for Foggy's mental stability.

He closed his eyes, but he listened to every single shot, every single heartbeat, moan, groan and scream of pain coming from his best friend, forcing himself to stay perfectly still, to not raise himself and fight Stick as he had done in the dream.

Foggy was trying to make as few noises as possible, until Stick had began to use real violence on him, hitting him with his belt and smashing glasses against his back, and Foggy simply couldn't restrain himself anymore.

Matt was now trembling in a mixture of fear and rage, all the sounds in the world covered by Foggy's voice, by the heat on his skin where it was, by his frightened heartbeat. Every shot was also his own, Foggy's screams penetrated his brain, completely overwhelming it. There was nothing else in the world but his best friend and his sorrow, and Matt was absorbing all of it as if doing so he could somehow soothe what he was feeling.

 _Please, please stop. Please hit me. He is innocent. Please._

Matt wanted to cry, to shout and to beg for Stick's mercy at the same time, but he stayed there and soon he had begun to pray for Foggy to pass out and put an end to all this.

He had lost count of the time that had passed since they had begun. It could be 5 minutes or 5 hours, he didn't know. To him, it had been ages, but eventually Foggy lost his senses, and Stick stopped the punishment.

-Ready to go, kid?-

-Please... Let me say goodbye- yes, he was begging, and no, he didn't care. He wanted to be sure Foggy would be alright, and, yes, hug him and thank him for the last time.

-You have an hour, Matty-

It was way more than he had expected, but he didn't complain about this sudden gift.

He reached for Foggy, who was still laid unconscious not far from him. As delicately as possible, Matt lifted his head and put it on his own thigh, supporting it, and he waited for him to wake up.

 ** _000_**

 _Being Daredevil sucks._

Foggy opened his eyes thinking about that. He had thought he had known what pain was when he was 12 and he had broken his arm after an incident with his bike, but that was nothing compared to what he was suffering right now. His whole body was no more an assembled selection of bones, muscles and organs. It was a mass of pain and blood, with one or two probable internal injuries, but he wasn't sure about that. It took a while for his eyes to focus on Matt's face. He was talking to him, caressing his forehead.

-Foggy? Can you hear me?-

-Being you sucks- he moaned, trying to shift to find a less painful position. He was rewarded by a slight lift of Matt's lips.

-Don't move so much. Be careful- he instructed him, and Foggy could see him moving along with him trying to be helpful somehow, supporting as he tried to put himself in a sitting position, but, at the same time preventing him from doing that too fast -You may feel a little dizzy, that's ok. Tell me if you are going to throw up-

-I am not- he answered, laying his head against the wall behind them and swallowing to convince his organs not to go on an adventure outside his body. Matt was crouched on his side. Dizzy was actually an understatement. -maybe I am-

Matt's hands found his shoulders and his hair. He was gentle but at the same time rude in making him duck his head just in time; blood, food and probably some of his bowels suddenly found themselves on the floor, his entire body shaking with the shock.

-Breathe, Foggy. Breathe. It's ok. It's ok. Breathe-

And he obeyed, following his partner's suggestions. Shortly he began to feel better. He was still in pain but it seemed as if his insides had decided to postpone their holiday.

Matt waited until the worst was gone before pulling him to his chest allowing him to rest on it.

-Do you have an idea of how gay is this, right?- he managed to say, feeling all Matt's tension through his muscles, and suddenly needy to hear his laugh, just one more time before his leaving.

-You are the only one who can actually see us so... I don't give a shit-

-Not if I take a picture and post it on Facebook- Finally he got what he wanted: Matt was grinning, finally. But it was a short victory.

-Foggy-

-What?-

Matt was a great lawyer, he always knew what to say and how to, but this was one of those times he couldn't, and that almost made Foggy to break into tears.

-Thank you- he eventually managed to say.

There was so much left unspoken in that line, but real friends don't need words.

-You are welcome, Matty- _You are worth it, Matty, I'll die for you, Matty_ , he was thinking, but pointing that out would probably lead to a fight or something very similar he didn't want to face in that moment.

They stayed together, chatting about nothing, until Stick decided their time was up.

* * *

Foggy didn't remember exactly how he got from the house where he was kept to Matt's apartment, probably because his brain was still trying to be enlightened by an idea (any idea, actually, no matter how stupid or dangerous it could be, just a single idea idea) that would possibly convince Stick to take him with them, or maybe because the ninjas hadn't paid much attention to his wounds and he had passed out.

He remembered he had found himself being hugged by a koala version of Karen, and he could do anything but return the favour, forgetting for a while she was making it hard for him to breathe.

And then Karen was kissing him and oxygen was no longer so vital. He stood still just for a second before returning the kiss.

-Sorry- Karen murmured when they finally separated, and he was suddenly sure she wasn't the only one who had flushed.-Are you ok?-

-Yeah... More than good- she hit him on his shoulder -Oh..You mean... For the deal... Sure...- but the slowness and prudence of his movements gave him away.

-As soon as Claire comes back I'll ask her to check on you-

-Where is she?- he urged, suddenly worried for her. He didn't know exactly what was going on with the two of them, but he supposed Matt wasn't the only one in love.

-She went to the roof I think... She was more than pissed off when she discovered Matt has slid out off. Are they a thing?-

-Yes. No. Probably. We are talking about Matt Murdock, there's never a simple description for his love life... For his whole life, actually.-

-Yeah, I figured that... - Karen helped him to the couch, where he leaned on his side to not put his back in direct contact with the leather. He was thirsty, but he didn't want to bother Karen, so he forced himself to lay still for a while, allowing his body to melt into the soft cushions.

He felt guilty. He was here, in Matt's open space, safe, and the girl he had loved for some time had just kissed him while his best friend had been forced to leave everything he cared about behind to save all of them. He passed a hand on his own face, covering his tired eyes. It wasn't fair.

Not just this time. Matt had lost his mother, then his sight (ok, he had earned superpowers from that but, still, fuck) and his dad. And now this.

Foggy knew Catholics didn't believe in reincarnation, but he couldn't avoid to think what kind of bad person Matt might have been in a former life to deserve all that pain in this one.

-Are you ok?-

-Yes, Karen... I was just... Thinking-

-You look exhausted-

-I haven't slept much these days... Whenever I closed my eyes, I rewatched Stick throwing Matt out of that window... And keep beating the shit out of him... And Matt... He wasn't even moving... He was helpless... - he shivered at the memories, remembering how he wished to be blind so he wouldn't be forced to see such a scene. He let Karen pull him on her chest, her hand gently rubbing his back. -I'm scared, Kar... I've tried to think about something, anything to convince Stick to take me with them. I can't stand to think about Matt like that again, alone in an alley or a dumpster- he hid his face on the socket between her neck and shoulder, fighting (and failing) to choke back tears .

Karen kissed his hair but she said nothing to comfort him. She knew too well him and had seen the ninjas' way of making sure the job was done, and she was probably as scared as him.

* * *

Claire came back about an hour later, and Foggy discovered Karen had been honest when she said she was more than pissed off. She was so bloody furious at Matt that it wasn't easy being her patient. Even if she had tried to be professional, her hands were shaking so much Karen had to stop her a couple of times when Foggy couldn't help but groan out loud.

-I'm sorry, Foggy- she apologized -If you can bear the pain, I'll take some time to calm down-

He nodded, and she took the opportunity to take a shower.

-Claire?- he inquired when Karen had left to buy some food at thai for dinner, about half an hour later -What happened?-

-He left- she answered. too fast and too simple. Foggy didn't buy it. He knew she knew that, but he didn't push for a more detailed explanation. She wasn't Matt and despite everything he barely knew her and he didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable.

-He did the same to me a month ago- Foggy replied, nodding slightly sympathetically at her. -I know the feeling, but I know he didn't want to hurt you-

-Then why...-

-I think he is just a coward, deep down- he saw her frown, so he made himself more clear -when we were at college, the first year...and the second one too, actually, when holiday such as Christmas, or thanksgiving, you know, those kind of festivities you usually spent with your family, were near, you know, when the streets were decked out and so on, he'd get very quiet, withdrawn, his head so focused on his books I had almost to remind him he had to eat and shower and the last day, he simply disappeared before I came back from class.-

-Disappeared?-

-Yup. Every single holiday's eve, and it drove me crazy, because what sort of fucking friend ups and leaves you without a word? And after we came back, when I asked, he muttered something about an emergency. For someone who's basically a human polygraph, he sucks at telling lies.-

-What's the point, Foggy?- Claire argued, and he took it as a sign to not push her temper for too long.

-I'm getting it. By the way. The second christmas, I followed him. He had checked himself into a cheap motel room, all alone-

-What did you do?- her curiosity was now higher than her rage, probably, and Foggy couldn't help but being glad about it. She had begun to check him over again, but his story was helping her to focus on something else but Matt. He grinned, feeling only partially guilty for what he was going about to say.

-Well... I might have called the owner of the Motel and told him the guy in the room 55 was going to have sex with other men...-

-You what?!- Claire was looking at him as if she hadn't decided yet if she had to laugh or curse at him. Eventually, she came out with a mesh up.

-I wanted Matt out of that place. It worked, and Matt had to call me to pick him up. I discovered he had done the same every time, just because he didn't want hear me saying goodbye. He just can't handle those kind of things, I think it's because of what happened to his father. He went out for a fight, and he had found him dead in an alley, he had been shot. And then there was Elektra, too-

-Who?-

-A Greek girl back in college... She was the Greek Ambassador's daughter, and I think that was the first time I've seen Matt truly in love with someone.-

-What happened?-

-They went out for dinner and the day after she was gone-

-Did she die?-

-I don't think so. She just...disappeared-

Claire nodded and let Foggy hug her. He can feel the most part of her anger had gone by now; her touch on his skin was soft and he could barely perceive her fingers. Foggy recognized there was a chink in Matt's method of acting, because he was feeling the same sort of pain with Claire that he had experienced with Elektra (and Foggy knew Matt had been hurt way more he had let people see), but he really couldn't blame him for that. He had suffered so much so far that he could fully forgive him for being selfish this time.

-I'm done, Foggy- she said suddenly, and helped him to lay down on the couch. His ribs gave him a rush of pain he had to bit his lips to not scream- but may I suggest you to go to the hospital? You can say it was a robbery or something like that... I can treat your external wounds, but I'd like to be sure about a concussion or broken ribs-

He nodded. She was right, totally right, but right now he just wanted to pass out, sleep and then wake up just to discover everything had been a nightmare.

 ** _000_**

Foggy was at the hospital. She and Karen had decided to take him there when he had basically collapsed on the couch. Claire's hypothesis was the the adrenaline had kept him working until she had checked him over and then he had just let himself collapse into vomiting and, after that, unconsciousness.

The girls were sitting in the waiting room of metro general hospital while Foggy was subject to a full check up. Claire was a close friend of the doctor in charge that night, and she didn't take long to convince him it was unnecessary to call Foggy's sister (that was his first Emergency Contact) despite the evidence of assault.

Hours had passed since the moment they came here when they were finally allowed to see him.

He was half asleep on the bed, his injuries had been treated properly, and they were waiting for X-ray, TC and ultrasound scan, NMR results.

Foggy was awake, laid on the bed with a sad look on his face. Claire was a bit hurt by that. She had seen him furious and desperate when he had found Matt that night, but he had never been so mesto in front of her.

-I'm sorry- he apologized to both of them when they entered the small room. There were two beds in it, but the second one was empty, so the whole room was actually available for Foggy.

He had chosen to stay in the bed near the window, from where he could see the skyline of Hell's Kitchen; the purpose of that decision was so clear her heart was truly touched by that: he hoped to see his best friend's silhouette running and jumping through the rooftops of the neighbourhood.

-You don't have to apologize- she answered hiding a smile. She had lost the count of the times he had heard Matt tell her those words, followed by a thank you, after he had taken a beating. After the incident, he had told her maybe they had lost their meaning, but she had always perceived how he had put his soul and his heart in them every single time she had never thought they weren't real. -It's ok. You are going to be ok-

-Have you already seen the medical reports?-

-No, but you haven't puked any more and you seem quite in a good shape, so I feel like I can be optimistic-

He nodded again and Karen took his hand, making him smile like a teenager at the first rush.

-I have to go- Claire declared, mostly because she wanted to leave them some privacy -I have to report I'm coming back to work and find a new apartment-

-Wait, Claire?- Karen stopped her -Why don't you stay by Matt's? The rent has been already paid until December so...-

Claire looked at Foggy as a reflex. She knew perfectly well he wasn't Matt, but he was the closest thing she had in that moment. The nurse knew very well how reserved the blind man was, although he didn't have a second thought to open his door after the Russian had kidnapped her, and she didn't want to intrude upon his life like this, even if he wasn't there right now.

Again, even with a more-than-probable concussion, the man was able to read all that was in her mind as if it had been written in a book.

-I think he would be ok with that.- he smiled gently and moved his hand to slightly caress his cheek -you are the only one he really listens to, even in Daredevil or panic or stubborn-son-of-a-bitch mode, and trust me when I say it's the first time I've see something like that happen. So, please. Stay-

Claire had always thought to be a strong person, one that could bear almost everything and not so keen on whimpering, but once again Foggy was showing off another of his hidden qualities and she found her eyes suddenly full of tears he struggled to stifle. She realized in that moment she was really afraid this would be the last act of Matt's life, that there wouldn't' be a second chance to find him weeping in a church. That he'd die without her ever seeing him again.

-Claire, hey... - Foggy patted her cheek, wiping away her cry -It's Matty. He will be fine, eventually. Just give him time to kick Stick's ass-

She nodded and tried out a soft smile before leaving.

* * *

Three days later, when she came home after one of her most terrible shifts of her nurse life, she found a rose leaned on the doormat of Matt's apartment, accompanied by a small card.

She had decided to accept Karen's invitation and had moved in it, but she hadn't unpacked her things yet. She still hoped Matt would come back and, beside that, she didn't want to fill the loft with her things and scents, he wouldn't appreciate that. So she was sleeping on the couch, with a black mask on her eyes to shut down that bright as fuck billboard (and the light of the morning when she came back from a night shift). She used just one or two shelves in the kitchen and put only almost unscented foods in the fridge.

She was also showering at the hospital, but overall she was trying not to enter in his bedroom, as if it was some kind of sanctuary she didn't want to violate with her presence. When he would return, she wanted him to have his own uncontaminated place.

She sighed in exasperation.

The doctor who had welcomed Foggy had apparently misunderstood her kindness for interest and had begun to ask her for a breakfast after the shift, a lunch break and so on. She had refused until now, but he hadn't given up yet.

She picked up the flower anyway. It was beautiful, red and strong scented (but still not so much to result pesky to her nose) and its petals were soft and smooth under her fingers.

She was tempted to not open the card, but then her curiosity overcame her peeve and she couldn't avoid giving in and reading it.

Claire's heart skipped a beat or two (ok, maybe three) when she saw the only word written on it.

Well, maybe scratched was a more suitable word for the occasion. The handwriting was shaky and unsure, like if it had been written by a child or by someone unused to writing. The point of the pen had been pressed so hard that in some points the paper had broken for the pressure.

 _Welcome._

She couldn't help but smile.

Claire put the rose in the living room, near to the window, but not so close in case some horned vigilante decided to come home, then she started to unpack.

But still, she kept sleeping on the couch.

 _ **000**_

Stick looked at Matt, still fast asleep on the couch of the small hotel bedroom they had rented for that day. The boy had a hand on his side, and Stick could smell the blood coming out from the wound.

He sighed and shook him more gently than usual. Matt started, ready to defend himself.

-Calm down, kid. I just need to stitch you up before you bleed out in this room-

He felt him lift his black sweatshirt, revealing the cut. Stick used his fingers to feel exactly how deep and extended it was. -Still, kid. I don't want to hurt you-

-Now you suddenly care?-

His index finger might or might not have slipped into the wound, making the lawyer groan with pain.

Stick took care of it and then left him in the room. He still had to kill a Black Sky before it could be used as a weapon. It was a little girl, this time, and he had said nothing to Matt about it.

Things were different with him since they had left New York.

Matt was angry at him, but more submissive, and it was easier to handle. The punishment had worked, and now all Stick had to do to compel him to stay quiet was take his phone and treat his friends. At the same time, he was trying to not push him to the limit again. Stick was not an idiot, and he had realized how fucked up he was as soon as he and that Foggy had come back, and that was the real reason he had left him a week to recover.

He had stopped the punishments (well, most of them, actually) and kept him in the dark for the most of his missions.

A month had passed and everything seemed to work. They were almost done, at least for now.

* * *

Thanks for reading!


	15. We are done

**A/N** HI! Sorry for the delay, but I had to study 800 pages in 4 days for a test and you can imagine what my life had looked like in the last weekend. Good thing: I passed the test and now I have only one test left before my degree...

By the way, thank you for reading so far e for reviewing, and I can't forget my wonderful beta InsertImaginativeNameHere.

Enjoy the chapter and remember… I don't bite who reviews… but I might buy who doesn't :)

* * *

 _ **Chapter 15: We are done.**_

* * *

When Matt opened his eyes it took him a while to realize that something was wrong, the time for his brain to turn on and order his arm to reach for his phone to tell him what time it was. When the robotic female voice informed him it was 4.30 in the afternoon he almost jumped.

Stick was no longer punishing him as hard as in the past (which meant, basically, he had not thrown him out of a window in a while), but sleeping so much would cause him to lose his temper. A shiver ran down his spine.

He raised and compelled his tired feet to take him into the shower.

His hand reached for the shower gel, and there he found a piece of paper.

Stick and his damn orders. Again.

He removed the note with a single move and passed his fingers on it to read it, and he didn't know whether to be furious or euphoric.

He ran the water and decided to think about it later.

 _ **000**_

Life had settled into a new routine, eventually. Foggy had to stay in the hospital for a week to recover, then he had could try to move on with his life.

It wasn't easy, even if Karen was now in his life not only as a secretary, because Matt's absence was an empty space that was difficult to forget. His thoughts were always for his friend, wondering if he was doing as well as he said in the last email.

Because, this time, Matt hadn't completely disappeared from their life. Claire had told him about the rose and the card she had found out of his (her) apartment and some days he had received short messages in their firm email address. They were just few words, sent by a fake ID, but for him they were more than enough.

 _ **000**_

-I'll take a break- Claire declared after the tenth? Fifteenth? (She had lost count after an hour) drunk and drugged-up boy of the night.

This last one was barely coming of age, and he clearly had absolutely no idea on how to pick up a girl. Someone really should explain to him that a nurse who had just treated you for injuries caused during your own stupid idea of fun was definitely off-limits… and that in any case, you should never fondle an ass without permission.

She sighed and took a mug of that terrible coffee they had in the nurses' room. She hated that, but it was still better than the snack machine's abysmal attempt.

She needed some fresh air, and the small balcony outside the waiting room was now empty, so she choose that one as a shelter. She sat on it, her knees folded against her chest and, as a reflex, she looked and the skyline, looking for a red shape.

It was a mere delusion, she was sure if Matt did come back for any reason he would find a way to see her, or Foggy, somehow, but a part inside of her still hoped he might not do that, and hoped to find herself furious at him after spotting him running on a rooftop.

-I envy that boy right now- a voice beside her made her jump. It was deep and… it was coming from a direction where no one should be. No one with sense, at least.

 _ **000**_

After the shower, Matt had re-read (re-touched) the note… and he found himself on the edge of so many feelings his body menaced him to explode if he couldn't make his mind up.

" _We are done. Go home, kid"_

Stick had left him only a short message and just disappeared as he did when he was nine. He had scanned the room with his radar-like sense, and found out all the man's stuff had already gone along with him. ( _It's Stick. He's a dick, what else did you expect?_ His Foggy-bear voiced brain had told him, and he had to admit it wasn't completely wrong).

No explanation, no thank you, no apologies. Nothing except the already paid bill of the room.

At nine, he had been sad and disappointed by that, and the pain and the guilt he had suffered were nothing so different from his father's death, but at the time he was a lonely kid on the edge of madness, and the blind old man had been the first one who really helped him.

Now, he had Foggy waiting for him in NY and something very much akin to a start of a relationship with an amazing woman, even if he didn't want to rely too much on that. Claire was not the kind of princess who would await her prince (devil?) forever, and he had been away for more than a month. Nevertheless, he wasn't alone. Not anymore.

Then why was he so angry right now?

He should be happy, and already on a train back to his city, not standing in this chamber, with that piece of paper trapped in his fist, unable to do anything but feel the rage rising inside of him.

 _Hey, Little Horn. You are free. Move your ass back to Hell's Kitchen._

Yeah. Foggy was right. Screw Stick and his freaking war.

Finally, he managed to move. He didn't have much with him, so it didn't take him long to pack everything and leave.

When he asked for the train station, the amused and ironic laugh coming from the receptionist made him realize they were in some kind of small village somewhere in New Jersey. By the way, the man instructed him to the bus station. From there, he could reach Jersey City and there finally take a train or something to New York.

Awsome. Stick had left him in the middle of nowhere.

He considered the idea of calling Foggy to let him know he was coming back, but when he discovered it would take him several hours to get home, he decided to not make him worry for his sake, and not knowing how to answer the question "where are you" was something that could really make his friend freak out.

He finally arrived at the Grand Central Station just in time to have a quick dinner before wearing the Mask and jumping to the Metro General Hospital. He didn't know if she was on shift or if it was her day off, but it was worth a check, plus, the ER was nearer than his own home.

He crouched on the roof, covered by the darkness of the night, and slightly tilted his head to focus solely on his hearing. He tried to shut down the smells of the hospital a mixture of latex, antiseptics, medicines, blood, sweat, death and, overall, fear. They took him twenty years back, when he had opened his eyes only to discover they would never be able to see anything but darkness, and right now, for the first time, he really wanted to be here, because she was on the inside of that structure, his personal Hell, and to stay with her, Hell was a place as good as Heaven.

He scanned the whole ER. Fast, slow and normal heartbeats rate, tears of joy of a girl who had seen her baby for the first time, tears of desperation from a mother who had just lost her son in a car accident. A doctor had just said to a young man he was going to die for a cancer, his fear hit him loud and clear. He shook his head to throw everything out, to stop himself from being overwhelmed and kept searching for… there. Steps. They were sure, but the right foot always hit the ground with a little bit more strength than the left. And there, here it was. Her heartbeat. He could stay hours listening to it, wrapping himself in its sound as in a blanket. Matt stayed there, listening to her voice, soft and sweet while she was reassuring a kid with a broken arm, annoyed and angry with some kids off their heads on liquor; he grinned when he heard the last one slapping his hand on her bottom and she had barely stopped herself from returning the gesture on his face.

When she finally took a break, he followed her steps to that balcony. He couldn't wait a second longer.

There was a cornice just behind her. It wasn't big, but it was perfect for him.

-I envy that boy right now- he whispered just behind her ear.

He smiled when she jumped and stood. He took the chance to reach a safer position on the railing.

 _ **000**_

And suddenly, the Man in The Mask was in front of her, standing on the railing as confident of his balance as any normal person would be on a sidewalk. Claire backed a step and let him jump on the balcony, where she would not risk having a heart-attack.

As soon as his feet touched the ground, she couldn't restrain herself anymore and gave him the slap she hadn't thrown some minutes before; all the anger for his disappearance and the fear for his safety concentrated into her hand and exploded against his face.

-Matthew Murdock, don't you dare disappear like that again- but then she couldn't stay angry at him any longer and held him in her arms.

She could feel his whole body relaxing under her touch, and for a second she feared he would collapse again, but he held on, allowing himself to rest his head on her shoulder.

-Are you ok?- she whispered tightening her clasp on him, her nurse side overcoming the girl who had just met her almost-boyfriend after a month. She was relieved when he shook his head against the furniture of her workwear.

-Just..tired-

-Where's Stick?-

-Gone-

Gone? Was he dead? Obviously Matt wasn't in a talking mood so she didn't ask and enjoyed the sensation of his embrace, the warm of his body against hers.

-Are you staying?-

-Yes- it was the best he could manage. She hugged him even tighter than she already was. Her pager ruined everything. She turned it off, releasing him. -Work?- he asked.

She nodded and smiled.

-You should go and see Foggy. He is still in your office, he's working on a case-

 _ **000**_

And suddenly the man without fear was experiencing the exact emotion. The last time he had seen his best friend, Foggy had been just beaten in order to save him, and now, Matt was in two minds. On one hand, he really wanted to see him as soon as possible, on the other he was afraid of what he could find. Had Foggy fully recovered yet? Did he hate him? Would Foggy still be on his side?

-He's waiting for you- Claire insisted with her soft sweet voice, as if she was reading in his mind - He works late every night, hoping for you to get at the office. Go-

Finally, Matt nodded.

-Good night, Claire-

-See you at home. Get some rest-

A few rooftops later he was above his (maybe) former office. From there he could already smell the scent of Karen's awful coffee in the air and, along with that Foggy's unique heartbeat. He felt stupid, but he suddenly started to cry. His friend's presence moved him way more than Claire's. He loved her, of course, but Foggy, his office, everything in that building was screaming the word "home" in his heart, and it was just too overwhelming to hang on a second more.

He was home.

Matt let everything flow over his skin and inside him, breathing and absorbing every single sensation he could hear, feel and touch. It took him a while to recover himself and let his body climb down until the window of Foggy's office, the one that was open.

He landed without a single sound on the ledge and just crouched on it. His partner was sit at his desk, with his back to the window. Matt just waited for him to turn and...being Foggy.

It was maybe a bit cruel of him, but only God knew how much he needed something like that.

Matt almost laughed when Foggy stood up and made his way to the bathroom, walking less than 3 feet from him without noticing the black figure watching him, but somehow he managed to stay perfectly still. Foggy did basically the same when he came back, and it took him a whole minute to stop in his tracks and slowly turn toward the window with a start.

-I'm going to kill you, Murdock!- he greeted him, and they almost fell down for the force Foggy used to grab his arms and pulling him inside, hugging him with the same move. And Matt, the I-am-not-a-big-fan-of-hugs Matt, hugged him back with all his strength, while Foggy threw his mask away so resolutely it almost hurt, but Matt didn't care, he was almost relieved by the gesture. He was starting to hate the black outfit, filled with too many bad actions he had to undertake following Stick in his war. -Are you staying?- Foggy finally whispered and Matt couldn't help to notice Claire had asked him exactly the same words. He feel a knot in his throat and all he could do was nodding. Foggy bursted into tears, leaning on him, and Matt supported him as long as he needed. It was Foggy. He was home, safety, friendship and family.

 _Thanks, Stick._

Eventually, the blond lawyers managed to pull himself back together and released the blind man from his desperate and strong grasp.

-You look exhausted- he murmured looking him in the eyes, and Matt nodded. As he had told Claire, he really was. -Go home, buddy. Have some rest-

-Are you going too?-

-I wish, but I have a case I have to work to-

-May… may I stay? Maybe help?- Matt asked, almost shyly, like if he wasn't sure he belonged to Nelson & Murdock anymore, because he really wasn't. He had been away for almost three months, leaving Foggy alone to take care of everything. He hadn't paid his part of rent too, so he wouldn't be surprise if he didn't want him anymore.

-I have nothing in braille- His best friend replied, almost apologizing for not having printed those files for him. -But if you wanna stay… your office is waiting for you-

Matt allowed himself to relax at those words, but he didn't feel like he wanted to stay alone. He had been away for so long he physically needed Foggy's chat, his heartbeat and his involuntary twitches that had driven him mad in college.

-I don't really need braille, actually… so… why don't we move in the conference room? We can work together- and guessing the curious look in Foggy's eyes, he explained how he could easily read printed pages feeling the difference between ink and paper. He received a pen thrown by his best friend aimed directly on his forehead.

-You son of a bitch! You made me read all that crap for you during college and you could have done it by yourself! I hate you!-

Matt laughed and didn't bother to catch or avoid the small object.

-Thanks to those nights you graduated cum laude! I was helping you!-

-Shut up, little horn!- _speaking of..._

-Little horn? Seriously?- he asked.

-You have to admit that, man. Those horns on your costume are a bit too much… and little-

-I think they are cute. I miss them. Wait… are you arguing about the horns or the fact they are too small?-

Foggy laughed, then offered him a folder.

-You can start from here, Little Horn-

 _ **000**_

They worked in a relaxed silence for a while. Foggy felt like a new man now that his best friend had come back safe and sound.

He actually had a lot of questions in his mind, starting from what had happened to Stick and his band of ninjas or why he had let Matt go. He had excluded from the beginning the possibility that his partner had just fled from his mentor, not after what they all had experienced a month before. He was damn curious about it, but it seemed Matt wouldn't like to talk about it and Foggy didn't want to ruin the atmosphere around them by forcing him to speak. He would, eventually, because Matt had always spoken to him about everything (well, almost everything, at least). He also wanted to ask if he had already seen Claire, but when he decided to speak, he raised his eyes only to find Matt sleeping with the head leaned on his side of the small desk, his arm folded under it used as pillows.

The scene was so cute Foggy smiled and took a photo with his smartphone and sent it to Claire and Karen before going back to work.

 _ **000**_

Claire met Karen outside the Metro General, after the end of her shift. She was tired, but Matt's return was keeping her well awake. When she had seen the picture Foggy had sent her, she smiled with exasperation. Of course Matt would come back to work immediately without any rest.

-Hey- Karen greeted her and Claire felt a bit ashamed. The blondie was perfect in her light blue dress and her make-up and hair were great, while she was wearing sweatpants that maybe belonged to Matt and a simple t-shirt, but soon she decided she didn't care. The shift was terrible and she was exhausted -You look like shit-

-Thanks- the nurse smiled repressing a yawn and taking the coffee Karen was offering her

-Did Foggy send the picture to you too?-

-Matt's one?- Karen nodded.

-I can't believe he's back, finally- and Claire couldn't restrain the big smile growing on her own face. After his visit that night, everything had seemed easier to her, and she had given everything to go home (or in the office) with him, just to stay there and look at him.

 _When did you become that kind of girl, exactly?_ Her pride asked her, but she ignored it to answer.

-Yeah. Me too. I missed him-

-I want to kick his ass. A lot- the resolution in her friend's voice made her laugh and worry at the same time. They both had been disappointed when Foggy had walked through the door that day and they had discovered he had left without a word.

-I've already done it. Last night- the nurse replied while they made their way to the Nelson & Murdock office.

Karen opened the door with her key and they found the two lawyers fast asleep on the desk of their conference room, papers and documents spread almost everywhere between the table and the floor. Foggy's tie was on the ground too and the first buttons of his shirt were untied, while Matt somehow looked like a middle ground between the man in the mask and a lawyer. The result was that they both were so sweet that they smiled and Karen took a photo.

-What were you saying about kicking his ass?- Claire asked with a smile when she saw Karen's reaction to the cuteness of the situation.

-This goes directly in my office- she declared before waking up the two guys.

-I want a copy- Claire decided to follow suit shaking gently Matt's shoulder, hoping he wouldn't attack her. She felt how he tensed at her touch, but she whispered a soft good morning and he immediately relaxed, greeting her with one of his sweet smiles.

An hour later, they finally reached his (their?) home and she saw the surprise in his eyes when he discovered she hadn't touched his bedroom.

-Have you slept on the couch all the time?-

-I didn't want to leave my scent everywhere. I wanted you to have your own space-

He held her closer to him.

-I love your scent- then she saw him turn his head toward the library where she had put the rose and the card he had used to welcome her, raising his nose as if he was sniffing. That made her smile -You've kept it-

-What did you expect?- she answered kissing him softly on his cheek -It was the sweetest welcome I've ever had. Thank you, by the way-

From that morning, she didn't sleep on that couch anymore.

* * *

Thanks for reading so far!

Stay tuned, more chapters are coming!


	16. We are your family

_**A/N**_ : Thanks to everyone for reading, reviewing and following so far!

A little warning: since both and my terrific beta have a life next updates could be not as regular as so far. I'm sorry but I promise I'm not dropping this story!

And remember: I don't bite those who reviews but I might who doesn't :D

* * *

 _ **Chapter 16: We Are Your Family**_

* * *

Good thing about Matt being back in Hell's Kitchen? Foggy would never live in agony anymore (not so much, at least).

Bad thing about Matt being back in Hell's Kitchen after Stick left him a card without any explanations? He had become the most annoying person in the office.

And by annoying he didn't mean in the good way.

And by the office Foggy meant in the whole city.

The first days, he had tried to be sympathetic. Matt was tired and angry, and he could understand it. Actually, he was disappointed as well as his blind friend. Stick had put all of them through Hell to have Matt back, he had tortured and punished them without showing any mercy; fuck, he had almost killed his own pupil, and now all he gave them, all he had given to Matt was nothing?

Karen (and Claire, actually) had tried to convince him he had to be glad his best friend, his brother, had come back and that the longer Stick stayed out of their lives the better, and when he didn't recall the events of the last month he agreed with them, but still, Matt deserved better, and Foggy wasn't completely sure he didn't feel guilty about it, because he was a damn good Catholic boy and he was damn good at finding his own faults where they didn't exist at all.

The results of all his guilt/anger/ disappointment/insert-more-self-destructive-feelings-Matt-could-possibly-feel-and-you-can't-even-imagine-because-they-probably-don't-even-exist-yet's-name-here was that Matt was becoming insufferable to him (and Karen, actually. Claire was out of the equation. The girl seemed to be some kind of witch or superhero with the power to bring back the usual Matt when she was around. That, or she really could scare their friend so much he was compelled to obey her, Foggy hadn't decided which yet). It was like having an angry Daredevil on duty instead of the quiet lawyer in their firm, and it wasn't good for their nerves (including Matt's, of course).

That anger or whatever it was, went on for a whole week, until Karen decided to kidnap Claire on her night off and take the nurse with her to the movie theatre to watch one of those flicks full of love, tragedy and young girls crying she loved so much and Foggy firmly refused to see, because there was a limit even in a relationship.

They were handling a difficult case. A not-so-young-couple was fighting to have their kid back after they were found guilty of drug abuse and, most important, beating the kid to the point he had to be hospitalized for a while. Foggy didn't even know why Matt had decided to take this case. The pair were now out of prison but they weren't yet declared cleared for drugs, and they obviously weren't the best thing for that kid who had been, for the record, taken in custody by a couple which had already declared his wish to adopt him if (when, because Foggy thought it definitely was a when ) the judge would decide the biological parents would put the young boy in danger. On normal days, Foggy would have no doubt Matt would have rejected it, still, now he was fully convinced the best thing for him would be to live with his biological family, and he had been so stubborn if he hadn't been Matt, or better, if he had been the usual Matt, Foggy would have choose to represent the adoptive family just to drive some sense in him.

-Matt...- he repeated for the who-the-hell-keep-the-counts-anymore-th time in two days -I'm ready to bet my law practicing license that kid is not gonna reach his 13th if we help those guys...-

-They are his parents, and they love him-

-Matt, they are drug addicts!- oh, what the hell. This is wasn't Matt, this was some kind of soulless lawyer who only cared about the money (because the guys were rich, despite everything) and he couldn't bear it any longer. -What the hell is going on with you? He has found a family who loves him, truly, and wants to adopt him! We should help them, pro bono!-

-They think they love him! But someday they'd have their own kid, or he will fail them, and they will simply put him back in an orphanage, if he is lucky enough-

And now Foggy finally understood the problem. It was Stick. Suddenly all his aggressiveness vanished and he really wanted to kick his own ass for not having figured that there was something wrong with his partner sooner. He sighed, thinking what the best way to say what he was going to was. Probably it was going to end badly, but the blond lawyer couldn't afford to condemn a kid to misery to follow Matt this time.

-Matt.- he started, trying to sound calm and not too sickly sweet. -I know Stick left you when you were a kid, and I know you think is your fault and…- he had just taken the point, if not the match. Matt ducked his head, avoiding his eyes. Foggy risked a step forward his friend. -Matt… it wasn't your fault that time, and it wasn't your fault last week. He is a dick-

The blind guy nodded, but Foggy knew him well enough to be fooled by his half smile, so he went on -We are your family, Matt. Me, Claire, even Karen. We all risked our lives for you, buddy-

And that was the wrongest thing to say to the guy with the bad habit of putting everything on his own shoulders. Luckily for them, his brain could think even when Foggy went offline, and he found his mouth keep talking -Don't do that. Don't put that on you, Murdock. It was our choice. It was _my_ choice to make that deal, and I would do it again without a second thoughts, ok?-

-And for what?- suddenly Matt's voice was bitter and full with anger and barely restrained tears -After a month he left me, in the middle of nowhere, without a single word. He just… he's just used me. He hurt me… and you… and… now what?-

That wasn't an easy question to answer. You couldn't just tell someone to move on after what they had been through, especially if that someone was Matthew.

-We'll figure out something, Matty. We are a family, and we can't let Stick tear us apart, not like this. Maybe this is just another attempt to make you think it's no use having a family, that family always leaves you sooner or later, I don't know and, honestly, I don't even care.- he would have added that if Stick wanted to split the two of them he would have to kill him but, again, his brain overcame instinct and saved the day.

Now Matt was looking at him, still silent with his eyes hidden behind the dark glasses (Foggy really hated when Matt wore them when they were alone), the rest of his body not really tensed but not quite relaxed either. Foggy almost panicked because his best friend was quiet, and not the good kind of quietness -Matt, speak to me, please. Say something-

-Claire's already left me, once- he murmured, after a long moment in which the only noise in the room was the low hum of the traffic on the street.

-But now she's here, with you. Besides, she'd never abandon you. She was there in less than five minutes when I called her that night. She barely changed from her pajamas. By the way. I left you too, remember?- Foggy felt like he had to risk playing that card -And I felt like shit the minute I crossed your door to leave. Sometimes you piss people off, Matty, and I swear, you are fucking good at that, call it one of your superpowers- he was rewarded by a grin, but he couldn't really tell if it was forced or not -but trust me, no one who loves you could ever truly abandon you. Listen to my heart now, Murdock-

-Fog…-

-Shut up and listen to me- he paused -are you listening?- A small nod. -I am not going to leave you, Matthew Michael Murdock. Never. Am I lying?-

And suddenly the Man Without Fear was crying against his shoulder, leaning onto it with so much trust Foggy almost fell down for the extra weight he found on himself. He recovered quickly, though, and his arms and chest were ready.

It didn't last more than a couple of minutes, and when Matt raised his head, finally pulling off those damn glasses, allowing him to see his eyes for the first time since the night he came back, he recognized his best friend, finally.

-So?- Matt asked, grinning -Pro bono?-

-Well... Could we try to ask for payment? At least?-

-That's my Foggy Bear-

How did he...? Super hearing. Of course.

-How long have you known that? No, don't tell me. I don't wanna know. Just stop calling me that-

-One condition-

-Spit it out-

-You'll drop Little Horn-

-No way-

-Then we don't have a deal, counselor-

-I hate you, Little Horn-

-Me too... Foggy Bear-

 _ **000**_

Foggy was right, Matt thought while he and the blond were going home that night. He had been a completely asshole, and that affected not only his relationship with Foggy and Karen, but also his day job, and all because Stick had left him and for some kind of freaking instinct he was even feeling guilty about that.

-Do you have a plan for tonight?-

-I was thinking... I might go out on patrol tonight. Claire is out with Karen tonight so...-

Foggy smiled, although Matt had clearly heard his heartbeat increase at the thought of him being Daredevil again. Still, all he did was give him a pat on his shoulder.

-Be careful, and call me as soon as you get home, ok?-

-Deal-

-And… Matt?-

-Yes?-

-Don't screw everything up with Claire-

Matt didn't answer that. He knew too well his past with relationships had been not so good since he was in college, but this time was different. Claire was the first to know his secret abilities, except for Elektra, and she was nice, really nice, and strong. And Foggy approved, which was the real news in all of this. And so far, he had been right in an almost creepy way. Eventually, he nodded, greeting his best friend before going home and changing his clothes for the red armor.

 _ **000**_

Claire was happy.

Well, maybe happy wasn't the most right word to describe how she felt since Matt's return, but it was probably close enough, because that was the thing every one of her friends and colleagues had said to her since two months.

The first period had been tough. Matt had felt guilty all the time and Claire didn't know who to thank for that, if God, Stick, Matt's Dad or whoever and for the first times he had something really close to a panic attack every time they had any kind of argument and had almost driven Foggy mad for something she really had refused to understand, because the two were some kind of unique entity Claire decided to accept without asking too many questions about it.

She had figured what the panic was due to in about a week (after he had tried to hide the reasons from her, of course, until the day she had found him trembling from the top of his head to his feet in the bathroom), when they had a fight just after dinner, right before her leaving for her shift at Metro general. That day she was going to take a rucksack instead of her usual bag before she had planned to collect some of her clothes from a friend where she had left them before leaving for Boston, but probably he had thought she was leaving him and he had simply overreacted. It took her a while (and a lot of mental curses to Stick) to calm him down and convince him she wasn't, and from that day she had been extremely careful about her words and actions.

It took him a while to move on, to let go of his fear of abandonment, but soon he began to go out during the nights, stopping sometimes to meet her when she could take a break, and she couldn't help but be happy about that, because it was helping to recover his usual self confidence; plus, the new outfit was doing his job protecting him from serious cuts and other injuries, even when she had to put stitches on him her mind didn't miss the chance to remind her it could have been a deadly shot with the old crappy black suits.

* * *

That night, she was on shift, and she was glad to see Matt had stayed at home or hadn't had serious fights until now (she could tell that by the lack of bloodied people arriving with the police). The ER was crowded, but nothing more than minor injuries so she decided to take her time to send a text to Matt and go and wait for him on her usual spot on the balcony outside the waiting room, where he had joined her the night he had come back.

She jumped when Marie, one of her colleagues, rushed into the room looking for her, and followed her at the triage.

The scene she saw froze her right where she was.

 _This is a nightmare. This can't be true._

-Daredevil…- she murmured, barely restraining herself from running toward him crying his real name.

* * *

Thanks for reading!

Uhm… Zoe Perja, what were you saying about Cliffhanger? :D


	17. Penguins don't fly

**A/N** : Here I am again, and I am pleased and sorry at the same time because we are near to the end of this story. The next chapter (the 18th) will be the last one. I am thinking about a sequel because I have some ideas in my mind, but I am also writing something new, a couple of one shots I hope to share with you as soon as possible!

Again thank to all of you who are reading this story so far, and Thanks to my beta, you are amazing!

So… no more words. Here it is the new chapter!

* * *

 _ **Chapter 17: Penguins don't fly**_

* * *

-Claire!- John's voice was unusually loud and harsh, and she realized she might have blacked out for a while and that it wasn't the first time he was calling for her help. She shook her head to clear her mind and throw the panic away.

Daredevil was standing near the check-in desk in his distinctive red suit and horns, heavily painting, and he was holding someone in his arms. He was an old man and from the limpness of his body, he seemed unconscious. She took a second to conduct a swift check on Matt ( _Daredevil, Claire. He is just Daredevil and you are just a nurse_ ). He seemed to be ok at first glance but the red suit made difficult to spot blood under those lights.

-Help him- The man in the suit asked in a low voice, without any sign of threat or danger, he even seemed calm and she had to admit he was quite a good actor, but she could read him even under his mask. Claire knew that tone... and suddenly she also knew the man's identity.

John was the doctor in charge that night and luckily for them, he was one of those that saved a life first and then asked questions about insurance and other stuff later.

-Marie, find a gurney. Claire, help me here.- he was trying to check over Stick, but Matt's grasp was so tight on his friend that John was having trouble. He was trying to convince him to let the man go, but concern and dread were making him lose his normally cold blood.

She took a step forward, hoping to not give away that she already knew him and thinking that he really looked threatening in his costume, and that, united with what his victims had said about him in the last months, definitely wasn't helping. Probably, if she hadn't known the real man under the horns she would be as near to a panic as her colleagues, but there was a reason if they called her every time things became difficult, she was one of the most cold-blooded nurses in the Metro-General.

-Sir?- she asked, faltering, trying to use her sweetest tone to break into him -Sir, you have to let him go, please. We've got him, I promise. Just, please, let him go- She was surprised when he didn't listen to her. She tried a new approach, one that could help him without put her in too much trouble. -Sir? Uhm... Mike? Do you remember me? That night, in that dumpster?-

She ignored John's astonished gaze, focusing only on Matt. She had thought about that for about two seconds before deciding it would be the right thing to do. He froze for a moment, then his head moved in one single nod. -Then you know you can trust me, Mike. Please. Leave him now-

Finally, he released his grasp, helping John to put the older man on the stretcher and walking with them into the first-aid station.

She gently pushed him back, forcing his hand to leave the arm of the eldest man.

-Stay here- she whispered -We've got him, ok?- And he simply obeyed.

The doctor looked at her, but she shook her head. Claire knew he was silently asking her to send the Devil out of the room, but that definitely wasn't a good idea.

-Shit- John's word wasn't even close to a real description of Stick's condition. He was wearing what was left of a shirt, largely soaked with blood, dust and maybe rain. John nodded and she cut what she could, exposing his mutilated torso.

The man had been tortured, but the worst things where the three holes Matt had covered with tape to restrain the blood loss. Her heart stopped for a second, and she cursed in her mind because she knew Daredevil could hear that, and what that could mean.

-He needs surgery- she was so intent in drying the blood she had been barely aware that John had approached Daredevil -He's critical, but we'll try everything we can to save him-

she heard him saying, and she recognized his "we need a miracle" tone. -No! You can't come in… please, sir… Claire!-

She immediately left what she was doing to reach the men. John was having a hard time trying to stop the vigilante from entering the Operation Room.

-Mike. Mike!- she was amazed about how fast he changed his attitude at the sound of her voice -Mike. You can't come in, ok? You have to trust the doctor-

-Will… Will you be in with him?- he asked, now apparently calm.

-No, I'm not cleared for OR. I'm going to take care of you instead, ok?-

For a moment, she had feared his reaction, because his whole body had tensed, then his common sense apparently took the lead and he just nodded, moving forward to slightly squeeze one of Stick's hands before let them prepare him for the operation.

Claire looked at the computer that was monitoring the first-aid rooms status, and she found that the very last one, the furthest from the entrance, was free. -I'll take him in room 6- she told Marie.

 _ **000**_

That wasn't happening.

He wasn't in an hospital, and Stick wasn't going to die under surgery. It was a nightmare, and as soon as Claire would use something painful on him he would wake up screaming in his bed and she would hug him.

He was truly convinced about this, and that was the only reason he followed her in the last room of the ER, where she could treat him properly.

That was the only reason he could bear the whole hospital, its smell, fear and...memories of the worst times of his life.

He remained still in the center of the room while she closed all the curtains to hide them from the outside, then her soft arms were around him, holding him close. And he let her, because the sooner she would begin to treat his injuries, the sooner the pain would come and he would find himself awake in his bed.

Claire's superpower seemed to understand when he didn't want to talk, so she began to free him from the suit without speaking a single word, telling him she was there and he was safe only with her touch.

Matt focused his whole mind on the familiar heartbeat of Stick as he had done since the moment he had been shot.

 _Thump thum. Thump thum. Thump thum._

It was still there, but it was slower than before, even if Matt couldn't really tell if it was due to his condition or the anesthesia. It was reassuring, in a certain way, and it distracted him from Claire's hand stitching him up. He expanded his senses a little more to cover what the meds were doing. He could tell they had already extracted two of the three bullets in Stick's chest and they were discussing about the third one that was dangerously near to his heart….

 _Thum-thum-thumthumthumthumthumthumthumthum._

And then there was only silence.

 _No. No. Nononononononono..._

In the operation room was a cacophony of sounds: voices, instruments, the deafening alarms of the machines that were monitoring Stick's vitals. He could heard the whistle of the defibrillator in charge, and the sound of his mentor's body when it was electroshocked.

One. Two. Three times, but still, the silence was there.

The hospital was full of noise.

There were people speaking, children whimping and relieved laughs, but everything was silence.

Hell's Kitchen was chaos.

Ambulances, police cars, firefighters.

Cats fighting and people having sex.

Drug dealers and families.

Still, everything was silence, because the only thing Matt could hear right now was the absolute quiet left by Stick's heart.

Finally the pain came... But he was still here, in this room. And it wasn't his wound's pain.

It was a deeper sorrow, more painful than everything he has experienced before, with only one exception. He knew too well that feeling, he remembered it from the day his father had died.

It was like having a rock stuck into his chest that had suddenly exploded, spreading big pieces of grit and ash all over his insides. It burned and stung and scratched and... it just hurt too much.

He couldn't bear it. Not anymore.

Suddenly he begun to feel claustrophobic and breathless under his mask, as if ash had filled his lungs, preventing air from reaching them and the sensation grew worse the more he realized what had really happened.

His hands rose, trying compulsively to pull off the hood. Somewhere his brain was yelling at him, saying it was useless since it didn't cover his nose and mouth, and apparently Claire agreed with it because she was trying to stop him, but he just ignored everything and everyone.

-Matt, Matthew!- her voice was something less than a whisper. He heard her usually reassuring tone, but he couldn't force himself to be tranquilized by it, still fighting against her to free his own face -It's too dangerous. Keep it on!-

-Claire. Claire. Please...- he begged her and the second she surrendered he threw that damn thing off and with it some of his hair. Claire was fast in locking the door and the she was back to him, making him lean his face in her shoulder.

Matt was panting, his mouth open looking for air, and the nurse released her grasp to let him raise his head and breath. His chest wanted to blow itself up, and it was trying hard, but there was something, like a straightjacket or steel cylinder around it, pressing it so hard as if it wanted to crunch his ribs and lungs up like an empty bin. The two opposite forces were battling against each other, equally strong and aching, and he was stuck helplessly in the middle of it. He wished he could cry or shout or do something to release the pressure but he couldn't find the voice, or the strength… and he needed air…. and...

-Calm down, Mike. Calm down...- Claire's voice was enough to stop the war. The pressure suddenly vanished and oxygen filled his lungs. The steel cylinder was gone, and his rib cage was now able to expand again.

-I... I can't... Lose him, Claire. I... I can't. I… It's my… f… fault…-

 _ **000**_

Claire barely recognized Matt's words or voice. It exited from his chest as a choked shout, all cracked and shaking at the same time. That sudden crisis scared her, because in his condition nothing was announcing that sort of panic attack.

-Mike… Matt - she breathed the second name right beside his left ear. She had felt some vibration in her throat, but not the sound of her own voice, but she was sure he could hear her. She couldn't help but use his real name when everything she had tried before hadn't worked -Breathe. Just breathe… Breathe-

She focused her full attention on her boyfriend, trying to make him stop from doing this mixture between a desperate cry, a panic attack and a speech that seemed to tear his whole body apart.

-Stop talking. Stop talking. Later, Mike. You'll explain later- she whispered, her hand on his forearms to let him room for coming up for air easier but without depriving him of her presence.

-Breathe, Mike, come on. Breathe. I'm here with you- She didn't know how it was possible for her voice to come out so steady and reassuring while she was beginning to be in a sweat by herself, because she didn't have a clue on what was going on, and Matt wasn't helping.

-I... I... St... Stick... Is... M' fault...-

-He's going to be ok, Mike... -

She wasn't ready when he suddenly pushed her away with all his strength. She withdrew a few steps, choking a cry to not making things worse for him, trying and failing not to finish with her butt on the floor, but what shocked her the most was the words he screamed.

-HE IS DEAD!- and then he curled himself into a red ball on the gurney she had made him sit on, sobbing as if his own words had broken him.

For a second, she could do nothing but stay where she had fallen, staring at the young man, unable to move a single muscle, because she wasn't sure on what to do and because she couldn't believe something like that had really happened, right here and now, under Matt's supersensitive ears.

The sound of an hand smashing into the door shook her out her catatonic state of mind.

-Temple?! Is everything alright in there? Open up!- she swallowed hard to find the voice to answer

-I'm ok, doc! I'm coming!-

She reached for the mask Matt had let fall down on the ground and approached him, thinking of make him put it on, but when she could finally see his face, his unfocused eyes full of tears, after she had taken his head and turned it gently toward her, she decided she couldn't.

-Stay there, Mike- she put a soft kiss on his forehead -Keep your face hidden-

He grabbed the light blue shirt of her job suit, all his body imploring her not to leave him, and only God knew how she wanted to accomplish that, but the man outside the door was threatening to break in and that was the last thing she (they) needed. -I'll be right back. I promise- and ignoring his pleas she opened the door and exited.

-Are you ok?- John was there with Marie and two security guards.

-Yeah, yeah... He just... Uhm... Felt... Or saw... Or I don't know... His friend had died- she didn't have to fake how shocked she was.

-Can we talk to him?-

-Not right now... I was planning to leave him alone for a while to calm himself down. He is... upset- that was the first word that came up in his mind, but it wasn't even nearly close to the reality -He might have superpowers... But he is still human-

 _Please, please, please... Stop asking..._

-Claire, why don't we take a coffee?- Marie stepped into the conversation, saving her for more than probable thorny questions she didn't want to be asked -You might bring him one too- the nurse looked at her friend, then John, who simply nodded his consent. Claire followed the colleague, sighing in relief and thanking the other girl, trying to shut her conscience up. She shouldn't be there. She should go back to that room and stay with his boyfriend, but no, she couldn't. She had to pretend he was a stranger, because Matt was a freaking vigilante and had decided to come here under his superhero identity. -So? Did you see his face?- the girl asked, and under different circumstances she would be amused by his curiosity, but not right now.

-No, never. Just his torso- she answered, making her voice clearly tired while she filled three mugs of coffee and offered the first one to the other nurse.

-And that dumpster thing?- Of course she was asking for more detail about that episode, but Claire decided to play numb and pretend to think the main question was still the face behind the mask.

-Same thing- she almost snapped, and Marie took the message.

-Well, if I were you, I'd call my lawyer boyfriend- she suddenly changed topic and the seriousness in her voice caught her attention.

-Why? Am I in trouble?-

-No, you aren't. He might be. I overheard the doctor talking about calling the police-

Of course there would be an investigation. She cursed herself in her mind for not having thought about it by herself. It was the standard procedure. She had to think about something to make him leave the hospital. On the outside, she nodded and thanked her before going back to the room where she had left Matt.

 _ **000**_

He was alone, Claire had left him and he just couldn't react or doing anything but whimpering like a child for someone he had always declared to despise. After having screamed Stick's death, he could finally breathe again, but his body has decided to betray him one more time and he had found himself sobbing and silently begging Claire to stay with him.

Somewhere behind his melancholy his brain had registered the threat of the doctors and Claire's words, so it made him relax his grip on her shirt and bring his hands over his head to cover his face while she was going out.

Now he was alone, he let everything out and let all his body and soul be overwhelmed by his desperate cry, refusing to try to figure why exactly Stick's loss was so devastating. Eventually he got tired and his exhausted body had stopped his outburst, leaving him weak and slightly shaking. He didn't move, though. He just...stayed there, tears still flowing from his closed eyes.

He shifted from his position only when he heard Claire step into the room again, and he was surprised when before that he caught the key turning into the keyhole, as if she had locked him into that room. He was already starting to feel a bit betrayed by her lack of trust when a bell rang in his brain, telling him she wasn't keeping him in. She was keeping the others out.

Claire's scent was mashed up with coffee and soon he found himself sit on the small mattress keeping in his hand a warm mug, Claire right beside him with her hand lightly squeezing his lap. He slowly sipped the coffee, his mind somewhere in Australia or the Antarctic, in an alternative universe where Stick was still a dick, but also still alive. He felt like everything was happening somewhere on TV, in a TV-show or a bad motion picture and then, without any kind of notification, his mind was teleported into that movie, and everything felt as though it had been made anew...and he collapsed again leaning back on the stretcher again.

Claire hadn't said a word, so far.

She had just let him cry himself out, hidden in the pillow, rubbing his back until he couldn't cry any longer.

-Mike?- Claire eventually spoke, when she felt like he was not weeping anymore -The doctor wants to speak with you, as soon as you are ready. He knows you already know but...-

-Yeah. Yeah. Ok, sure- he managed somehow to raise and turn his head toward her -Uhm... Do I need a lawyer?-

And he was as surprised as she was when he heard his mouth say that. His mind had come back without a word and had settled itself on his practical mode. -I mean, there will be an investigation, right?-

-Uhm.. Yeah, I guess... I mean, that's the procedure.- she lowered her voice -or you can knock me unconscious and flee-

He shook his head firmly.

-No. You've already told them you've helped me before. If I escape now, I would look guilty and you would be under investigation, too. No. I'm going to talk to the police if I have to. They don't think I am a criminal anymore. Well, not so much, at least.- and if things started to turn out bad, he could always flee later without her getting involved, he thought, but he knew better than to say that.

He felt Claire kneeling down and pick something up from the floor, then she was putting again his helmet over his head, the way she used to do at home, kissing him slightly before covering his eyes.

-Ready, Little Horn?- He didn't feel like he could be able to smile right now, but the nickname did his job and his lips curved on a sad half-smile. Then she opened the door, and let the doctor, John, come in.

He could felt clearly his fear. His body was tensed and he could hear the fold he had in his hands slightly shaking. He couldn't see himself in the suit, but all his friends had assured him more than once he was quite frightening in that guise.

-I know you did your best, doctor- he said quietly, in the least creepy voice he could put together without using Matt's usual tone. -And I'd like to thank you and your crew for that-

And Matt meant it wholeheartedly. He had known since the beginning that it might turn into a lost battle, and Stick had warned him about that too before... He felt his eyes stinging for tears. _Not now_. He forced himself to focus again on the doctor. His speech seemed to work, the man relaxed as much as the Devil's presence could allow him, and when he spoke his voice was steady... Ish.

-Well, yes... Uhm thank you... Sir?-

-Mike is fine- he encouraged. Somehow he wasn't really comfortable to be called Daredevil. Sure, it was his codename but it was also something that made him like a superhero, and he didn't feel like being one. not right now, at least.

-Mike... Well... his heart has stopped, I... I am very sorry about your... friend?-

-Yeah... Sort of- honest enough. -Do I need a lawyer?- he asked then.

-Uhm... No. I was thinking...no one but us and Marie had seen you after you came in so... We might just say to the police you brought him here and then you just disappeared, if it is ok for you-

It was more than ok. That could be good. The doctors could testify to his innocence and Claire wouldn't be implicated. He felt like shit for leaving Stick's here like that, but there was nothing more he could do, even as Matt Murdock. For the law, he was nothing to him, not even his lawyer, so there was no way they would give him the body, although maybe the hospital would call Father Lantom to take care of everything. He nodded and raised a hand, allowing John to shake it.

-Thank you, again- he whispered.

-The girl you saved last week, she was my sister. So, thank you-

When he left, Claire kissed him one more time.

-Go home. I will be there in an hour-

-What time is it?- from the temperature of the glass of the window he could perceive it was still dark...then he understood. And what he managed to say after he had realized what she was suggesting, because all in his body and soul was begging him to say yes was only a weak -No, Claire. Stay. I appreciate that... I really do, but it would be suspicious-

-Give me a favour- she said nodding, almost begging -go to Foggy's place. Don't stay alone, please-

God. He had almost forgot about Foggy. He had no idea how he would be able to give him the news, or what his reaction would be, and he didn't feel like to discover it that night. Foggy wouldn't understand his sorrow or why he was feeling so guilty about it, but he wasn't ready to tell his best friend (or someone else for what that matter) what had happened like three hours ago.

-I can take care of myself- he whispered.

-I'll call Foggy- she offered and once again he wondered how it was possible he was such an open book to her. He thought about refusing that, but somewhere deep inside him, he couldn't bear to stay alone in his apartment, where everything (well, not exactly, he had fixed it after...that) would reminded him of his mentor.

-Thanks- he nodded, then he made his way outside the window.

 _ **000**_

When Claire asked if she could have a break after the last hour, no one dared to turn her down. She seemed really tired out to everyone, and she wasn't surprised when she realized she really was.

All she'd wanted right now was her bed, curl herself under the sheets and sleep for at least a week. She exited the hospital, needing air not only to take the chance to phone to Foggy without being bothered, but also to try to wash away the rush of emotions that were threatening to overwhelm her.

It took a while to him to answer, and she wouldn't actually call that… moan? Groan? Piss and moan? like that, anyway.

-Foggy- she said, seriously -Wake up-

Apparently, the sound of her voice so late in the night was more effective than everything else to drag him out of his sleep in less than half a second.

-How's Matt?-

-Stick is dead- She forked over that bomb without any notification. She hadn't meant to be so rude about that, because the old man was still a subject Foggy avoided heartily after what he had seen him do (Karen had told her once he still woke up screaming during the night, dreaming of him throwing Matt out of the window), but she was tired, and Matt was alone and… she just did that.

-What? When? How?- he paused, too shocked to think, then he began again, speaking so fast she could barely keep up with his words. -How's Matt? Where is he? Is he ok?-

-Daredevil brought him here…- she explained, suddenly emptied by all the adrenaline that had kept her in motion so far -we tried our best but…-

-Where is he? Is he there? Does he need a lawyer?- exhausted or not, she couldn't avoid to wonder why in the hell those two were so struck with that.

-No, the doctor had let him go before calling the police. There is going to be an investigation, of course, but DD is not involved. Foggy, he is going home, and I am blocked here until 7 am…-

-I'm going. Don't worry. He will not be alone-

-Thanks… and…-

-No question. Got it. That's why I'm not speaking to him right now, isn't it?-

She felt a smile rise on her face, and silently hoped Matt was aware how lucky he was to have him.

-See you tomorrow, then. Thank you-

 _ **000**_

The phone call had woken Karen up too, mostly because Foggy was too upset to pay attention to the noise he was making while dressing himself as fast as he could.

-What?- she managed to mumble still more asleep than awake, then she jumped -Is Matt ok?-

It took a while to Foggy to answer her because was apparently trying to put off his pajama and on a sweatshirt at the same time, with the obvious result to almost choke himself. Eventually, she reached for him and took the upper part of the night garment off him. Foggy looked at her, but Karen couldn't find any clues from his face, and that was strange because when Matt was involved, she could always tell how bad it was just from his look.

-What happened?- she urged when he didn't speak.

-Stick…- he began, but then words failed him.

-Not again…- she whispered, thinking Matt had been pressured to leave once more.

-What? No… he… he is dead.-

-What?-

-Claire phoned me a minute ago. I'm going to Matt.-

Well, at least that explained his lack of expression. Presumably he didn't exactly know how to react to the news. It was a good thing, or a bad one? Stick had hurt all of them, and Foggy was still trying to forget the "window accident", that's what Matt called it, and she wouldn't be surprised nor she would blame him if Foggy might think it wasn't such a big loss.

She knew better than offer to go with him; Matt would surely be messed up and there was no space for her in this. He needed his best friend.

-Foggy- she hugged him tight -Calm down before going to his apartment. He needs his best friend, the one who isn't relieved by all this, ok?-

-Am I such a bad person if I am?-

-What?-

-Relieved-

-You saw him almost kill your brother, it's ok. Just… don't say that to Matt. Be strong, because if Claire called you, he must be pretty shit right now-

He nodded and left her alone.

 _ **000**_

Foggy had no idea of what was waiting for him behind the door of his best friend's house. He had knocked a couple of times, loud enough to be sure Matt could hear him, but when he got no answers he decided to open with his spare key.

-Matt? It's Foggy. Don't kick my ass. Please...-

Still, there was no reply to his sentence. He looked around at the room. Everything was at its place, except for the red suit that laid forgotten on the floor. He took it, feeling it in his hands for the first time. It was lighter than he had thought, but it was also made of some kind of fiber he didn't recognize, something similar to kevlar but also mixed with something else that made it practical for fights. The blond folded and placed it on the couch before making his way to the small kitchen. Everything looked at its place, and since no sound was coming from the bathroom he decided to check the bedroom.

-Matt? It's Foggy- he called again -I'm coming to your bedroom. Don't freak out, ok?-

 _Please be in your bedroom..._

-Roof- he sighed with relief when he finally heard his friend's voice and hurried to join him outside. -Sorry- Matt apologized when they both were sitting on the edge, The blind one with his legs in the air, Foggy sit in the opposite direction, both his feet well planted on the floor -I wasn't sure about having company-

-It's ok, Matty. It's ok. Do you want me to leave?-

Foggy wasn't really expecting a yes as an answer, so he froze when Matt spoke, with such a icy voice that it reminded him of Stick.

-Yes, please. And don't come back-

-Matt…-

-Nelson & Murdock is over starting from now. And tell Claire she can keep the apartment-

 _What the he…_ then Foggy made the connection, and was really tempted to push his best friend down off that roof.

-Not a chance, Murdock. And it's not your fault if your dad and Stick died, ok? And we are not gonna die just because we live around you-

 _ **000**_

This time was his turn to froze, then he realized how stupid his plan had been from the beginning, and how stupid he had been trying to fool Foggy like that. It might work maybe with Karen, or with Claire, but obviously not with the guy who had lived for four years with him.

-I want you to be safe- he managed to whisper, shyly, trying to avoid Foggy's eyes.

-Then do your job and keep us safe, you asshole, because I am not leaving your side, and neither are Karen or Claire-

-I don't want you to be hurt… again-

-I was trying to protect you, Matt-

Yeah, and apparently Stick was too, and he had got three bullets in his chest and a funeral he would not be allowed to attend. He didn't want to bring one more of his friends to an hospital fatally wounded; actually, he didn't want someone else to die for him at all. -Buddy?-

-He was trying to protect me too. My dad? The same. Well, more or less and I don't want to lose you, because if I lose you... Or Claire or...-

-Matt, Matt, Matt. Calm down, ok?-

-People who try to protect me usually die! Stick was the last one!-

-What the hell are you saying, Matt? What happened?-

 _ **000**_

And suddenly Matt just stopped talking and bent his knees to curl himself into a ball, a ball dangerously on the ledge of a roof six stories above the street. Foggy had hated that attitude since their college era.

One moment he was practically yelling and then he just went mute and refused to say another word. Anyway, he didn't let his rage show up. Matt'd had a bad night and he just had to be his friend right now.

-Matt? Matty. Little Horn. Listen to me ok? It's ok. I don't really care about what happened ok? Now, please, can we go inside? I'm freezing and I swear I just saw a penguin flying from your roof to the next one-

-Penguins don't fly, Fog-

Matt eventually whispered from somewhere between his folded legs, where he had buried his face. Foggy took the hint and just played along, because arguing-about-penguins Matt was still better than Guilty Matt or Mute Matt.

-They do. Haven't you seen Happy Feet Two?-

-Technically speaking, no I have not.- the blind guy retorted - And Sven wasn't a real penguin, it was a Tufted Puffin-

-That's not the point. The point is I am becoming a fogsicle- finally Matt rose his head, with the shadow of a half smile on his lips

-It's not that cold, Foggy...but...ok- he suddenly sounded weary.

-Come on, buddy, let's go to bed and try to get some sleep. You look like shit-

Matt didn't answer, but followed him inside. Foggy wasn't stupid; he knew they would not have much rest that night.

* * *

Thanks for reading.

I… uhm… I'm sorry?


	18. What's worse than Nobu?

**A/N** : Ok, here we are. This is the final chapter of Friendship & Loyalty. I'm a little bit sad about this, because this story meant a lot to me, it helped me in a very though time of my life and everything, but, hey, every story has to have an end sooner or later, so...

I'd really like to thank in the first place my amazing beta **InsertImaginativeNameHere**. Thank you for all your work, your patience, you grammar explanations and everything you have done for me with this story. Really. Thank you.

And then, thank you to all the 37 people who followed this story and the 22 who inserted it in their favourite list. It was way more of what I was expecting when I began, and I really hope you enojoyed reading this story as much as I did in writing it!

Special thanks to all the people who left a review through all the chapters, I really appreciated all of them!

One more thing, then I leave you to the chapter, I promise. This would not be the last work you'll see from me on this site: I am working on a crossover Daredevil/Suits and I have also written one and a half one-shot in italian. I'm just waiting to have the time to translate them in English, plus, I'm seriously thinking about a sequel for Friendship & Loyalty, so maybe let me know if you'd like to read more of this, please.

Now I really leave you read the chapter!

Happy reading!

And remember, I don't bite who reviews, but I might who doesn't :)

* * *

 ** _Chapter 18:What's worse than Nobu?_**

* * *

Claire would literally smash Matt's alarm clock against a wall some day. And by smash she meant the Hulk kind of smash. She hated that fucking high robotic voice yelling it was 8am every single morning when she had just managed to fall asleep, because what the hell, Matt!

He didn't even need that thing anymore, because usually he was already awake to make her a snack when she came back from a shift.

Then, thinking about it...why delay the inevitable? She rolled and reach for the white instrument of torture and threw it with all her strength.

-Whoa!- Matt ducked his head just in time to not get hit by the object, that instead collided with the panel. Finally silence -What did it do to you to deserve such a punishment?-

-It got on my nerves, like, a lot- she smiled innocently -and if you don't want to follow suit, you'd better let me sleep. Or stop sending us criminals with a stupid amount of bad-but-not-lethal injuries. Or again, put your suit on and go out for a dinner with Marie. She has a crush for your friend DD and she's acting like a teenager-

-Do I have to pick one?- he smiled back, and Claire felt warmth rising inside her heart, it was one of the first things he had said to her. Beside that, it was so rare to make him smile lately that Foggy had begun to take it as a personal challenge (which, by the way, she thought was a bad idea, but Foggy was Foggy, so… hey).

-Or just do all of them. Your choice. But no sex with Marie- he grinned, the Han Solo kind of mischievous grin, while she got up to help him with his tie; not that he needed it, he had done that by himself since forever, but she liked do that, and he let her, so...

The nurse kissed his forehead, wishing him a good day before going back to bed, but still she couldn't rest.

Stick had died about a month and a half ago and her boyfriend was still firmly in the famous five steps of grief, and all they were trying to help him, but Matt, being Matt, had curled himself into an impenetrable shield made of silence and guilt, and after all that time, they still didn't know what had really happened that night; instead, they had won a stalker (read horn-headed vigilante), and she had to thank Foggy for that.

At the beginning, she had thought it was just the cutest thing someone had ever done for her; every morning Matt had been waiting for her outside the ER, and every evening and night she had received at least one visit from Daredevil. He had said he missed her, and she just had believed it, despite the fact he was more tired every day that passed. Then, one evening, like thirty minutes after the beginning of the shift, an ambulance had come, carrying a scrappy Matt and a desperate and exasperated Foggy. It had turned out that her totally insane boyfriend had put himself into a third job, their bodyguard. When he wasn't on patrol or in the office, he just staked them out, depriving himself of the few hours he usually managed to sleep between his activities.

Between the two of them, Claire and Foggy had found a quite good explanation for his weariness and he had been sent home after a couple of hours. She had taken the rest of the night to stay with him, and she had found really hard to not kill them when Matt whispered a shy "Foggy told me I have to protect you", because... seriously? Your best friend is a totally insane good catholic boy and you tell him to protect all of us?

Now things were a little better, but she still hated not to be able of helping him as she'd wanted and his silence wasn't really helping. Claire now just hoped he could find the strength to talk to Father Lantom, at least, because she had learnt the priest was a good friend, and she hoped he would find some peace coming from him, or the Bible, or both, which would have been annoying from her point of view (girlfriends were also for this kind of stuff, right?) but it was also still better than nothing.

 _ **000**_

-So, Matt...are you and Claire coming, right? - Matt's head tilted in surprise, his attention suddenly brought from his work to his best friend, a confused look on his face.

-Where?-

-At Christmas dinner- oh. That. Matt had almost (ok, maybe completely) forgotten about the traditional Nelsons' Christmas reunion. His family had basically adopted him in something like 30 seconds the first time Foggy had dragged him home and since then Matt had just become a member of that crazy family and, after a while, he had begun to get used to Foggy's mom's hugs and everything and he usually got secretly (he had a rep, after all) excited about the reunions. Still, this year everything seemed far away from him, as if he had been watching the world behind a glass.

-Uhm... I don't know... I haven't talked with Claire yet-

-I don't care, you two are coming, so I won't be the only one giving grandma a wedding to plan-

Matt rolled his eyes and rewarded his partner with a shy smile.

The truth was he wasn't exactly in a mood for celebrating. His mind kept going back to the night he had lost Stick, and he simply wasn't able to move on. -Buddy?- he felt a warm hand resting on his forearm, and he just nodded, because it was Foggy and sometimes he did his best speeches without saying a word.

When he got home he remembered it was Claire's night off and that Karen wasn't going to kidnap her for some kind of girl stuff this evening, so they simply decided to stay at home. They enjoyed a simple dinner with just some pasta.

Matt was suddenly nervous about telling her about the dinner, and for the first time he realized how much he considered the Nelsons his own family. He felt as if he was introducing her to his real parents.

Calm down, Little Horn. No. Not the inner Foggy Bear voice again! Anything but that!

He took a deep breath and held Claire closer.

-Are you ok, Matt?-

-Mmm... Yeah... I mean... Just... I wanted to ask you something...-

-Are you nervous, Little Horn?- he didn't miss the amusement in her voice and took another breath. He could do this. What the hell, he was the man without fear, wasn't he?

-Mmm... There is a dinner...for Christmas...I'd really like to go with you-

-At the church?-

-Foggy's parents'- he whispered.

 _ **000**_

Claire raised his head to look at him. They hadn't made plan so far for Christmas eve, mostly because she wasn't sure about what his habits were. Sure, she remembered what Foggy told her in Boston, but she didn't know if they had kept that ritual.

-What's wrong with them?-

-N...nothing- Matt seemed confused by the question, but somehow he managed to say that they were ok -It's just... I've never brought... Uhm... A girlfriend... And...so... If you...don't... I mean... I'd love to... But if...you...-

That was shy Matt again, and, she loved shy Matt, even when it was hard to understand his words like now, but she didn't have to. She had got the point pretty fast and she couldn't restrain her smile. He was nervous to introduce her to his family. She shifted from her position to held him in a tight hug, shutting him up with a hand on his mouth.

-I'm coming, Little Horn. I'd love to meet your family- and the big smile on his face was something she could never forget. It was pure happiness, something rare inside Matt even before Stick's death, and she let his smile fill her heart.

 _ **000**_

What's worse than Nobu?

Claire and Karen coming toward him together. That was worse than fighting the Japanese man and Fisk at the same time. Mostly because that alliance meant he was in trouble, like a lot of trouble.

But he had no a clue about what he had done this time, so he tried to put his desk between him and the two girls.

-We have to talk- Karen started off, placing both her hands on the table.

-Do we?- he asked trying to not panic. What the hell had he done?

-Definitely, Little Horn- Claire echoed, her arms crossed against her chest.

Ok, he was definitely in some kind of trouble with the two most dangerous women in town (put it this way, they could have given his ex Elektra a run for her money), he had to find out the reason if he wanted to survive. They were only coming after him so there were two possibilities: either they had already tortured, questioned and killed him or Foggy was innocent this time, which led directly to his night job, which, in turn, could mean that his best friend could be involved in that alliance too.

He was thinking but he was pretty sure he had done nothing wrong. Ok, he had sent two people with more broken bones than bones in their bodies last night, and he might or might not have kissed Marie's cheek before leaving the hospital, but in his own defense, the girl was stalking him and she would have menaced him jumping from roof to roof if he hadn't. Behind that, nothing came to his mind.

-What can I do for you, ladies?- he tried, showing the best of his wounded-suck-polite smile along with his puppy eyes.

-You really think that pretty face will move us?- Karen asked.

Ok. He was definitely dead. He was a freaking vigilante, but he would die at the hand of his girlfriend and secretary. What a shame!

-You have put us in a big trouble, you know?- Claire cut off every other request for mercy.

-A big one- Karen completed -Now, you will tell us everything you know about Foggy's family or New York will have one less vigilante-

Seriously? THEY were nervous about it?

Matt was the man without fear, so he took the risk.

-Not a chance, girls, sorry-

-What? No, Matt. Please. Come on. Help us- It was amazing how fast Karen could change from menacing to begging in a heartbeat.

-I didn't have any idea of it when I first met them. I don't want to deprive you of the surprise-

-Matty, please…- . He had to admit that. When Claire was begging his steadfastness vacillated but he managed to hold on somehow. Plus, they had nothing to worry about. Matt was sure they would be part of the family in less than a minute.

 _ **000**_

-Matt? Seriously, a little help here?-

-I am blind, Claire. I mean. I can feel there are trousers, a sweater… uhm… maybe a shirt? and a dress. Beyond that… -

Claire looked at him. It was Christmas eve morning, and she was trying to find the perfect outfit for the evening, but now she was worried about Matt. He looked sad, even if he pretended to sound chilled out.

-Matt? What's wrong?- she asked making a step to reach for his hand and make him sit on the bed, moving the clothes out of their way at the same time. -Do you want to stay at home? We can go tomorrow-

-What? No. No. It's fine. Really... -

-Then what?-

-It's just... - and he just stopped, and Claire sighed. Here they were again. The nurse had learnt that every time he went mute like that, he was thinking about something related to the night of Stick's death, and that, by the way, was still a top secret file.

-Matt. What happened that night? I've never asked before, but whatever it is, it's tearing you apart, and I just can't bear it anymore-

She realized she had said the wrong words as soon as they had been spoken. He still had this fear of being left. His hands began to shake slightly in hers and his head ducked. -Matt..-

she said softly, reassuring -I'm not leaving you. Ok? I didn't meant that. You know. It's just…-

-I know, Claire. I'm sorry- he stood and made his way directly to the roof. She sighed but didn't follow him. He needed to be alone.

Foggy's family was… Foggy-ish?

Claire couldn't find any other words to describe that crazy clan made of Nelsons of all ages.

As soon as they arrived, she and Karen had been sucked into a vortex of hugs and kisses and more hugs and endless names. There were Nelsons, like, everywhere, the house was bursting at the seams with all of them, and Claire couldn't help but ask herself how Matt could have survived all of this the first time he had been there.

It was like being surrounded by a lot of optional Foggy's; noisiness and childish enthusiasm included.

Claire and Karen had tried to survive to all of this and eventually they had found a spot on the couch near the fireplace and as far away as possible from Foggy's Grandmothers (yes, both of them). It had turned out Matt wasn't the only one bringing a girl at home for the first time, and the two lovely grannies had become more thrilled than it was probably healthy at their age about two possible (ok, they thought certain) marriages in their family.

The nurse and the secretary had been quite literally kidnapped by the two old ladies, who had found in their little nieces loyal soldiers.

In all this, they had tried, of course, to call Foggy and Matt for help, but the two of them had seemed to be invisible. Your boyfriend is a freaking superhero but when you really need him, he is M.I.A. Thank you, Little Horn.

Finally, they could have a break from the plans for their double wedding and sit on the sofa with a tired sigh of relief.

-I'm going to kill Matt for this- Karen declared -It was his duty to warn us about all of this!-

-And I'm going to help you. He is…-

And suddenly they found the two friends. They were playing with three little kids, the children of they didn't remember which brother or sister or cousins or whatever (seriously there was a stupid amount of people in this home, how did they all fit? Was it bigger on the inside or something?) and for the first time Claire could see...just Matt. Not the lawyer struggling to keep his own firm alive, or the blind guy with supersensitive ears, or Daredevil. He was just a regular guy enjoying some time with his... Nephews? Had she just heard "Uncle Matt?"

-That's not fair- Karen stated.

-Definitely not- the nurse agreed.

-How can we kill him? He is...they are...-

-The personification of cuteness- she completed, losing herself in the sight of Matt with a three or maybe four years old little girl on his laps. He had taken his glasses off the moment the children had stepped into the living room, saving them from a certain destruction, and he looked like he was completely lost in a world made of "why" questions and childish toys.

The little girl was describing her new bride-dressed Barbie (seriously?) to him, making him touch every single part along with the description, so he could "understand better". Matt was playing along, making question every now and then, then he accepted to marry the doll with his Ken-alter ego.

-That little girl's just stolen your boyfriend-

-Yeah. Noted- she smiled and she could tell Matt had heard them talking because he turned his face gifting them with one of his smiles, adding more cuteness to the cuteness. Then he whispered something in the ear of the child, who gave him the biggest smile she could and then ran toward her.

-Aunt Claire! Aunt Claire!- she yelled almost literally jumping on her knees, and both of them were so surprise that she felt her face getting hot, while Karen began to laugh. The nurse whispered an "I'll kill you, Murdock" between her teeth, sure the kid wouldn't notice, but at the same time that her ending-soon-if-he-kept-doing-this boyfriend would pick every single word up. She smiled at the little girl, recovering from the shock.

-Hi, sweety! What can I do for you?-

-Uncle Matt says you love playing with Barbies! Wanna play with me?-

Dammit, Murdock.

-Sure! Let's go! Aunt Karen, you on board with this?-

-Absolutely-

 _ **000**_

The rest of the evening passed in a flash, and soon the four friends found themselves in what had once been Foggy's bedroom; Claire and Karen on his bed while the boys were sharing the floor because of the lack of space, the house finally silent now that everyone was asleep somewhere between the bedrooms, the kitchen and the living room.

In a moment, the blond one was aware of how much noisy his family was, or better, now he knew about Matt's incredible ears.

-Hey, buddy, are you ok?- he whispered -You know...all this...-

-I'm ok, Foggy. It's noisy and a little bit overwhelming sometimes but... It's ok. I kinda like it, actually. It's like...having some kind of...uhm...some kind of shield protecting me from what's outside...-

-Like with your dad...- Claire stated gently in a low voice, moving herself from the bed to Matt's side. Karen was already sleeping, so they kept their voice very low to not wake her up.

-Yeah- Matt agreed -Sort of...-

 _ **000**_

Sort of his ass. It was exactly like with his dad, and he felt quite the same way when he was with Claire. Hell, he could even stand the hospital without freaking out to see her. He did not go mad the night Stick died; she was with him and he didn't get overwhelmed although he wasn't in the best condition to focus and cut everything out.

Since that night he had fought hard with himself, as if he had been split in two: one side, the one that made him panic every time he had a fight with Claire, was begging him to speak about what had happened at least with Claire and Foggy, because secrets were bad. Secrets had already made Foggy go away from him, and he didn't want to repeat the experience. It was his Matt-ish part.

The other one was pure Daredevil, and, being that, it just wanted to keep his friends safe, he wanted to spare them from anguish and fear. It was the side who thought that it was good for them to keep hating Stick, because it was easier and less painful.

He had been in the center of that inner fight, totally unable to take a final decision...until now.

Screw Daredevil. He couldn't go on this way. So, he held Claire closer, focusing on her even breath to calm down and find the strength to go back to that night, when he had heard Stick's swear between all the typical chaos of the night of Hell's Kitchen.

 _At the beginning, he had thought to make just a small stroll, carefully listening to catch possible help requests. He had a rough day at work and he was tired enough he hadn't been able to hide it even to Karen (not to mention Foggy), so he wanted to come back home early enough to sleep more than usual._

 _For once, everything had_ _gone according to plan_ _until he_ _caught a mention of_ _his name. It wasn't so unusual after Fisk's arrest. It was a well-known thing that he and Foggy'd had a main part during the whole operation and also that they were helped by Daredevil. Still, he decided to stop for a minute, trying to figure if he had something to worry about._

 _He tilted his head, focusing on the direction of the voices, brought him from the light breeze. It took him a while because they were coming from some kind of warehouse quite far from him and at the beginning he wasn't really sure about the direction. It took him a while and the wind tricked him a couple of times before he could detect the precise location._

 _In the meantime he could tell they were torturing someone to wring some information about him out of someone, and the was racking his brain trying to figure out who their victim could be. He had checked all his close friends at the beginning of the patrol, so he was quite sure they were safe. He found out who he was only when he had been on the roof of the building._

 _ **000**_

-Matt?- Foggy whispered when their friend stopped talking, all his body slightly shaking against her back, his hold tightening around her chest. They didn't have to ask anything when suddenly Matt had started talking in his lowest voice, with no explanation or notification but his arms squeezing her gently and strong at the same time. Claire had crossed her gaze with Foggy's, not knowing how to react to Matt's sudden wish to share.

Foggy, being Foggy, just accepted the confession, inviting her doing the same with a single nod, and he had been the first to answer to this new silence; She looked at Foggy and moved only her lips a in a single unspoken "no". She was thinking he would ask Matt to go on, but, again, when he completely ignored her warning, she discovered how much she kept underestimating him. -You don't have to do this, buddy- he whispered closing the distance between them to reach for his arm.

-N...no. I...owe you-

-You owe us nothing, Matt- Claire replied shifting and turning into his arm to look at him. She knew it was quite useless since he was blind, but she needed to look into his eyes, barely visible in the dark of the room. He ducked his head to look at her and she took the opportunity to kiss him slightly. -Go ahead only if you want to, Matty- Foggy supported her.

He took a deep, calming breath and began to spoke again.

 _ **000**_

 _He could recognize Stick's heartbeat everywhere, because it was like listening to an old man with the heart of a middle-aged man, a quite creepy mixture he had always found somehow fascinating in its own way. He made his way into the building, moving cautiously in order to not being caught. The closer he got, the clearer became the voices._

 _-That kid...i...is...use...useless- Stick was saying, his voice broken by coughs that betrayed some kind of internal injuries. Matt focused on his mentor's body: his temperature was slightly higher than it should be and he could feel what seemed to be a couple of broken ribs in his chest. When he extended his senses to the rest of it, he was certain Stick had been tortured, even if he couldn't tell how long and bad so far. -Y...you don't...need him. He...he knows...nothing-_

 _-You trained him. And the_ _one they call_ _Daredevil_ _too_ _. Do you really think we'll believe you?-_

 _Matt ducked his head. Stick was protecting him, despite everything. He shook his head to clear his head from the distracting thought. They would have the time to deal with that later, now he had to find a way to bring Stick out of there, preferably without getting killed._

 _-He...knows...nothing-_

 _-So you brought him out of The Kitchen right when we were looking for him for nothing?-_

 _Matt froze. Stick's heartbeat changed slightly. He knew he was there._

 _-I was protecting him from you idiots. That's why I've never_ _completed_ _his training!-_

 _Matt wasn't stupid. Stick wasn't talking to his captor anymore; he was talking to him, telling him to stay out of this, to go away. And, not for the first time, he wondered why his mind and body could be so good at following his orders. He found himself completely unable to get into the scene, giving the people the Devil they were looking for so badly. In fact, it was likely that they wanted to use Matt Murdock as a bait for his vigilante alter-ego or, at least, that was what he thought. He just froze where he was, completely still, listening to what was happening._

 _-So, Matt Murdock knows nothing and you neither. That makes you useless to us, Stick, do you know that, don't you?-_

 _-Exactly- he confirmed and Matt could imagine a grin on his face. -Murdock can't help you with the war. He can't fight anymore, and he can't kill-_

 _-And you have no idea of where the Daredevil is- it was a statement, not a question. Matt's heartbeat increased. Stick was playing with fire, and he was damn close to being burnt._

 _-Correct, again-_

 _And then, there were the three shots. Fast, close and shocking._

 _ **000**_

Matt was now basically whimpering, barely able to keep talking. Claire had shifted again during his speech and his head was now leaning on her lap, and she had one hand in his hair while the other one was weaved together with his.

-Matty…- Foggy whispered moving himself to get closer to them, wrapping Matt in one of his best hugs. Claire took the chance to dry her own tears, feeling now so guilty about everything she had thought about Stick until...well ten minutes ago.

They all were convinced he was a monster and yes, maybe he actually was because he still had killed people, kidnapped Karen and Foggy and thrown Matt out of a fucking window, but now he was dead, and he had died protecting both of Matt's identities.

Matt now was openly crying in her arms, loud enough to wake Karen, who sat there looking confused, but didn't give a second thought seeing him like that. She ran out of the bed to reach the trio on the floor. She didn't ask anything, just joined them, slowly rubbing Matt's back.

Eventually, he calmed down enough to keep talking.

-I attacked them, and brought Stick out of there-

-Was he still…- Foggy whispered.

-Yes, he was. He didn't want me to treat him. He said…- his voice broke. He took a deep breath before going on -He said… they were looking for me and Daredevil to fight their war…-

-This again?- Foggy looked exasperated and Claire couldn't really blame him. That war against only God knew (maybe, she wasn't sure) who or what had ruined Matt's life more than once and it was starting to get annoying, mostly because everyone seemed to think he would have been essential for it. Matt simply nodded, then kept talking.

-Stick told me they are on the other side, that they want me to win-

-Who the hell are you? Some kind of chosen guy? Or what?- Foggy meant to release the pressure in the room, but Matt wasn't in the mood for that.

-I swear, Foggy… I don't know. I really don't know. He said… they were looking for me, and for that he took me out of Hell's Kitchen, to protect me. And… and when I… when I…-

-When I brought you home?- Claire offered softly

-Yes. He kidnapped Karen to keep her safe while Foggy was the only one who could find me, because he is… you are…-

-I know, buddy. I know.-

-In his own creepy, violent way he loved you, Matt- Karen step into the conversation for the first time.

-Why he didn't simply tell you that? What's the point of all this masquerade?-

For the first time, Matt could manage a little smile.

-Claire, do you remember when I told you someone had told me to push all the people away from me?- he answered. How could she forget? She nodded. -It was him. For all the time he had been with me, he repeated the same mantra: feelings are dangerous, love is a weakness, soldiers have to be alone, et cetera… When he...punished me...it was because...he was angry. I wanted my life back... And he cared so much about me to protect you too...and that drove him crazy...-

-He couldn't admit to himself he cared about you- Foggy murmured.

-It turned out he was right. He loved me. He's dead. Like my dad.- The unspoken was clearly in the air. It was the reason he had tried to push Foggy away that night on the roof and, even before, had helped him when she decided to break up with him.

No. Not again. Not right now.

-Matthew- she whispered. -We trust you, ok? You are going to protect us as you always did before, when you barely knew us. We are a family, ok?-

-I… I can't… be everywhere-

-Then teach us to help ourselves- Foggy stated and six eyes suddenly stared at him (ok, four and half, maybe, or four and a brain or whatever Matt used. Ears?). He looked surprised by the fact no one else was seeing the most obvious solution ever. -If we can fight back a little bit, the time to get somewhere safe, he won't have to do everything alone- he explained, then looked at him. -Please, let me be your padawan ObiMatt KeMurdock-

He couldn't really have said that. Not a chance. Not when he was sober. They all froze for a second, then Matt burst into laughter, and the others followed suit less than an half second after him.

-We are going to be fine, Matt- Karen smiled at him.

 _ **000**_

The next day on their way back home they stopped at the cemetery. Stick's grave was simple and spartan like he had been through his whole life. He didn't have money or relatives who could pay for him, but father Lantom still could let him have a wooden cross with his name both in English and Braille, thanks to an anonymous donation, of course.

Karen and Claire had insisted to bring flowers, at least to say thank you, while Matt had brought a beer. He didn't know exactly why, maybe it was just because flowers were soft, and Stick didn't like soft things.

Foggy had a beer too, and he opened it, waving his hand toward the cross.

-I'd never thought to have to say thank you to someone who almost killed my best friend- he commented taking a sip before passing the bottle to Matt. -Or that my blind best friend could be a superhero… but hey, I guess there is a first time for everything, right?-

Matt smiled squeezing Claire's hand.

Yeah, there was a first time for everything.

Matt was sure the day would come when those people would make the connection between the blind lawyer and Daredevil, but, for now, for the first time, he would try to be a good avocado, a boyfriend, a friend and, of course, a vigilante.

The rest could go to Hell.

 _ **THE END**_

* * *

 _ **Thanks for reading!  
**_

 _ **Stay tuned for others stories.**_

 _ **See you!**_


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